I am surrounded by people
Everyone staring, waiting
When will the show start
How will it end
Faces gathered around me
Their eyes sparkling with excitement
While I do nothing
I stare back at their gazes
Waiting for them to do something
When will they throw a lifeline
Am I still worth saving


I watch them watching me drown
I was not worth saving

Mad
Angry
Furious

I want rights
The right to be myself
Right to my body and my mind
The justice of being here
My choice
Children
Partners
Who is my family?
The opposition must fall

Sad
Bleek
Death

December nights are different than the rest
In December I lie awake and listen to Christmas songs
In December I lie awake finding presents for my loved ones
In December I lie awake thinking about what I'll cook over the holidays
Why can't every month be December?

I take a pill every night
It dissolves in my stomach
It makes me hurt
Nausea and headaches
Every night
It makes my head better
But my body worse

At two thirty in the night
A strange thing happens
Strange thoughts jump out of your head
They appear in the shape of a little man
He tips his hat to you
Says "how did you do today"
If you reply good he nods and disappears
If you reply bad he stays with you through the night
He tears your life appart and says tomorrow will never come
He disappears in the morning
And comes back every night
At two thirty

Happy perhaps once more
New beginnings for the Earth
Year of renewal

Life is no longer real
It floods over and around me
But never touches me
Days and nights go by
I don't remember them
I'm just numb
There is no pain
No happy either
Just an existence
I exist
Therefore I must think
But there is nothing
To think about
Only a fog
Fogginess in my brain
And everywhere
There is no life
It was always fake

Despite the virus
I hope
You all had a merry Christmas

"Love poems are not my thing"
I said
Before falling in love

You left me many nights ago
To sail around the island's shore
What do I do when flying solo?
Guess it's my fault wanting more

Worried thoughts fill my head
While you're away from land
How do I know you aren't dead
Washed up with the sand

Of course you will return
But while you've been away
My love continued to burn
The ship is now at bay

You are here again at last
Warm and loving smile
Look across the ocean vast
Don't go again for a while?

Laying outside in the freezing cold
No worries I am wearing my whole wardrobe
I'm not cold
I'm looking at a million stars
Dazzling in the pitch black sky
Some brighter, some more hidden
Each one prettier and more mysterious than all the others
When I try to count them I have to stop because simply looking is enough
Why try to count the uncountable?
I'm laying here, in the snow looking at the most wonderful, unique, eye-catching things in the universe
And yet
All I want is for you to lay with me
So we could do it together

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
My world is fantastic,
And so are you.

Orchids are white,
Good stories are rare,
Fire is red,
And so is your hair.

Sunflowers reach,
Up to the skies,
My lover is kind,
And so are your eyes.

Foxgloves in hedges,
Surround the farm,
Keeping it safe,
Just like your arms.

Daisies are pretty,
Tulips have style,
The day is warm,
And so is your smile.

The moonlight is beautiful,
Just like you.

I said I love him
And he said "I love you back"
Life is wonderful

You won't ever see this
Why would you, you don't like poetry
But I have to get this off my chest
I am deeply madly in love with you.
I have been in love with you for a whole year now
And you don't even know it
Because I'm afraid I will lose you if I tell
I'm afraid we'll stop being friends
That I might ruin this thing
By being deeply madly in love with you
Perhaps one day I'll tell you
Or maybe I won't
But in my heart I will always know
That I am deeply madly in love

How are you?
Are you in love too?
It's wonderful isn't it?
I wish you luck

Can't find it either huh?

When I dream I dream of a place.
A place of great wonder and pleasant surprises.
Where everyone is as perfect as the feeling you get when fitting the final piece of a jigsaw puzzle.
Where there is always peace and quiet and love.
So much love.
An endless, perfect, undying love.
That is the place I dream of.
But when I wake up and reality comes flooding back like when water hits a spoon at too great a speed.
That's when I wish I could go back to sleep.
When I wish the whole world had the same dream as I did tonight.
Then maybe we, humankind, could make reality as a dream.
With love.

Masks are good
They keep the plague contained
They keep it away

Masks hide my face
They conceal my emotions
They keep me away

Masks are bad
They stop me breathing
They keep help away

I want to sing but I don't know the notes
I want to run but I don't have legs
I want to cook but I don't have a recipe
I want to have fun but I don't have friends
I want to live but I don't have the will

I feel like my stomach turned to mush
Like my throat is closing and I can't breathe
I hear ringing in my ears but I hardly hear anything except the voice in my head
Telling me things that frighten me to death
I'm trying to sleep but I can't because the only thing I am capable of doing is trying to stay alive

But it's hard

Sunshine on the beach
A beautiful, fair girl skips
portrayed by the queen

There was a young lady called Anne
All the way home she ran
But she never thought
That maybe she ought
To just stay away from the ram

Hello
Can you help me?
Can you help me understand why I feel this way
Why my stomach ties itself in knots and sends strange signals to my brain
Why I get nervous and jittery
Why I blush and blunder
Why I can't stop
Why my mind is crippling me
Why I can't do the things I want to
Why my mind won't stop even though I tell it to
If you could help me it'd be great
Bye

Really

I keep lying
and lying and lying and lying
And when I'm confronted about my lies
I lie more

My life is a lie
I don't tell the truth
Why do people listen
When all I say are lies

A shank, however hard it tries,
Will always be bent.
Down, down, down into the darkness of the dirt covered earth,
Gently it goes - the resolute, the crooked, the unerect.

A hilt, however hard it tries,
Will always be ornamental.
Never forget the decorative and nonfunctional hilts.

Weapons are sharp edges.
Sharp edges are weapons.
Now old is just the thing,
Old blunts the edges

I saw the faint symbol of a generation destroyed,
How I mourned for a dagger.
Does a dagger make you shiver?
Does it?

It's the middle of the night again
And here I am, again
Typing up a poem
Thinking it might make me feel better
And it does

Life is full of ups and downs
Actually it is only ups and downs
I am bipolar

Soft, fluffy pillows
I could easily fall asleep
So I think I will

Crying over spilt milk won't do any good
But licking it off the floor is acceptable

To be a raindrop
Falling out of the grey sky
Hitting the ground hard

Me
Getting out of bed

A poem a day
Keeps the doctors away
They should cure my head

Eyelids so heavy
The sound of snoring
Echos through a house
Back against a mattress
Muscles aching
For a chance to rest
Soon the switch
Will turn off

They say, all good things must end
as I clasp my hands and mourn
as I clasp my hands and weep
loneliness is my only companion

For you may never understand
what you mean to me

How happy is the amused, blank bewilderment!
Blank bewilderment.
Does the blank bewilderment make you shiver?
does it?

The constitutional controversy is not private!
the constitutional controversy is exceptionally private.
Never forget the unexclusive and private constitutional controversy.

Acute annoyance is an obvious effect.
the obvious effect is an acute annoyance.
An acute annoyance is large. an acute annoyance is small-minded,
an acute annoyance is puny, however.

I saw the woolly posture of my generation destroyed,
How I mourned the apparent awkwardness.
An apparent awkwardness is muzzy. an apparent awkwardness is confused,
an apparent awkwardness is a flocculent, however.

I saw the homophobic reaction of my generation destroyed,
How I mourned the bitter backlash.
Does the bitter backlash make you shiver?
does it?

"Crazy, absurd, nothing as it seems"
That's the advertisement for Wonderland
"Wonderland is where the sea meets the mountain
And the cakes melt like ice cream"
Why in the world has Wonderland come to my town?
"You can be happy in Wonderland, why don't you come and visit?"
When Wonderland comes I know to be happy
For when Wonderland comes it comes only to me
"In Wonderland you can be wherever you want to be
Except for home, you can never be home when you're in Wonderland"
Now I know why Wonderland came here
It didn't
My mind made up Wonderland

I don't know what day it is anymore
My dreams have never been wilder
I miss how things were before
When the world wasn't an outsider

Blossom
Frailest, fragrant
Flourishing, thriving, wilting
Ever so pink
Flower

My shiny snake, you inspire me to write.
I hate the way you slither, look and hiss,
Invading my mind day and through the night,
Always dreaming about our first real kiss.

Let me remember where I went astray,
When you turned creepy, clever and awful.
Do you realise just how much evil dismay,
You caused me with your plight oh so painful.

How do I hate you? Let me count the ways.
I hate your terrible smile, tongue and eyes.
Thinking of your woeful words fills my days.
My hate for you can only grow in disguise.

Now I must away with a weepy heart,
Remember my cruel words whilst we're apart.

Watching the sunrise
It's so very beautiful
Can I go to bed?

Poems are different
Like people and watches
They take different forms
From odes and to dactyls

A poem could be
A sonnet by Shakespeare
Or maybe you'd like
Funny limericks like Ed Lear

Some poems take shapes
And put them in concretes
While others write lyrics
That keep for them secrets

Many poems have structure
Like haikus and epics
Others float freely
Like elegy ekphrastics

That's it for poems
Though many are left
On this very website
Are some of them kept

Come with me into the world of elves
Where nothing is as it seems
There, forces from two worlds fight each other
And we just might get lost

And we soar from world to world
Nothing will stop us now
And we soar from world to world
Don't you want to come with me?

We will travel over the mountains on a snow white swan
And sing about what we see
Let's fight dragons and dark elves and troll
Who dwell in a far above cave

And we will soar from world to world
Now won't you just come with me?

There is only one thing that gets me out of bed
That smell of roasted dark beans
Ground up and put in a glass jar
Steaming hot water poured over them
To make the sound of angels
Then pressed down to make every single
Particle of flavour seep into the dark brown water
Pour the liquid into my favourite mug
And smile as I sip and look at the beautiful day outside

The world turned upside down
My life did as well
Everything is on hold

You don't need to believe in God
To believe in yourself