When I was little all I wanted to do was fly
Like angels in the bible
Or like Peter Pan
With a little bit of faith, trust
And lots of pixie dust

When I was a bit older
I dreamed of being like a bird
While looking out of the classroom window
Not wanting to return home
I could spread my wings and protect myself
And fly
Just fly

One day I tried to fly
When I launched myself off my balcony
But gravity pulled me down and red liquid blossomed from my knee
While tears stained my cheeks
"What were you doing?" My mom yelled
I hiccuped through my crying
"I just wanted to fly."

I am standing on the edge
150 feet up in the air
I try not to think of it as falling
I imagine myself finally flying
And feeling the wind rush across my face and leave me flushed
I spread my arms and imagine wings
And let go
All to fly

Where I see hip-bones and ribs, you see my
fragile heart calling for you. I see three numbers
on the scale- 1, 2 and 6. You see the graceful body of
a free spirit that only you can bring back to earth.
You see unused spoons and forks and unopened
packages of macaroni and cheese, but I only see my
reflection in the silverware and how much thinner my
face is since seeing a 4 on the scale this morning.
I see dark circles under my eyes, nothing that
can't be fixed, but you see a girl waking up
at 3 in the morning and wanting nothing
more than to have you in bed with her.

You picked the wrong girl, babe. You're so right for me
but I want more than you can give
but who knows? Maybe you can give me
everything I need and more.
You promised to love me forever and someday
we'll run away together. We'll get on a bus or a train
with a little money and each other. You'll be wearing
jeans because I love the way they look on you
and I'll be wearing jeans because they're baggy
and you can't see how thin I've gotten.

I see us on our own, a little apartment just for us.
A sanctuary. Where we can run away from it all and
we won't buy a scale because
I won't care anymore. I'll look into your eyes
and finally see myself as you see me.
Because where I see a girl that needs to be saved you see a girl who could be strong enough to save herself