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Feb 2013 · 2.0k
Transplant Journey
Wanderer Feb 2013
He is suffering
The tell tale signs of decay setting in
It's all I can do to not break down

Five hours later

Gentle hum and gurgle of breathing treatment
Wakes me from dreams of good-bye
Sweet and gentle but suffocating
Do you even know I am here anymore?

Two days later

I can hear them whispering outside
He's too fragile, not much else we can do
My voice catches in my throat yearning to rail at them
HOW DARE YOU GIVE UP!
His breath still draws and my hands are fighting

The failings of a weak condition paired with bacterial war are too much to bare. Go home babe. Sleep with the angels for I cannot be selfish and keep you here so tortured.

*I never let go.
Jan 2013 · 1.2k
The Strange and Strangled
Wanderer Jan 2013
You pull
I push
The break is never easy, like taffy cooked too long
Shattering when stretched thin
That's how my inner monologue copes with anorexia
Eating holes straight through
But you could never stand the smell
Driftwood wet-rot thoughts boiling down
Catarizing the wound that always worries
My sluggish heart
Take a deep breath
Swollen and stolen it beats heavy in the starving cavity of my wintery chest
Longing  for summer
For the cosmic revolution that will bring it back around to the aching  center
The sun.  
You.
Life.
Wake me up when night falls
Wake me up with stars burning behind my eyes
Dec 2012 · 506
When the Morning Comes
Wanderer Dec 2012
Im in the process of forgetting
Everything I used to know
Looking up into the vast expanse of the past
I remember that we used to be part of that wandering star dust
One day soon we will be again

A breath of silver coats my lungs
Tasting a luminous horizon
Reaching out to suspend the fabric of my thoughts
Shining
Blinding the shadows into hiding

You only ever yearned to fly
Never to fall
There is such sweet sadness in letting go
That space  between I'm sorry and Good-bye
It waits for us all
*
Even broken down I'm always worth something to you
Dec 2012 · 500
Gone Away:Twilight Song
Wanderer Dec 2012
Your hand, it falls away
I am left in twilight
Always in the growing shadow of your ink stained heart
Crescent moon marks the purple deep of failing strength
To fight
I whisper on the easing wind to come find me
Following the soft edged sorrow you laid bellow
Where are those falling stars now?
Burning straight through
Leaving me blind and broken
The rushing tide of blood drums through my ears
A silky, salt water love song humming me to sleep
In that space between gripping and letting go I can still taste you on the ghostly wisps of nicotine smoke
All that remains is twilight


I'm always left wondering where you've gone
Dec 2012 · 449
Context
Wanderer Dec 2012
I will do it when I **** well please

And don't look at me like that
Like I'll never touch you again or grace you with my presence
I just cannot breathe in here

Your lines remind me of slipping
Further and further off the edge
On a post-it to my notebook.
Nov 2012 · 1.6k
Cathartic
Wanderer Nov 2012
Hollywood is not happy any more
A thousand nights of sequins and *****
Collecting beneath her skirts like love letters
Plastered with admiration and cheap perfume
Blowing into breezy corners as she twists and turns
Escape attempt
Razor glitterati teeth biting at the media's  ankles
GET OUT OF HERE!!!
They never listen
Watching, waiting with flash bulbs and endless ink wells
This will all be over soon
Lit match in her justice hands of frigid midnight
Sins of sulfur and *** saturate
She will burn you all down
Wooden hearts and cork board shoes
Hollow
All to ash before the dawn gives birth
In the aftermath she sheds sooty skin
City once again clean
that is
Until the next ultra gaudy fad comes to town
Nov 2012 · 1.6k
Alter Ego aka Victoria
Wanderer Nov 2012
Your phone calls always startle me
Never knowing what I might find if I pick up
ANSWER THE **** THING!!!
Your voice is deep and melodic
Dragging me back down into the hypnotic ******
Of late night *******
Viiiiiiicccttttoooorrrriiiaaaaaa
Your moans do not escape the pulsing of my secret flesh
Reaching crescendo as I bare witness to the sound of your ***
Just a little longer you say
Tie me up a bit, spank the delectable juicy round of my generous ***
Fantasy handprints mark alabaster like a second grade Thanksgiving turkey art project
Only here feathers are far more threatening
I'll be whatever you want me to be
Between midnight and six a.m.
Caressed by the curling waft of sunlight through smoke and shadow
Your voice fades away into static
Always left wet and wanting for more
Nov 2012 · 921
Malpractice
Wanderer Nov 2012
Helium balloons smell strange
Lending a birthday clown like quality to the sterile state of hospital rooms
My feet hurt from running fluorescent hallways
Your gown was never tied right
Even after you slipped away
Down in the morgue, cold, laying in wait
While I cry myself into exhaustion amongst your death soiled bedding
Still smelling like sickness and you
Nov 2012 · 932
This IsNot A Dream
Wanderer Nov 2012
We stand before them gray and numb
wake up
All eyes vacant, fingers lax
wake up
Waiting patiently, thoughts sterile, for meal time
wake up
On the menu today is fascism
wake up
But we've been fed that so many times before it is
considered comfort food
wake up
All of our threadbare clothes are dull, without variety
wake up
The food sits soggy and weighted in our ravenous gut
wake up
Clawing at the cage of our hearts to do something
wake up
To be something
WAKE UP
Yet still we toil in our once free soil
WAKE UP
The feel of dirt under our nails the only connection to the earth we have left
**WAKE UP
Wanderer Nov 2012
I read today that they plan on patenting our DNA
Placing RFID chips deep inside the child's brain
So that when he grows older he will be tame
Now I don't know about you you or you
But I'd rather be dead than not free
Barbed wire cages with iron for bars
Under the guise of "security"
For the sake and safety of "democracy"
My hands are still shackled
Even though my feet shuffle on
Our children are poisoned by vaccines
Yet if you decline you are an unfit parent
Who are they to ******* say?
Where did our voices go?
Have we become consumed by consumerism?
Numb and blind to our basic instincts of survival
Toilet paper will be a luxury one day
Most will be crying in the bushes as they wipe their *** with poison ivy
Uneducated. Barely skilled. Their media sources corrupt.
I'll be in the woods hunting deer and building shelter
**I'd rather be dead than not free
Wanderer Nov 2012
She's got heavy rain boots stomping
Silk pagado parasol soaking up the shadows
Leaving all her hard angles edged in mist
Behind her black sunglasses you see no sorrow in her eyes
As her pouting lips wrap around a good bye
She's a walk away with a heart full of metal
Twisted and rusted, she'll ruin you too
Midwestern skies always seem to be teary
A day and a night  suffocating under the bleak drowned and dreary
Tomorrow won't feel a thing like Thursday
Blues filtered underwater dreams of escape
Trapped in here
Trapped in here with every dark desire
Eating through her iron heart
Steel ribcage cannot protect from corrosion
Wasting precious time searching for an end
When all she had to do was start to begin
Oct 2012 · 542
Ghost Sweats
Wanderer Oct 2012
Open palms red and sore from ringing
Grandfather clock ticking away down my hopes for tomorrow
I toss and turn all night dreaming black ink bleeding  along the edges of my aching,  submersed mind 
Where were you when my hands were tied?
My mouth sewn shut against their ignorance 
Always another ribbon to cut
A line to cross
When you are ready to wake up and see, actually focus
On the here and now
I'll be here to show you that we are ALL born free
One at time with not just the blood of war on our hands
But stars of wonder in our eyes
Aug 2012 · 1.5k
If I Were A Pirate...
Wanderer Aug 2012
Constantly dipping through gray and black
Wraith like and silent, slipping through undetected
I, Captain Shadow, stand guard at the wheel
Inky hair liquid alive around my shoulders
Whispers back and forth through the mist
Shady Lady glides easily through calm waters
No light penetrates her hull
***** and women a plenty to plunder
But it's knowledge this captain seeks
Traveling the world over for barnacled secrets
Treasures that spark the mind and illuminate the darkness
A bottle of rot gut fits comfortably in my rough hands
Reinforcing sailor's spines grown weary
They all said a woman belonged on land
I ****** in their ale cups
Jumped my rails and set sail
A cold fire in my heart
Weaving through shadows into the night
*Come play in the dark
Wanderer Aug 2012
Through the eyes of heathens
Dancing altars made of poppies and ash
Coat jaded tongues in bittersweet memory
We are eternal yet our spark is on the verge of annihilation
Government needs a turnicate
Big heads bloated, filled with ego
Defiled our homeland
Seemingly snuffing forever the bright flame of freedom
A sea of distraught bodies marching onward into the night
Their chants of "HELL NO TO GMO" crescendoing as it passes by into the packed square
Those in power so easily comforted by their AKs and steel walls
Dia de Los Muertos masks hide determination
As the bombs ignite setting fire to the sky
Comprehension of our purpose is realized
We are not here to ask nicely
We will not be obedient to our peers as masters
Behind our smiling sugar skull masks
**We grin as they burn
Wanderer Aug 2012
I would like to feel again
Burst abruptly from this cocoon of numbness I find myself in
Ice Queen.
Eskimo ***** is mighty cold or so I've been told
Lucky me no Inuit runs through these punch drunk crazy veins
The taste of blood, copper and meaty, is sharp on bitten lips
The facade of laughter, worry
The years that stand between us
Are held up for scrutiny
You are always lacking
I am always wanting
It is our way
Now I find us at a crossroads
Another path blossoms thick and heavy with unkempt erotica
Dripping silky sweet between the sheets
It is one I will walk alone, living sin
Our path is ripe and full
Surprises swinging around every corner
My every desire obtained
Going to sleep lonely but repeat
Such is the choice of a woman
Or is it?
Jul 2012 · 1.2k
Melodious Intensity
Wanderer Jul 2012
Your words to me are like music
Singing through my flesh with savage pounding intensity
Machine gun metal grating against dead nerves
Making me feel
Bringing me alive
Opening my eyes
To all the rotting visceral pain of the world
You consume me 
Twisting turning yearning and burning thoughts
Broken.
Weak and open to the heated weight of your gaze
I sway into the bass line
Entranced
Veins bloated, full of liquid want 
Racing wild through my senses
Come closer with those playing fingers
I want to feel you 
Feeling me heavy with saturated desire
Igniting the night with the wet want you inspire
Jul 2012 · 782
Less Capable
Wanderer Jul 2012
Feeling a little like a bruised peach
Still sweet. Still juicy.
But soon I'll make you gag on my decayed flesh
Repetitious onslaught of daily drudgery leaves me hollow, tender
Used
Dawn bleeds into twilight, another one bites the dusk
Left alone with my thoughts and the far away rooting of night creatures
The darkness is an engulfing cave
My rampant desire to create is a halocline
Salt water day dreams meshing smoothly with fresh water nightmares
Hard to distinguish between the two
I'm sad you are gone
Tears fell for your fall
I cannot strong arm you into a game of pong or light a smoke
But I can sing into the silence hoping the melody helps fill your void
Static is a constant background
I've never treaded water of this depth in some time
My arms getting tired, legs sore
I look to you for comfort and realize you are already sinking
Where's the point when I decide who to save
Or do I too slip below the surface?
Wanderer Jul 2012
Waking up startled, to battering wind and rain.
Tide marks surging to great gasping heights.
Catching breaths stolen by the wind.
Ashes to ashes and dust to dust.
Watching idly by while pieces of you dissolve into the shadows.
I want those clouds weaving through my fingertips.
Their curious renderings like powdered ***** sugar.
Taste it and they fall heavy with gloom like **** death in the aftermath of such storm.

Counting the miles to the storm.
Ticking, tocking, and clicking.
The clock waiting in anticipation for the next thunderous sound.
Cold shivers up my spine like a thousand Carolina insults.
Your ghost still haunts and seeps into my pores lastly at night.
I taste defeat in the way you love.
It's like weaving clouds between my fingertips
Trying to grasp and hold onto every flowing motion of you pulling away from me

My cold, cracked walls are surged.
Towered over in their crumbling decay.
I want to taste your rain.
Your lips gently sink into mine.
Crushed velvet smooth and warm waking up the army of dead hearts ready for battle.
I am no warrior but there's blood painted across my sky.
Red sky in the morning, sailors warning, as I float on out into your turbulent seas.
Looking back on shore I realize that I'm finally home.

These seas roll uneasy.
Queasy.
Watching thru the mist towards our lighthouse that guided us to these depths
Trembling away like an afterthought.
The land has disappeared into the mouth of the shark.
Digested in the belly of a whale of angels.
Our sorrow holds us here, anchoring us to the tumultuous waves.
We battle our sea sickness with kisses of death lingering.
The soft pull of our exile turned oblivion.

Navigating with open wounds the silky expanse of midnight unwinding above us, within us.
Knowing us through and through.
An island of quivering vulnerability breaks the static horizon.
Lights, smog beginning to choke the sea air in my lungs.
Too long you've been left unkempt, grown comfortable.
That will change with new currents,
North winds bringing the frigid breath of winter.

Licking the sun off of the salty expanse of our sunburned red flesh.
The ****** of desperation lingers thru our moaning fingers
Feeling and pleading for our SOS call to be heard by anyone’s ears but ours.
The shores of this icy water leave my mind beneath the dredges of polar sleep.
We've grown strained, frost bitten, and distant in the few feet we are able to part.
The growling of hunger satiates our parched thirst.

I am rendered speechless adrift without you.
Hurricanes a coming.
Stand fast.
Secure the riggings.
Solaris brightens to light the way into calmer seas.
Those tepid shores of wonder and new beginnings fade into the horizon.
It's just you and me left to face the swelling tide.
Hang on.
The water is rising.
No one left to pull us saturated and insatiable from these waters of shadow and secrets.

The siren's song will bring us to our sharp shore end.
Resist the silky flow of nocturnal snakes wrapped around chilled flesh
Pulling closer to our aquatic hearts.
Hades and Persephone bond.
Glowing abysmal rage.
Holy grail veins.
Bleeding back into the orange crush dawn.
Night gives way to hollow rebirth
But once again we are inside one another.
Infinite.

These waves crash on overboard.
Trying to drag us back into the frigid depths with each ebb and flow.
With each crash of wave I can feel our resolve growing weaker.
The sensation of just letting go and giving in.
Should we let go and just give in?
Leave ourselves at the mercy of shipwrecks.
This hurricane dance we've perfected on the endless depthless ocean
Left us weak and willing to pull ourselves apart.
To taste our insides on the outsides.
How many times I've wondered have you noticed my stare.
The lustful licking of my sun blistered lips.
I want to taste the way you think and feel the warmth of your life to keep me alive.
The oceans call, I have heard, brings out the worst in sailors.
Always searching for the elusive siren to sing us a song.
A song from the depths of mythology to lullaby us away from our status adrift.

Our bodies collide in the tide once more.
Salted skin heated and torn
Latching on to something greater than just depths of starless prose.
You were a wicker man, weaved strong and whole.
I was a water girl, slipping straight through your bowl.
Wishes flow to and fro on tepid air laced with promises.
Our fingertips will never lose grip again,
the melody writhing between us like staccato heartbeats
Seeking solace on the endless seas.*

These waves rock us to shoreline.
Rock strewn and littered with the ribcages of whales
And the bows and sterns of shipwrecks long ago.
We pick up these pieces and hold them closest to our chest
Realizing the possibilities of a new home and a new start to this oceanic life we've drifted into.
We build a fire to warm our hearts and suspend our thoughts
Cradled and nestled in the crook of each others arms we leave our sea and our island
Soaring high into the clouds and the sleep we’ve begged for with our parched lips and swollen tongues.
Our dreams at night are the call of the sea begging to be drowned in our sand encrusted lungs,
To be one with us and our failures
The bequeathing cry of the seagull wakes us dully from our slumber
We peer out with sea salted eyes and realize it was all just a dream
We shout for help with all the voice we can muster
Letting in lungs full of icy ocean and dead crustaceans
Filling our bodies like bags of sand immobile
We’ve been sleeping with our anchors held closely
Down in the depths of the endless ocean rolling.
Plain text BK Barnes
Italicised text Brook Ilges
Jul 2012 · 1.5k
Sea Witch
Wanderer Jul 2012
Burn me up
Burn me down
I feel like all I ever do is drown


Concave throat straining against acidic salt water sizzle
Ghost swim in my vision
Ethereal and non-committed, I'll never break through
An anvil weighs heavy on an already heaving chest
My struggles won't last long now
Great depths are unforgiving, waves barrel and crash above me
I can see stripes of sunlight cutting through murky layers of gray and blue
Pieces of wrEckage descend around me but nothing to latch on to
Spreading blackness like octopus ink converts knowledge to fear
Fluttering response  of muscle, I no longer have the strength to fight
Numb. Unconscious.
Floating softly to the ocean floor
*Where I will be part of you always
Wanderer Jul 2012
She sits on the sidelines
Outlined by shadow and smoke
Her curling p's and q's go unnoticed
Watching him wallow in darkness
Persephone and Hades comes to mind
Although in reverse
The ashes of her springtime **** craves the bright burning flame of his 
Unforgiveness
Coming on like a fifth street ******
Red lips and sky high thighs
She's got bad intentions 
His fathomless inkwell craves the sweetness of her embrace
We all aren't built the same she thinks
But she'd let him tap her vein
Violets and stars winking in her vision
His cold touch finally reaches her
Hot skin melting past his reluctant facade
It was all a game he whispers
To get you closer
**To make you mine
Jul 2012 · 484
Summer (mourning) Story
Wanderer Jul 2012
You came by the house last Tuesday
To give your condolences
Seems like everyone knows about the sorry condition of my heart
I was built strong, could hold up under a hurricane
But what do you do with a strong foundation when it's rocked by an earthquake?
My smile told you I was doing ok
Tortured eyes tell you something different
I could see the war on your face, in your ringing hands
Do I stay and sit with her in silence or walk away?
Just because I see in shades of gray does not mean I am blind
To the rich green of deep summer outside my doorway
Give me another week and I'll be fine
Something about my wavering voice tells other wise
Ready to know again the story of the sky and sun
Bringing life back to the dead earth
Awakening again frozen passages of my heart
Jul 2012 · 2.6k
Cold Steel Frame
Wanderer Jul 2012
My hands gently sift through your silky hair
Pulling softly at the base to hear you moan
A shiver tingles down my spine at your purr
I can be impatient
I can be bossy
But you always give in to my urges
Ripping, tearing, biting, *******, a menagerie of ***** slick sweat ****
Bleed for me
What can they not understand about me needing that?
Crimson welling up beneath your ribcage
Only a small slice, small sacrifice to lay at your *** goddess's  feet
Most bring flowers but only you know what I really want
Copper twist rot ****** at the base of your ****
I can only give love once
Broken and bruised you'll never get the same me twice
Reborn matted and patched
Willing to skull stomp them all to come out on top
Triumphant
Bloodied
Sated
Jul 2012 · 515
Well Spring
Wanderer Jul 2012
He had a heart of stone
Strangled by thorn and shadow
Halfway into the night already
Consumed by the need to feed
No spirit could fill him up
Searching for his well spring
Their blood was twisted but destined
A light to keep the age of gods warm
He could sense her close
Summer honey suckle over powering the tang of sea salt love letters
She calls to him from across the sea
His heart answers in mournful melody
The fear of never knowing her touch 
Haunts him well into the dark
Waking fitful and drenched 
Her name a whisper in the blackness on his desperate lips
He wonders if she suffers the way he does
Questing always for clues to her capture
He will find her
No matter how long it takes
No matter how far
*He will find her
Jun 2012 · 856
The Feel of the Fall
Wanderer Jun 2012
Stuck in here with you
Translucent wings pinned down by your gravity as though like butterfly to cork
Under such a watchful gaze I start to tremble
Aroused and impatient beyond relief 
Cinder and smoke snake in the grass
I never stood a chance
You say the only way out is in
The savage call of your lonely heart seducing me
But I am the gate keeper and you are the key
Flush with blood wine, the scent sweet on our mingled breaths
Move closer. I want to feel you 
Eyelids closing softly awaiting the pressure of sure lips
Instead the razor edge of emptiness cuts deep
Open eyes to a dreamscape where you exist
But in the piercing light of day I realize
I am alone
*And you are not sorry
Jun 2012 · 764
Sharp Edge
Wanderer Jun 2012
Picking slowly through the myth and legends
I find it hard to decipher your cobweb caveman tendencies
All of my reserves quiver when you glance at me
Touch is foreign but electric when we chance to graze
Dreams of your sad eyes splash across my night in vivid hazel wonder

I'm not quite there yet.

You cannot hear me over her static
My soft, reluctant waves over powered by the gaudy onslaught of ****
I may know a thing or two about slippery slits and their uses
But mine is sacred, not thrown around
All they want is you
Grinding between running-with-scissor thighs
Pounding their rough and tumble flesh into tenderized shells
Your eyes are empty though, I see
Inside I burn the one for me

You have become dull, your sight jaded
Hard to even relay my hollowed heart's appreciation
Without being cut down for my trouble
Verse hammer and nail will straighten you out
Sharpen once again that quick silver edge of darkness
That I miss
Fell in love with
*Obsess over
Jun 2012 · 2.5k
Insightful Malice
Wanderer Jun 2012
Suppose I was more agreeable
Instead of arguing over coffee about politics, religion
All those subjects deemed taboo that neither of us truly give a **** about
Pressing my point like daggers against your ribcage
Knowing the sweet spots that make you moan
I would give in, applaud your cleverness, then leave for work

You would be left wondering if you should feel insulted.

of course you should

As usual,my filterless memoirs have become vocalized
******* them back in tight and quick is useless
Once freed, the damage is done

But. they. are . just. words.

the previous statement is ridiculous and the author should be shot

Never could I slice you deeper, **** your private mind or lay your soul bare
Then with the bitter, caustic, truthful edge of my observations
You are just as vulnerable as the rest of them
Barbed wire telegrams
Frozen emails
Ash and arsenic letters
Cut you to the quick

Delightful.
But I like it better when I can witness the damage
Basking in the upper handed afterglow of my superior ability to mortally wound
For no bit of silver that I've ever found
Was ever sharper than the razor edge of my tongue
Jun 2012 · 1.3k
Intensity
Wanderer Jun 2012
I used to hang out with subtleness
But she bruised my ego so I stripped her bare
Inviting promiscuity to be my friend instead
Open and easy my smiles come quick
Especially for him
The intensity of his gaze hugged close to my glistening curves
Heavy intentions tempo my movements deep and slow
The dance floor is crowded with seeking bodies
His eyes locked only on me
Devouring
I'm going in for the ****
Licking my lips, him chasing my hips
This is gonna be quick
Major rager tenting his chinos
I want some. Real bad.
His breaking dawn sunset scent making it impossible not to salivate
Closer. Come closer to me.
I am as close as I am going to get
Without falling
Hard. At his feet.
Begging him for just a taste
He doesn't know it yet
I am going to **** him down
Wants it but doesn't know it
I am going to swallow all that juicy ***
Craves it but doesn't know it
He will be the one begging
Begging for more
Gyrating inspired this. Belly dancing to BeatsAntique.
May 2012 · 3.3k
Autobiography
Wanderer May 2012
Regardless of where my life is headed
No matter which wild path it is on
There are always voices that claw their way out
Sadness, Misery,Dripping desire, Torment, Gore...
Live inside of me
I have bubbles in my laughter
Sunshine sky ways in my smile
You'd never know from reading
That I could bake your pants off
Fix your camaro regardless it's issue
And clean your whole house all at the same time
******* operator get you off with her voice kind of love
I make no apologies
Excuses don't dwell here
****** poet with a taste for flesh
An open book with banshee hair
The desire for more and more ink endless on my fingertips
May 2012 · 657
Almost Undamaged
Wanderer May 2012
Goodbye hung on my lips like frost
Bitten and heavy with numb intent
I've never felt such affection towards the disease of sadness

But it must be done

We have drifted, unable to moor ourselves once more
Wishing it could have been different
Is like having bees with no flowers
Useless
I know I come off cold
My eyes flat and devoid of emotion
This is the way it must be
Your tears flooded my better judgement
A lone sparkle sneaking beneath my eyelids to slide down my tired cheek
This is about as clean as I could make it
You may not know how vulnerable I feel
Raw. Rebirthed.
As I turned to walk away I realized
You must not have seen the stitches on my chest
That are holding together the lonely cavity that once held
My **heart
May 2012 · 388
Love Hurts
Wanderer May 2012
Sometimes a song will come on
I will catch the scent  of your cologne
Takes me back to a summer where I went wild
Letting my mouth run free in the breeze

I smiled only for you
Young veins brimming with life
Pounding heart racing beside you in the July darkness
Your bright stars dancing around my thoughts

We did not get along the way we thought we would
A tempest instead of a love storm
Broken, forlorn I continued on alone
I still remember that ache
May 2012 · 660
Advice
Wanderer May 2012
Don't ever tell a woman to calm down.
May 2012 · 1.0k
Forbidden
Wanderer May 2012
Our gazes meet
Sizzle
Alone in a sea of people
My pulse picks up
Pure. Liquid. Intensity.
*****. **** me hard promises in a heated exchange
My sparkling laughter attracts your attention
You want it
I bite my lips through conversation
Knowing you can taste me on the air
Feeling your eyes burn into mine
Tingles race up my spine
You set me on fire
Weaving slow through the crowd
Herding me into a corner of shadows
Soft curves fill your palms
Fitting perfectly
Hot, urgent breath on my neck
"Give into me"
Pushing your throbbing length against my tender flesh
You drive me crazy
But I am a monster
Taking and breaking wherever I go
Just when our mouths touch
Already panting into the air between us
I start to fade into your memory
The unattainable
Always just out of reach
May 2012 · 618
Surrender-Is-Not-An-Option
Wanderer May 2012
Sirens go off in my head
You stand before me once again
My thoughts racing, bright
I'm not the woman you used to know
Tripped and bruised under all these smiles
But you are counting on all of your old tricks
To make this go your way

You have another thing coming.

We both know I could rip you to pieces
While doing my nails
Your supposed charm and talent mesmerize
Those that cannot see through the ******* you have so neatly wrapped yourself in
*******
I am not easy sport, hanging off every word
May have been once
The romantic stars of believing everything you said dancing in my eyes
But I cannot see their flirting, winking lights this night
Instead your happiness soon turned to comfort
Discarded.
Leaving me empty and enraged
May 2012 · 457
Winter Disorder
Wanderer May 2012
She ruffles her Phoenix feathers
Flames dance and lick off the edge of her salamander tongue
She may be made of sugar
But she won't melt
Born a J
               A
                   N
                      U
                         A
                            R
                               Y girl with snow storm tendencies
Her winter eyes radiate with knowledge
That the stars above sparkle only for her
Set into the sky by the jealous night
Not to be out done by the hypnotic w
                                                              a­
                                                            r
  ­                                                       m
                                                        t
     ­                                                 h of the  sun's rays
Only the moon truly holds her schizophrenic heart
Her soul, full of zeal, stretches to accommodate all she holds dear
Hoping one day

                                Maybe

She may burn a place clear for you
Wanderer May 2012
You didn't surprise me, you upset me
My defenses laid bare at your assault
I have never ached so deep for someone's touch
The jagged edge of my merciless memory festers
Wallowing.
My fingertips sore from constant busy work
I'd rather be quiet and useful
Than obvious and numb
A fine line between the two
Raw. Undone.
I scream until my throat gives out
Better to focus on that pain
For your loss has left me gasping for air
Searching violently for the unraveling end
I just thought we were stronger than that
On my knees before you
Confessing all my sins
Unhinged.
May 2012 · 529
Opening Blue
Wanderer May 2012
The split hit us hard like an ice avalanche
Both spinning off in opposite directions
I can still see her when I close my eyes
Smell her soft sleepy scent on my pillows
Heartsick. Complacent. Numb.
Did not wake up easy today
Dreams,my only reprieve, remain obscure
Trying to put thoughts together but I feel nothing
Emptiness consumes the weak willed
Hoping she is stronger than this
Knowing that I am not
Walls closing in on already cramped quarters
Lonely. Everything reminds me.
I ache to tell her how I feel
Tongue tied writer's block opacifying malignant thinking
Unraveling. Come undone.
I am not who she thinks
Just trapped in here. Prisoner.
My expressionary boundaries solid as my convictions
Steel. Concrete.
May 2012 · 851
Fatal Attraction
Wanderer May 2012
The heavy weight of his gaze penetrated the darkness
More aware of him now than ever before
Something has changed
Been following her for years starting as a child
Picking wild flowers at dusk
She could feel his hunger as it swept over her
Primordial awareness
Her breath hitches, throat dry, tongue swollen
Say something
She needed to know what to do
Closer to her now
Shuffling across cool wood floor
His eyes are a black pit, colorless
Whether rage or lust fuels him she cannot tell
Nostrils flaring, cheeks flushed
She is unsure
A bead of sweat slides down between her shoulder blades
His pupils contracted slightly as though it registered
True fear crowds her prominent thoughts
Lust.
Some sorcery has ensnared him, erratic
His canines visibly lengthen
I cannot wait to taste you. Dripping honey sweet his whisper slashes
She knew she was in trouble when she felt her secret flesh moisten
She inhaled sharply feeling  his earthy scent saturate every cell
Gliding palms skim softly across her pale chest up around the silky curve of her throat
She has waited for him to claim her for years
Slipping through the darkness
Always watching
No longer.
May 2012 · 969
Affliction Haiku
Wanderer May 2012
My heart feels sick
For the disease growing be-
tween us pulling soft
May 2012 · 1.0k
Starting Over
Wanderer May 2012
Letters roamed back and forth
Smelling strongly of desire and sadness
Traces of it remain clinging to their worn edges
Permanent black marker scroll dancing across lines
Waltzing seductively through my dreams
Pens slowed, life moving in, our choices setting adrift
The chaotic rhythm of our hearts
I cannot stay here settles on trembling lips
I have never said good-bye before, it was always See you later
With burning eyes and a lump in my throat I fade away
The last warthm in your eyes chilling as my hand slips from yours
So this is what it is like to crash land
Colors speeding past you in a rush of skydive adrenaline
Taking up the void that remained from your leaving
I will not condemn your freedom but ask in return that you accept
My Phoenix flame setting the night sky ablaze
May 2012 · 714
Insomniac Haiku
Wanderer May 2012
Sleep remains just out
Of my fingertip's reach so
I conjure haikus
May 2012 · 825
I Would Rather Swim
Wanderer May 2012
Tangled and mangled
Earth's once pliable green skeleton
Is now just twisted cold steel bones
Reflecting our chemically induced ego trip
Into the heaven's judging eyes
I am no mechanic but I do engineer
We cannot go on like this forever
Crippling muscle and thoughts ability to bend
Until we can do naught but fracture and break
Where is the drawn line?
Must have used chalk
Must have washed away in one of those bailout floods
Politicians always have a boat waiting for them
Smacking civilian heads as they paddle along
But their blind eyes will not be shown mercy
From the ravaging wild fire they started
Only those of us who can swim will be safe
May 2012 · 886
Dream: Fields of Water
Wanderer May 2012
A crimson muddy ravine is marked on both sides by
massive cliffs towering over the precession below. A figure wrapped
in white muslin and rubbed with ash  is propped up on a stone altar. Around the figure
tribesman and women dance hard, their eyes wild, their curled fingers wicked.
The figure is not touched by the dancers almost as if he is diseased. I realize
at this point that that is exactly what is going on. A plague has swept through this
tribe and killed many. They burn the bodies on these altars to appease the gods
and to beg mercy. The dripping fat and flesh pools in the mud below, making a small trickle of filth that led to near by water. Down river from this tribe is a whole different world. Here instead of being dark
skinned the people are very pale. All of their houses are remains from shipwrecks
put up into trees and connected by rope bridges, hammocks and twisting vines. Below the fields are
covered with water. Below the surface was their crops. Melons, lettuces, berries, peppers all kinds of
earth like flora but every species glowed softly with a pulsing beat. The pale tribe was very careful walking through the lines while harvesting. One rough handling could ruin the whole crop. A sense of fear was here all of the people smelled strongly of it. I could still hear the drum beat of the sick tribe. All work stopped and slowly everyone turned to look at me. Just then a loud crackling sound shot through the sky. A bolt of lightening struck close. Gasps could be heard all around. I looked quickly at my feet in the fields of water and didn't see the glow. The fields were black. The pale faces around me sunk in, gaunt and hungry. Their mouths worked but I could not hear them. My vision went blurry then black, fading away from their struggle.
May 2012 · 2.0k
Bystander
Wanderer May 2012
He woke up bathed in moonshine
Sleepy Appalachian mountain eyes
Fading autumn honey liquid gold
Into the white background noise of reality
He always did have one foot in, one foot out
A ghost to those that he let see
Physical boundaries ignored, retired
Weary bones begged him to slip back into the comfort of oblivion
But for him sleep was ever elusive, a tease

Racing over lush valleys, dead seas and fertile plains
His thoughts are boundless
Synthesizing emotional code into poetic expression
He must pull it all together somehow
Beats and rhythms sparkle off the edge of his perception
They rarely paused long enough to remember
But he always did

Calloused hands prove a life of grunt work
His dreams had been so much more complex
Weaving through the atmosphere, linking fully with the cosmos
Lines whisper across his flesh
Roadmaps
****** and impulsive
Sensitively attuned to the pulsing energy around him
Shaping it into flourished verse

He is the sun
I merely the **moon
May 2012 · 2.1k
Aplastic Anemia
Wanderer May 2012
A voracious beast devours my Husband
Distraught and upset I must put on a strong face for him
Every day I watch him grow paler and more thin
At night my dreams are consumed with needles, prescriptions
IV tubing and bad food swirl in the mix
In his eyes I see an exhausted spirit on the edge
The need to protect is a driving force within me
Hospitals should be more sterile
HE HAS A ******* FAILURE OF THE BONE MARROW PEOPLE
The next school of medicine reject who doesn't wash their hands
Will have them cheerily  burned off...by me
On the inside I seeth and cry, throw a child's tantrum on the floor
Unfair does not even begin to describe the pain he has endured
Some would say to let him go, *******
They just do not know us
For my exterior is made up of stone
Supported by a frame of steel
I will never give up
We have a will of iron
A malignancy has no control over our strength
Into the coming war of medical procedures we are defiant
Strong and Worthy
We will never give up
May 2012 · 544
Pulse Haiku
Wanderer May 2012
Unable to purge
My thoughts of throbbing, thick *****
Penetrating me
May 2012 · 1.9k
StarChild
Wanderer May 2012
I do not feel myself today
Stolen stunned sparkle sunned
Crystallizing adrenaline ***** hypertension maniac
Overwhelming in here. Crowded.
Always willing to be the first to jump
Potent love affairs with rushing wind and endless heights
Break apart.
Come undone.
Let go.
More surreal than tangible
Fading softly into the mist of kilauea
Great fire mother blessing me with the burning
Ablaze, a Phoenix from the flames, rising into the night
Bursting all over the constellations, adhering to the cosmos
Third eye open
Awed.
Amazed.
May 2012 · 816
Stella
Wanderer May 2012
She enjoys being a little more than a handful
Bright and brilliant in ways most only dream about
Attaining a sense of mystery with added wonder
That is all her own
Dripping wet velvet verse
*** on stilts
Never learning how to turn it down
Or if she even had the ability
No, her talents did not lay in the realm of constraint
But in that of the exotic, obnoxious, aroused and uninhibited
She never met a soul she could not charm
Or one that she could not ******
Cracking open their fragile shells like oysters
Flooding them with compliments
Softening their regard
Then quickly slurping out their mettle with a talented tongue
She will leave you weak kneed
Your mouth wet and dry at the same time
Unable to make up its mine
Whispering her name as you are left staring after her
Breathing deeply of the cloud of her perfume
In her eyes you thought  you saw heaven
In her smile you know you saw hell
May 2012 · 857
(P)(o)t(e)n(t)ial
Wanderer May 2012
We are our addictions
If not we wouldn't be willing to
Bleed so quick
On an endless search to find like minded companies
When we are successful we dig in
Casting out whitty barb edged hooks
Exotic, ****** verse to shock and ensnare
I can feel yours just as easily as I feel myself sinking into you
Our chaotic experience of the waking world
Leaked out on paper, line after scathing line
Consume. Saturate. Devour. Paralyze.
We soak up the mysteries.
The miseries.
And everything in between
Sharing and tearing
Scaring and airing
Naked. Open. Bare.
Our soul fire burns up quick and bright like coal
The smoke often just as *****
Eclipsing preconceived notions
You know nothing of our dark pleasures
Aching secrets that have us wandering into the night
In search of something.
Thousands of words but never enough
Always searching for something
Our indulgences outweigh your pride
We will air your laundry too, uncaring
Just enough to shame and cower
Our only vulnerability is our inability to succeed from our talents
For it is only in death that we find **immortality
May 2012 · 771
Echoing Transition
Wanderer May 2012
How could you affect me still?
Even these pages cannot forget
Outlines of shadows staining their surface
Soaking up your soft, fading scents of cemeteries and midnight walks
Haunting my dreams, driving me mad
With wanting the unattainable
I lick parched lips from a desert mouth
Tasting salt and sand
Unable to erradicate the memory of your teeth
Penetrating. Every. Thought.
Lush and violent retaliation lashes through me
How could I abstain?
To heady of a high to not fully submerge myself
In the black ,depthless veil just before dawn
Pulling me under, deep, just like you
Alone.
Just like you
May 2012 · 620
Mother Oak
Wanderer May 2012
You sit patiently at my feet
Humming earth vibrations lulling you to sleep
Your fragile warmth sinks into me
My soil cradles your cosmic divinity
Sharing the soft breeze of a June afternoon
Knowing you'll leave me all too soon
Wishing it could be different, our paths more whole
Growing like root trees out of the same fold
I will stay here growing while you go away
Waiting as night falls for another sunshine filled day
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