have I, have i done something wrong
is that why you grip me so strong
strangely by chance
it was simply a dance
and so we go back to the throng

there was a day when i had a cat
he was as silly as can be until he went splat
the poor old boy
he just wanted his toy
it's a shame he was such a brat.

I want to hurt myself. I want to die. I want to suffer. I hate all this pain. Mental pain is horrible. The worst of any pain. I want to disappear. I want to go to my bedroom and only leave when necessary. I want to never leave my house again. I want to take those matches and I want to set myself on fire. I want to swallow every pill I have and I want to curl up on my bed, in the dark, and cry myself to sleep. Then, I want to never wake up. I want to gouge out my eyes so I can never cry again. I want everyone to hate me, because I can't accept that they don't. I want to be a failure because that's all I deserve. I want to slice my legs up so they're symmetrical. I want people to be disgusted by my scars, by me. I just hate being in pain for so long. I am weak.

You watched the flowers die today
After the blooming buds
You then wished the pain away
All the feelings are too much

You've cried so many tears before
You've filled your house full
So you've been drowning in the rain
That came from clouds of thought

If only the moon
Could take the pain away
I could exchange it all for another way

If only I
Had the power left
I would take it from you
I would take all my pain back

So many a time
You've cried to me
And I just watched as you were eaten
You were already dead

We picked the flowers
For your grave
As you cried
I watched your rain wash them all away

If only the moon
Could take the pain away
I could exchange it all for another way

If only I
Had the power left
I would take it from you
I would take all my pain back

If you let me
I would take the pain
I would take all that was suppposed to be

If you'd stay
I'd never leave you
Whether shining eyes or pouring rain

I hang my hat after a long day at work. I'm finally home, though I'm not sure I want to be. The silence isn't too fun, but neither is the work.