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I could have loved you forever.
I found this scribbled on the notepad I keep on my nightstand, I must have written it when I woke up in the middle of the night.
 Sep 2013 Alexis Martin
Robin
You are lucky
to not be in love,
it hurts to badly.
but is it all worth
an empty heart?
I miss your familiarity
with my silence
your understanding
of my laughter
and your simple way
of letting me know
that I was not alone
I think I'm addicted
To this sad song
Because it reminds me of you
You're the touch of happiness
Surrounded by the sadness
Of knowing you'll never care about me

You're the melody
Everyone loves
I'm a lone note
No one would know was gone
You're loved
I'm not
So let the sad song play on
 Sep 2013 Alexis Martin
Robin
Have you ever fallen in love for an instant?
For just a moment,
all you want is that person.
For an instant,
everything is frozen.
Then all in the same moment
it all changes back
and life hits you hard
and that person never crosses your mind again
but in the back of your mind
you will always remember that love you had
just for that short second.
 Sep 2013 Alexis Martin
Robin
If I loved you. You know what would happen
life would be different.
we could have read poetry and only cared about what we wrote
Talked about our friends behind their backs
not keep our words
and pretend to not know what is right
avoided helping a homeless man eat
and speed in school zones
the world would have been better if we were together
we could have been better than other couples
and flaunted our love in front of all the lonely souls
did drugs together
became to attached to our things
maybe even start a family
and raise those children on our beliefs and nothing less
to have an open mind, yet condem the poor and weak
those children would grow up hating us and we will love it
One will actually do something with her life
and the other will die trying
to get away from this life we have come to love
and we will grow old
with our money
and big house to ourselves
we could have been corrupt in our actions and thoughts
but we could have been in love and that is all that matters.
Not our friends
our families
our children
anything,
except our money and our beliefs.
and that would be our lives together
and oh, what a life it would be.
The life of a courpt american love story
the story we all follow
with or without permission
slowly we lean
until we die.
I wonder who
You assume
These words are really for

(If you think you are
'You'
You probably are)
All I can say is
I guess I'm pretty happy
you asked me that, too.
the first time you saw me and I saw you
I was crying in the drivers seat of my car.
I mean really sobbing.
a ****** song was blasting on the radio,
probably so loud you could hear it
through the walls of my car.
at that point I had nothing to lose
and so I didn't even turn it down.
I didn't try and wipe the tears away,
because the look on your face didn't make me feel bad and I think that's some sort of gift you have.
you were looking right through my windshield
and you knew I was watching you, too.

I need you to know:
I wish that wasn't your first impression of me
because I'm not always like that.
but I cry an awful lot
and I'm usually embarrassed by that.
so, I guess, in a way, I'm glad you got to see me sad
because it wasn't fake.
I just wish I knew what you thought.
maybe someday I will.
loneliness
is when you have watched your favorite show
so many times
that you, as well as your family,
know the complicated theme song
and everybody sings along every night
as you sit down for dinner in front of the TV
and then you watch it at midnight
when no one's awake
and you let it play without singing

love
is eavesdropping on a sister and brother
walking behind you,
the sister as high as a kite
and the younger brother wearing a leather jacket
as he holds her hand to lead her through a forest,
and you realize they love each other
more deeply than you could ever understand
and they always have
and always will

happiness
is
healthy babies being born,
healthy soldiers coming home

sadness*
is
a newlywed
dying
on her honeymoon
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