Twenty-three years now and the same sun rises
along the rim of a big blue sky with layered clouds.
A myriad of kaleidoscopic colors leaks through
surrounding me with nostalgic warmth.
Remembering everything that brought me here.

That sticky, unbearable Texas heat
whirling in the wind of a summer afternoon.
Sleeveless dress, sunburnt skin, watermelon smile.
Five years of beauty growing into a thin young girl
who wanted to learn about everything,
Shifting into the youth of an actress in an over-the-top
melodramatic performance at a local theatre.
Selling art and collecting coins to travel
across our globe, and then,
my first plane ticket to Vietnam.

Nineteen came dressed in bittersweet wanderlust.
Packed my bags and drove my car to Portland, Oregon.
Four cameras, disheveled notebooks, ink-stained hands.
Those tall forest trees of enchantment,
a photographer's dream.
Traveling down the west coast to desert lands:
Seattle, San Francisco, Santa Fe.

Somewhere in there I ended up sleeping beneath the stars
with a belly full of wine in Alaska.
The summer solstice singing me a song while tears brim up my eyes
because the world has never looked more lovely.
Aurora borealis shimmering her lights above
a reflecting ocean of pastel
Reds and golds, blues and pinks.

A lucky lady who has touched corners
of love and sadness and wonder.
Burned imprints of goodbyes
in the crevices of my mind, but this is who I am.
Living and breathing in this extravagance.

Zipper your arms around me,
and meld into my eyes.
Button your lips to mine,
and let me breathe in that autumn air
while I'm wrapped in you.

Slip your hands down my waist
while I crack a weathered smile.
Stitching your fingers through mine.
Let me know that all of this coldness that we've felt
is merely from the seasons.

Pressing your forehead to mine,
leaving everything the Summer held behind.
We're just two people,
crunching fallen leaves with our feet,
which echo the sounds of what we're
trying so hard to avoid.

If I'd known
you'd never
come back
I'd have stopped
for, like, four seconds
to memorize the freckles
on your arms.
I'd have taken time
to brand your laugh
into my eardrums
and imprint your arms
around my waist.
I wish I'd had more of a chance
to steal all your pieces,
but three days
equals practically no days
and you were gone.

So it went
like this -
she said,
"My therapist
thinks we
should break up."
and I replied,
"Yeah,
my psychiatrist
says that we
should break up, too."
so soon after,
we broke up.
It was like
Woody Allen
and Diane Keaton.
I didn't know
that such comedies
could actually
be real.
The way
that it appears
in my memory
is something
that isn't exactly real.
That's life!
(I think...).

What's the point?
Enjoy the ride?
Smoke a joint.
Now go and hide

Wait it out
You're just paranoid
Let out a shout
Just to fill the void

Feelings of emptiness
It's all in your head?
Inhumane levels of stress
Just go to bed

Nighttime rolls swiftly back again like an old familiar sin haunting the days end
Motivation creeps in, empty shoes ask where ya been to my bare footed skin
Worn down socks lay on the floor halfway out the door as if they couldn't take anymore
Life"s a bore if you know what"s in store, but if no one"s keeping score, then what"s it all for?

No matter how many times I made her ecstatically moan
No matter how many shots I made while in the zone
No matter how many things I"ve learned then shown
Just please always let the battle be forever known
That in the end we will all transcend again...alone

I have been sailing
through the somewhat dangerous
sea of life,
seeking the new world
where there
is peace, love, happiness, wisdom, and compassion.
I sought it inside
the mind and body.
So, I found crazy mantras
and incomprehensible chants
and ways to sit
that once broke my ankle,
and a practice
of quieting the mind
that nearly killed me.
So this morning,
on Christopher Columbus Day,
I found
the true mantra
for me
and the true chant
for me,
the true words
which will bring
love, peace, happiness, wisdom and compassion,
and they are
love, peace, happiness, wisdom and compassion.
So now
I have found
my new world.
Happy Christopher Everson Day!

In the costume drama of the universe,
there are no roles we haven't donned,
we ruled the seas, land and skies,
in an oblivious flow beyond eons.

A million years ago, one morning,
I stood here, a Neanderthal, naked
facing an ebullient sea, ecstatic,
in the frenzy of creation.

On a tree branch you sat, near
a bird with colorful plumes,
that sang for my heart to rejoice,
the tune had something ethereal
that transformed me to a handsome pagan, so sudden,
tears streaming down my cheeks, words eluding, I promised
to pay you later, for that invaluable gift, magical
you waved your wings and said, "See you later"

Today,
you flashed your smile, and I remembered
the song, that transformed me to a man
on my winding road to evolution.
Now, you sit looking at my eyes, oblivious of our past
an alluring lass, a bird from paradise,
touching my heart yet again.

You said, "As I saw you in the crowd,
some thoughts, mysterious rushed in
as if I know you, some time, perhaps a life before?
*"The truth is " I murmured in  to your ears-
"One million years, aren't that far"
you might not understand, but your heart did answer
those eyes unfailingly told me at once.