Bellie-boo

Bellie-boo Dec 2015

Days walking away,
Kisses feel desire,
Cars pull endings,
Lungs fear death,
Anew pulse halts,
Civilization titers distance,
Scripts knife rhythms,
Anxiety faces silence,
Tomorrow mirrors endless waterfalls,
Apologies intertwine awful choices and flawless heavens,
We protect reasons,
Yet stain morals,
Ice told passing nearly fearing its spacious momentary dive into choking rhymes,
Than loses sparkling depth,
No meaning and the journey loses its gleam.

I went into the words section on my page and copied and pasted a whole bunch of words I have written in other poems in a random order to make a poem. Although it is not great quality it was really fun and made me think about the meaning behind the fragments as a whole. It was a great exercise suggested by a friend and I am suggesting this to you.

#randomword #rearanged

Bellie-boo Dec 2015

Practices are my Dates

I am on a date in this vast lake,
Every breath a kiss that lingers on my lips and lifts my lungs,
The weight of our time crashes into my hips,
The only positions I a familiar to,
Are butterflies and front crawl,
Laying my back,
The water surrounds me,
Pushing forwards,
Trying to break through.
I mount my block,
prepare to leap,
Spring forth,
Diving into the deep,
Water rushes in surrounding,
These moaning pleas for wind.
Sweat diluted in ecstasy,
Nanoseconds my eternity,
Adrenaline coursing through me,
I claw the crystal skin resting calmly,
A surface,
This is me breaking free.
Practices are my dates,
Water is my lover,
Technique our passion,
Winning my partner.

#swimming

Bellie-boo Dec 2015

Far beneath this sea of my own unforthcoming

Far beneath the sea,
I just want to be,
Terrified what I'll see,
Latent depth within my dreams,
I want to be,
I want to be...

Far beneath the sea,
I've fallen down,
Into this empty animosity,
Fearing what will come to be,
Depravity,
Depravity...

Far beneath the sea,
Single versus surfacing,
Foam now fills my being,
With endless enormity,
That is me,
That is me...

This is me,
This is me,
You will see,
Falling far beneath the sea.

Swooned by illicit felonies,
Abducted by my abomination's abnormities,
Collared by society,
Atrocity they make of my ideology,
Smutted is my impropriety to immorality,
Seams sewn from blasphemy,
Forming waves uncontrollably,
Capsizing my reality,
Aboard this shipwrecked audacity.

Far beneath the sea,
I want to be,
Growing cold gradually,
Drifting towards eternity,
Immaturity my morality,
Prodigy my immaturity.

Far beneath the sea,
Wishing to be free,
Crushed by pressure set onto me,
Breathless counting,
Breath unconvincing...

Far beneath the sea,
I want to be,
Swallowing my passing,
Choking on my obituary,
Stifling mortal ability,
In this sea,
Of my own unforthcoming...

Far beneath the sea,
I want to be,
Left lonely,
Lonely,
Lone as me.

I wrote this while listening to Seether's "Rise above this," therefore it may be nice to read while listening to it because it has the same type rhythm/flow.

Bellie-boo Dec 2015

Eternally pinning for You

Creating my own misery,
As I watch over you,
Others give me their empathy,
For loving you,
I want this to end justly,
But everytime I think we are through,
Your smile sends me into ecstasy,
And I keep on loveing you,
This peace is insanity,
Respond, please, give me a clue,
Take your time, I will wait an eturnity,
For you.

Bellie-boo Dec 2015

86 mph and my pulse fractures.

Racing down the highway,
My breath beings to shallow,
86 mph I know my way,
The bends and curves no longer lead to tomorrow,
It's hard to breath as I sway,

I want to hit a tree,
I want to be free.

Racing past feelings that are astray,
My momentary marrow slowly begins to hallow,
86 my life's exponential decay,
The end rests in my sorrow,
It's this mindset that can no longer stay,

I want to hit a tree,
I want to be free.

Racing to call bay,
My pulse fractures with the swoons of a cello,
86 times I will be told it's okay,
It's this that is my hero,

I want to hit a tree,
I want to be free.

Racing towards the tree's way,
My attempt a pseudo,
86...87...88...I count until I am just okay,
It's the concerto which ends my throe,

*I do not hit that tree,
I am free,
I and death divorcées.

Bellie-boo Dec 2015

I'm not really good at poetry though,

Yet here I go...
To put on a show,
In these stanzas' rhymes I will stow,
Creating this laminar flow,
Stringing words together to form a sentence like an archipelago,
Needing this poem like bread dough,
Although I know it will never become a gateau,
Nor a chocolate Bordeaux,
It is more akin to a cheapo combo,
Housing poultry clauses building a bordello,
Impertinent this may seem like loving a guanaco,
But what you will learn from this puppet show,
*Is that not all poems have to rhyme,
In order to flow.

It does not take a rhyme master to navigate the scriptures of poetry. Poetry is not one set rubric for one to fill in for if it was all poems would sound the same, which they do not. Therefore do not say you are terribly bad at poetry, instead find your style, or create your own, and fill it with your voice.

Bellie-boo Dec 2015

...The Harder It Becomes.

The further she strides from me,
the stronger my desire to die becomes.
The further she cares for me,
the stronger my regret becomes.
The further she leaves me,
the stronger I welcome my knife into my lungs.

The more I want to die,
The more I consider her,
The more I think of her,
The more I want to live.

The further she is from me,
the stronger my feelings of harm becomes.
The further she distances from me,
the stronger my loneliness becomes,
The further she thinks of my,
the stronger my guilt becomes.

For if I die,
How long will she cry?
Will she believe it a lie?
She will want to die,
I pray this falsify.

The further she strides from me,
the stronger my desire to die becomes.
The further she cares for me,
the stronger my regret becomes.
The further she leaves me,
the stronger I welcome my knife into my lungs.

The more I want to die,
The closer she draws to me,
The closer she is to me,
The less I want to die.

The further she is from me,
the stronger my crave for she becomes.
The further she delves into me,
the stronger my desire to breath becomes.
The further she surrounds me,
the stronger my will becomes.

Because,
I wake for her,
I dress for her,
I run for her,
I eat for her,
I breath for her,
I sing for her,
I live for her.
*But the further she walks away from me...

#thanks #fightingdepression #onestepatime #loveu2