i came
i saw
i conquered
...myself

left in the realm of memories
by the ones you love,
the ones saying they love you
the ones who
you've let in,
all who
are allowed to
get close to you,
come push and shove,
will abandon you
right on cue
that's my lesson
that's where i'm constantly tested
i pray it's different for you

i wanted you like a Pepsi
just one Pepsi
not quite suicidal
but watch me display tendencies

there's no monster under the bed
or in the closet
it's all in your head
and you'll never conquer it

i

hit

forty

two

and

still

you

will

find

me

trying

to

­find

who

i

am

amidst

the

rubble

of

my

foundationless

residence

a

­temple

turned

unlivable

domain

a

destiny

attached

to

my

­DNA

that's

attached

to

my

name

why
AAHHHHHHH!
am i
AAAHHHHHHHH!
still here?
AAAAHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
...
oh right
...
i succumb to fear

i could teach a master class
on what to say
and what to do
and what they want to hear
but i couldn't tell you
who i am
or why i am
or why there's so much fear