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Where did that eyelash land after I
made my wish?

Have you seen the rainbow with
colors that don't exist?
I have .....

Dreams make anything possible
Fortune is me-made
Desire can burn a
fire through a soul
smolder and smoke
inhale and choke
We learn to live
love
fall
fly
Why do we pretend that we'll
never die?
Oct 2014 · 342
A perfect circle
Indulgence


                                                    ­            freedom



                      Forever



commitment
Oct 2014 · 605
The stamina of yesterday
History repeats itself in the best
     and
worst of ways.
Déjà vu is a haunting time
     with ghosts and wonder
of the
      been there done that.
Try to make sense of it....
      Time
awkward and nonsensical
becomes yesterday before today
holding tightly to
tomorrow's promise and disappointment.
Sep 2014 · 342
Fortified
An inner strength impenetrable leaves this sole survivor
standing.
I find myself in a beautiful state of grace. Kiitos
Sep 2014 · 312
ReAlity
I am here
This is the real world
I can see truth
Even if you don't
Words and rhymes mesmerize me
But you don't fool me
Take your trash and filth
And move on

You have no home here
Time and distance collapse
and I feel
H
2
O
Swollen with your scent
Touching me with the star light
that travels the
Miles and minutes
a soft caress from the past
reminds me....
Sep 2014 · 4.1k
The exam
Seattle

I came

I saw

I conquered

Well....

Not sure about that last one

Now a game of

Wait
And
See
Aug 2014 · 580
Prepared to launch
As the known world
crumbles around me
my engines roar to life
rumbling
shooting fire.....
future tantalizes with potential
freedom
exhilarating.
Aug 2014 · 356
Contagion
I see you over there
frozen in that chair
shame oozes from your pores
and miles of open sores
slashing
and
burning
has
left
you
lonely
and
yearning
for
love
you'll
never
be
deserving
Aug 2014 · 588
Dichotomies: A series
B1

Minute

1. the sixtieth part (1/60) of an hour; sixty seconds.

2. an indefinitely short space of time:

3. an exact point in time; instant; moment
(Dictionary.com)

It feels endless
especially in waiting

Stop lights
Slow walkers
Commercials
5:00 PM
Listening for the phone to ring
Watching for him to walk through the door
over
my
threshold

Forever
Unbearable

Pregnant pauses pull me under
Aug 2014 · 392
Dichotomies: A series
B2

Minute

1. extremely small, as in size, amount, extent, or degree:

2. of minor importance; insignificant; trifling.

3. attentive to or concerned with even the smallest details.
(Dictionary.com)

If you look

too close

you may see

nothing
Aug 2014 · 376
Dichotomies: A series
A2

Retreat

a place of privacy or safety (Merriam-Webster)

Who would've imagined this old place...gutted and made to be pretty...?  That staircase wasn't there before....where the dance floor used to be. There's the stage door....still in the same place...opening right onto the busy street.   How many times was I snuck in attached to one band or another....jokingly labeled a groupie but really just passionate about being lost in the music and dancing.  The cheap beer didn't hurt.   I close my eyes and I'm transported to another time.....another place....and with my eyes closed I can sense that old warm energy licking my skin and my hair....warming my heart within the frozen casing of armor.  A moment can last forever in my vivid memory.
What a beautiful moment...took me by surprise.
Aug 2014 · 579
Dichotomies: A series
A1

Retreat

an act or process of withdrawing especially from what is difficult, dangerous, or disagreeable (Merriam-Webster)

A physical withdrawal dissatisfies you.
No one sees
     where I go
     where I am
Urges to escape the silent threats
     leaves me lonlely
     leaves you desperate
Our silence screams
Safety
Aug 2014 · 266
Memorium
I have to
     forget to remember
You

and

Remember
      to forget
the rest
Miss you forever ...happy birthday Dad
Subtitle: Actions speak louder than words*

Love     Lust     Lies

Skin
            Bone
                          Eyes

Give ­    Need     Take

Fail
              Hope
                            Fake

H­ide     Fall      Keep

Rove
             ****
                          Reap

Less     More     None

Gone
             Dead
                           Done
Jul 2014 · 717
A tedious rhetoric
His voice has that pleading
moan
As he asks
again
Are you ever coming back to me?
The subtle whining
undertone
But the irony
lies
in his query
The question he should be
posing
is to
**himself
He forgets....I never left
Jul 2014 · 2.0k
Mental masturbation
The dog chasing its tail
The cat who thinks it found a friend in the reflection in the glass
Deluded
Nothing but pity
(And maybe a little disgust)
For those who who believe they know so much
Jul 2014 · 380
5 W's
Who do you seek when your spirit is weak?

What do you do when the bluest of blue pumps throughout you?

Where do you go when darkness grabs hold and turns your heart cold?

When do you cry after the years of tears have run dry?

Why do you let your heart be ravaged and torn apart?
Jul 2014 · 363
Sweet solace of alone
Oh can't we just steal away....?
          Taste the magic for a day.....?

Displace the dread
living in my head

Just
me
myself
&
I

We'll abandon the ghost town.....
          In Nowhere I can pretend to drown.....

Not another soul
just
me
myself
&
I

here in this place
Anywhere
I can be in peace.
Jul 2014 · 520
A player at the big show
Subtitle: concert cherry popped



His eyes, full of wonder
glued to the stage
waiting for the band to assume the position
sun not yet set
the thump thump thumping
begins.
His hands raise up
he joins the crowd
still melting in to the beat
as the sun beats too.
Intermission intrigues and builds suspense
he doesn't know the process yet.
The sun slips behind the flagpole
then the jumbo-tron
racing the light show (all purples and greens).
The crowd roars to life at the first
strum and drum.
He jumps to his seat
already wearing the overpriced t-shirt he bought
lips moving, reciting the words he has
memorized from setting the CD to repeat
head bobbing
keeping a perfect beat.
When the sun finally sleeps
he gets the full effect:
light show, big drums, guitar solo, stage smoke-
No encore (musically speaking)
but a visual symphony
as the fireworks make smiley faces in the full moon sky.
Not a bad first concert experience for a 9 y/o boy (and his 7 y/o sister)....free tickets for Imagine Dragons....outside....with hip-hop band Atmosphere (hometown heroes) opening.  I couldn't take my eyes off of him despite the giant stage in front of us.
Jun 2014 · 545
rant
means

Nothing

to me
Jun 2014 · 428
Whatever gets you off
***

Whiskey
Jag
Gin
Mary Jane
Spice
Or maybe a needle makes it nice
Pictures of women
or memories of men
Meditation to a state of Zen
Books
Words
Verbal *****
A mountain
and the urge to climb it
Binging
Purging
The razor's edge
Teddy bears
Garbage
or your beloved pet
feet, hands, tongues, sweat
the TV or
internet
living vicariously through others
or stumbling solo

You decide
where you go
"You're a ***** girl"
you've gone too far
"The ***** is back"
actually, she never left
There's a few  varieties in this domain:
Some of us hang back, quiet
observing
armored
locked and loaded
ready to protect with that forcefield...
Alert
Aware
Buffering
Then there are those
malicious and spiteful
poised to pounce
and
take
take
take
Gluttonous
Perverted
Cruel
Which one are you?
I know where I stand.....proud....you know it doesn't matter
anyway  ;-)
Jun 2014 · 503
Such nonsense
Flibber flabber

          Jibber Jabber

I see the

          Flubber shudder,

Only a periphery.

          From my distance

And my perspective

           Matters of such unimportance

Sunken, rotting

          At the bottom of the sea
My armor may be a bit rusty but I've won every battle with it.  Some people, sadly, get their only pleasure from trespassing, invading and hurting others.  I will consider myself fortunate, despite my scars, that I live my life... and only mine...not as a ****** hoarding stolen moments from others.        Pax
Jun 2014 · 575
Beholder
My gaze ascends over a hue of celery
officially labeled "yellow wax pepper"
but most definitely a gentle backdrop
holding securely the reminders
of all the love the world has given me.
My toothless, cow-licked, mussed-up babes....
perfect in every way.
Across the room
a single stem stands straight and tall
deep magenta peony
plucked and giddily gifted.
A token of sweet adoration
and a gentle reminder to receive love
when it is offerred.  
Under the canopy of my white tree
the green green leaves
comfort me.
A sanctuary, my own little world
in which I can listen
for the chatter and giggles
lose myself in wonder anew
awash in a world-true.
simple pleasures :-)
It started as a tickle
an unfamilar sensation
and built
to its culmination
the explosion
at first frightening
after the initial
shock and confusion
I realized
there are no limits to my
love
with immense gratitude-XO
Jun 2014 · 263
Saw you('re)
I knew you before I ever laid eyes on you.
You were inside me since I was born.
You were in my heart since before you were born.
I remember how consumed I was wanting you
Before I received the gift of you.
Happy birthday my beautiful boy!
Jun 2014 · 346
Wrong Tree
Oh please...
I've grown so tired of
your yipping and yapping,
random running from
stump to twig
leaving a trail of **** behind you-
desperate efforts to be wanted-
to belong.
But no marking allows you to possess
what doesn't belong to you.
All that you leave behind
your legacy
are piles of steaming waste
and stains dripping down bark and leaves
and that sour stench
creating the perimeter that constructs your cage
and leaves the rest of us to walk with
grace and love
in the unsullied home of our hearts.
this one's for me
Jun 2014 · 244
find me
I'll wait....
watch for you....

But you'll have to visit
in dream

I hope to hold your hand there


I miss you
Heavy heart full and wanting
Jun 2014 · 584
Whoosh
Some people
just keep blowing hot air
like what they
think
or what they
say
matters
Pollution
Jun 2014 · 375
happy
I forgot about

the Squirrel Nut Zippers band

toes-a-tapping smile
Yes!
Jun 2014 · 758
FYI I do not take credit
"The lady doth protest too much, methinks" is a quotation from the 1602 play Hamlet by William Shakespeare. It has been used as a figure of speech, in various phrasings, to indicate that a person's overly frequent or vehement attempts to convince others of something have ironically helped to convince others that the opposite is true, by making the person look insincere and defensive.*

(So transparently self absorbed. Stay trapped in the box. I've travelled to distant planets and left the waste behind. Sometimes I feel like Charlie Brown listening to all the grown ups "wah wha whaaa....")
My beautiful daughter commented on my smile today. XO
Jun 2014 · 321
awful people
they're all over

wish I would've known

when she was on my couch
Could've saved a lot of heartache.....always assume the worst about others. You're probably right.  (Hilarious......some people are so full of themselves.   Presumptuous much? What is the old saying....? "He who doth protest...."  Feels good to smile. ).
Jun 2014 · 299
Wasted
Time
Love
Patience
Hope
Compassion
Tears
Worry
Sleep
Words
Gifts
­Truth
Pain
Effort
Knowledge
Ignorance
Faith
Belief
Things
Breath
­
*sometimes it feels as though it's all just circling the drain
Jun 2014 · 344
goin' to town
as he approaches he can't help but appreciate the view
a skyline he hasn't had the pleasure of absorbing with his eyes
for ever so long

he begins his descent throught the tangle of vines
peering past the nests of leaves and twigs
into the double moons that stare back at him

coming upon a smooth slide
he can't help but tickle as he makes his way down
resting in a hollow before his ascent resumes

now facing a climb over two gentle slopes
careful to give equal attention to both
thoroughly enjoying the bounty that fills his hands

once he reaches the crests he continues
across a plain slightly further than he had previously remembered
still scarred by the years of cultivating life

he nears the hidden chamber of home
the place he can't forget
the place he can't stop missing
he doesn't live here any more but his memories do
May 2014 · 237
Three words
May 2014 · 316
Writing in my sleep
I find myself composing while you visit me in my dreams
It's been so very long and I don't want to forget
There they are
those sparkling eyes
and
that magic mouth
In dreams you don't stay long
Fantasy and reality blend
A funeral
My grandma long dead and still a scary bad driver
You still devour me with your eyes
Even Lenny K worships me (in my dream).....
I wake up with a smile
Although you stayed only a short while
May 2014 · 252
guts
now
I
know
why
I
thought
about
you
Makes sense....empathic as I am
May 2014 · 276
Incomplete
I tried to forget

                  You

When we talk
          
         Complete

Star crossed

You .......Romeo

      To my Juliet

Can't be

Won't work

Miss you

            Empty

Without you
May 2014 · 379
....that feeds....
Always the hand
I remember
discipline
love's caress
a wave of acknowledgement

Strong
Firm
Guiding
Directing
Encouraging
Protec­ting
Possessing
Depending on the owner of the hand

The first hands
always able to envelop mine
The hands of a dad
cradling his only baby girl

Then a series of less important
man hands
never as unconditional
certainly serving a much different purpose

My own hands
miraculous in their achievements
never ceasing to surprise me
with their sensitivity

Fingers
Palms
Knuckles
Wrists
Surprisingly safe
Surprisingly ******
Think about it....
May 2014 · 214
Ugh
Ugh
So
Tired
Of
Losers
May 2014 · 176
for real
you always have

      thought only

about

       yourself
So true.....
May 2014 · 446
Hijacker
Most of us carry around the present and cumulative effects of many wounds. We've experienced uncounted broken promises, unkind words, and moments when our hopes for acceptance have been brutally crushed. Some of us have experienced more overt abuse and infidelity. How do we live with that pain? ....Other people hurt us because they are drowning and doing what it takes to fill their own emptiness.. (G. Baer, M.D.)

They are lurking everywhere
just waiting to pounce.....invade.....take
all for the sake of only
themselves.
They steal what is precious
from anyone they can
feeding hunger never sated
starving in their gluttony.  

Pay attention
                   *defective

Don't let them in
                   invasive
Protect yourself
                   vindictive
From their sin
                   *destructive
No hope for the eternally selfish, damaged, and broken....so sad
May 2014 · 322
Sweet Iza
We were a lot alike
     You and I
You looked so tough
     on the outside
But we always knew
     your bark was just your voice
There was no bite
     Only love and unconditional adoration
Big brown eyes gazed at me
     bathing me with love
Always understanding and warm
     We were each others' shelter through the storms.
Goodbye my sweet friend, companion, nanny, and pseudo-baby. I will miss you.
May 2014 · 308
Such wisdom, Mr. Cash
She used to love me with a love that wouldn't die
Looking at her now I can't believe I said good-bye
It would only take a minute to turn back the clock
She used to love me a lot

I remember how good it was back then
And I said it's not to late to start again
We could spend a night together
Take up where we left off
She used to love me a lot

Then I panicked as she turned to walk away
As she went out the door I heard her say
Yes I'm in need of something
But it's something you ain't got
But I used to love you a lot*

highlight of my day

take a listen
May 2014 · 442
Corpse
Marry*
rests in repose
The crowd of bystanders  
not  yet aware of her departure
They can't see the daggers
driven in still
Denial hangs thick in the air
choking and suffocating
Some of us stay shrouded
Our period of mourning intermittently
punctuated  
with the sting of
Sharp
Hot
Tears
Then divine numbness as we slip
into the coma of the day
May 2014 · 323
Dirty little secret
Eyes reflect with ashen glow
all the things you don't want to know
Truth will set you free they say
sometimes I seek ignorance,
bliss just one more day
I can march across mountains
my burdens bare for all to know
I'll never be
locked down
sheltered
hidden
veiled
I can ring my bells of truth
echoing through the town
I'll never be
silenced
gagged
muted
bound
I am precise
unadulterated
transparent
real and true
forever laid bare
authenticity shines through
*I will never be someone's shame
Apr 2014 · 294
36 years true
Dearest
Real-est
Truest
The ones who mean the most
Missing a few
And my heart breaks for that
But love the ones who
Love me back
Perfect birthday gift!  Thanks ladies !!  Made all the monsters go away for a little while.
Subtitle: Unexpected visitors

Entanglement states that two particles that have become linked in a special way can be separated to any distance-even opposite ends of the universe-and a change in one particle will be immediately reflected in the other. (M. Ireland)

Seems when my lids are shut tight
that's when my mind's eye cracks open
Clarity within the fog.....
I see a sweet little cottage
     cozy and quaint
just like a stage set for
secrets.
My approach reveals an open door
     open mind
          open heart.
There's snow blanketing the ground....
at least one representation of the
real world.
I step through the door to find
a most unexpected surprise.....
     the butterflies in my stomach emerge from dormancy
     our lips electrified
     magnetic.
This time we both try to fight it
Try* being the key word.
Off stage
     off set
           off site
I know another really important person is there.
I want to see him more
but I can't pull myself away.
He is a memory.
He has yet to visit.
He makes me feel safe
but the butterflies go back to sleep when I step away from
you.
Possibility of anything inherent in dreams......
When the phone rings
                and when it doesn't.
Parking lot drive-by's
                bars...hotels....gas stations....public parks.....
Lost library books
                and lost teeth.
Going to the grocery store or
               running out of Nutella......
A funeral
               and a birthday party.
Broken dishes
               and  a steady diet of broken promises.
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