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Bellie-boo Nov 2015
When I say I am through
Loving you
You smile and I love you anew.

You are so kind and too easy to hug,
Pulling me into your embrace nice and snug,
I try to leave my love for you under a rug,
I walk away from you trying to shadow my blush with a shrug.

The nape of your neck peeking from beneath your collar,
You have instantly turned me a follower,
When I sleep with you I am always  gentler.

But as you drifted away from me,
I became ridden with fear,
And it was then clear,
That you would flee,
To forever be free,
Of me.

So I packed myself up and left town,
Determined this crazy path of love I would not go down,
Yet on my journey I was found,
By your love making me the clown,
To wear alone this frown,
You are my princesses a sparkling crown,
Now we are lovers bound.

Because,
When I saw I am through
loving you
You smile and I love you anew.
Thank you for allowing me to love you<3
Bellie-boo Apr 2015
"Everyone's expecting so much of you"

Crumpling under the pressure I know not what to do

"You'll be the best, we all know it"

Sinking feelings form in my pit

"Come on that's your cue"

******* in breath I tap the stage with my shoe

"Sing girl, make them submit"

Opening my lungs my song fills the room, it is a tight fit

"What a lovely coo"

"You have got it girl, you really do"

"Amazing, just keep doing you"

They liked it?

"You are a gift, never quit"

Thank you, Thank you

For lifting my pascal, it is about time I flew
Pascal is a unit of pressure
Bellie-boo Sep 2014
What if I just want to sit here. Then what would you do?

I'd let you sit there as I read to you,
as I sang to you,
as I declared I love you.
I'd let you be where you are,
if you never leave I'll never have to share you with anyone.

What If I didn't want you?

I wouldn't give you a choice,
and since you are never moving from that spot I don't think it'd be hard to stay by your side.
I'd profess my love for you every day till your body adapted to me
and you couldn't live without my being beside you.
I would make you need me so there would be no doubt
weather or not if you wanted me.
You would need me at that point.

What if I hated you?

I would spend every day of the rest of my life atoning for my sin,
I would pray to hear your sweet voice again.
I would beg you to not make me leave your side
and I'd hope,
nay pray that you would someday forgive me.
I would show you every day that I love you
and that I know what I did was wrong.
I'd prove to you that I would never make you hate me again.

What if I  didn't want to be loved?

Well then I do not know what I would do for I love you so much that I do not think it can be disguised.
I highly doubt that I could conceal my feelings for you any more then I already do.

'Already do?' . . . . You do not hide your feelings though.

Oh, but I do.
If you knew the true extend of my feelings for you I do not think you would allow me to look at you; You would no longer let me by your side for fear of what I may do to you.
I if you knew my feelings for you are not a pure as you may innocently believe you would never let me see you again.
Yes, I feel love and passion for you.
I care for you immensely and want to protect you.
I want to  keep you all to my self,
lock you up far away from anything that would abstract your vision from me.
I want to hold you tight in my arms till you die there,
never thinking about another but me.
I want you to crawl to me whenever something troubles you
and beg for my console,
which I would always gladly give you.
I want you to think of me as your solution for everything.
I never want to let you out of the house for I'm scarred of what might happen to you.
I feel anxious when you are not around.
I am extremely jealous of everyone around you.
I want to destroy you to eat you whole,
yet I want to love you.
I want to keep you my prisoner and never liberate you.
I know it's wrong but I want you all to myself.
I'm disgusting,
I know.

What if I said I was also 'disgusting.'
What if I said I also never wanted to let you go,
that I also want to hold you in my arms till you die.
Keep you with me at all times.
What if I said I would never give you up even if you begged
and screamed you hated me?
Would you think I am selfish?

No, you could never be selfish. Especially when that is what I want as well.

What if I said I loved you?

I would respond with Loved? Then I would kiss you and say
"I love you."

What if I said I love you?

*[Kiss]
Bellie-boo Sep 2014
I'm staying up late,
dancing with strangers.

He's staying at home,
cooking a meal.

I don't go home,
there are no meals for me there.

His family host picnics and game nights,
he can't image any where else.

I only host if they pay,
I can't go home with nothing.

He goes to school early,
studying away.

I arrive but an hour late,
with the breath of a cigarette on my teeth.

He makes good grades,
and plays all the sports.

I sleep all day,
and get high in the bathrooms.

His parents are doctors,
his brother is at Harvard.

My dad's on unemployment,
my mother ran away.

He works at McDonald's on the week ends,
Daddy said he didn't have to but he insisted.

I work all night,
and have a part time in the morning.

He wakes up at ten,
then goes to his job for an hour or so.

In the afternoon I watch him at work,
My hair's a mess and heels are in my hand.

He smiles at everyone,
whether in school, work, or home he's always happy.

I smile at creeps,
never happy when you live from day to day from check to check.

He has movie nights,
where his mom makes popcorn.

I lesson to cries and yells,
when my dad drinks himself out.

He chats with his bros,
they play football.

I sooth my little brother and sister asleep,
we pray for a better day to come soon.

At school he takes notes,
he lessons to the teachers.

At school,
when awake I watch him and listen to him speak.

He walked up to me,
"Hey, I've noticed you out a bit."

"You have?"
What is this I think.

"Yeah,"
"I was wondering of you wanted to go to diner or something."

I never dreamed this would happen,
I don't know what to say.

He looks down,
seems kind of nervous.

"I would love to,"
I look into his eyes this has got to be a dream.

He smiles,
"Great! I'll get you at ten."

He's staying up late,
getting ready for his date.

I'm out of the bar,
waiting for his car.

He's out on a date,
she is a lovely girl with a complicated life.

I'm out on a date,
he's my shinning light.

They had a really fun time,
"We should do that again."

"Yeah,"
"We should."

They say 'Goodnight,'
'til tomorrow night.
Since this was a short story I wrote it was REALLY hard to put into poem-ish form therefore I hope it sounds okay:)
Bellie-boo Jun 2014
People like happy ending.
Sometimes life isn't so happy though.
But there are times when your're so extatic that you jitter in your seat.
And there are times so ****** that you could jump out a window.
But always remember the good things to come.
And never wollow in your past.
But do not forget you past because it made you...well, you.
And so embrace all your mistakes to brighten up your days.
People like happy endings.
Sometimes life isn't so happy though.
But if you can remember the happy parts,
And keep a smile on your face...
People like you will have happy endings.
Sometimes some not so happy days but the endings will be the happiest, I promise.
Keep looking up whoever :)
Bellie-boo Jun 2014
At the red light

A light shines red like acrylic on a canvas

All the cars wait behind the snowflake line

the light gives way to green releasing the long line of cars


At the red light

ants are in a row

colorful with four wheels

the lady in the front car, the driver, a mother

in the mirror her children sleep

quiet mice, sound sheep


At the red light

red beams on forever

a silhouette dashes in the distance

death creeps up on the ominous shadow

death shaped with four wheels, chrome hubcaps, and tinted windows


At the red light

one, two, three shots cracks of lightning which stole the shadow’s breath

red blossoms from its chest

fireworks of red

must’ve hurt they said

red crystals sprinkles in a dark cupcake


At the red light

the world turned green apathetic to recent events

and the cars trucked on like camels through the desert


At the red light

the eldest child in the front car saw glistening  in the mirror

her mother’s tear

the cars flew down the highway, away from there, away

At the red light

a girl went on with her mother to live another

and

At that red light

a girl died

blossoming with red birthing death’s red love

she now laid in a bed of crimson petals

At that red light
Bellie-boo Apr 2014
Green spacious land speckled with yellow poppies outstretched for miles on end.

Flowers dance, the wind its puppeteer, as a bee comes hoping some pollen the flower will lend.  

Butterflys weave in and out of crowds, navigators of flight their path only they themselves may they bend.

Red and white checkers lay upon the soft green meadows a cloud of fluff and lace clothe thee, lady friend.

As boys run about holding kites, and racing little toy boats with a little hand written note to send.

Men sit and chat about the news and weather, while the women set upon the house to tend.

Simple means, simple beings are easy to fend.
Not trying to be sexist with the second to last line in any way. That is simply how they would have said it in the 1800's.
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