I wake up and i'm a little disoriented.
It takes me a moment to realize why i feel so light inside.
I don't really need to dig you up from memory,
because I've clearly not stopped thinking about you.
I look at me in in the bathroom mirror,
and it takes me a second to recognize the person in the reflection,
The smile on my face feels foreign,like it belongs to someone else.
And i know i am right, this smile does belong to someone else,
just like how you don't really belong to me.
I know we come with an expiry date, a big conditions apply tag;
and somehow i surprise myself by pretending to be OK with it.
I surprise myself by looking forward to making more purple days with you,
when i know i should be painting shut all those windows that you've managed to pry open.
I surprise myself when i tell you that, 'i love you, oh so much!',
The words feel foreign to me, like they should be said by someone else,
and i know i'm right.
I'm stealing someone else's lines and saying them to you
yet it feels right somehow,
in a twisted,parallel universe kind of way where there is no right or wrong.
I'm walking around on this little purple cloud that you've puffed up at my feet,
and i know that lightning can strike any moment.
i surprise myself again,when i don't seem to be scared if i fall and there's no you to catch me.
And when this is finally over,
and you walk away into that sunset with who you really belong to,
i'll be left with that little box of purple days that you and i made not so long ago.
Maybe i'll let it sit in some corner of my mind...open for a while
or maybe i'll lock it up and throw away the key.
So while it lasts; i want you to know,
that you're all things purple.... to me.

I breathe in... I breathe out.
Yes, my lungs fill with air
And if I hold my breath
I suffocate.
All these - proof of me being alive.

My soul silently screams for freedom, so I tell her “GO!
Get away while you can”, and she turns;
Tip-toes out my door;
Leaves without glancing back.

Experience whispers in my ear:
“Let her go. She would never have stayed anyway”.
I reach in, grab my feelings and stuff them into an empty bag
And lock them up with my thoughts
And put them away in a dusty corner
Where I keep my smile.

I take me apart and try to fix me
But I can’t fit the pieces back together
I’m too far gone to be repaired.

Sunlight glints off the broken pieces.
They drench my room in shades of red, blue and white.
It takes my breath away
And for a brief moment there
I feel a little alive.

today i broke a bit of silence,
it fell to the ground with a bang,
shattered and fell through the tiny cracks on the wooden floor,
it got under everyone's feet and made them bleed,
it fell into their bowls of soup and made them choke,
pieces of it made tiny rainbows when the sunlight hit them,
the grit blew away with the wind and fell into people's eyes;making them go blind,
someone tried sweeping it up and throwing it away,
but the pieces were too tiny and too many,
so,today i broke a bit of silence and it didn't do much good to anyone else.