Look at you;
So flawless,
So beautiful in and out.
You feel lost because you lost the boy you love.
But you craved freedom more than anyone in the world.
You love but you cannot hold on.
It has to do with the fear you have of losing your life soon.
But you need to know that a beautiful soul like you deserves happiness and people who appreciate the naked soul.
Because its nothing about ******* yourself and giving them a bitter taste of the loneliness you experience when you aren't with him.
You need to believe that you're worth the love he is giving you, because that cage he put around you, is a loving protective shield, keeping you away from poisoning all the other boys.
Your addictive poison. He gets high on your poison, craves it, loves it even though it might end up killing him on the inside.
Darling, you're all of our poison.

I've never felt so genuinely sad
It's almost beautiful

"You have that medicine I need.
Shoot it up, straight through the heart please."

He flashed his million dollar smile, and took my soul away with ease
Licking the surface of my cold skin, as it trembled with deficiency

He left a trail of love bruises down my neck and chest
"Please don't hurt me," I dared to suggest

His bruises were his way of saying "Mine."
I closed my wet eyes, and counted slowly to nine

He never understood me after all
All I wanted was to be wanted
Not by him, but by them all

Ever caught yourself halfway falling for someone?
It feels like you've just been pricked by the most beautiful rose, the beauty of it puts you in awe, but the blood frightens you. You smile but all you can think of is how the person before them made you smile like that. You wish you could just hold them, feel their presence around you but you want to stay safe and alone. They're your idea of a perfect escape from reality and everything painful because everything real that you've experienced has left you broken and in the dirt. Despite everything, you're still sitting there looking at the beautiful rose, you remove everything painful about it and sit there with pure beauty and perfection because this rose is exactly what you are when you're with this person. You two, are this combined, pure, beauty.

Sitting in the pouring rain, smoking my last cigarette
Holding back tears that seem to be suffocating me

I am my worst nightmare

If we existed in different dimensions
I would be the one that failed to be anything extraordinary

I would be the one that cared too much, and trusted too easily
The one who swore she wouldn't become this way
The one who let herself go, and winced at the pain of the world crashing on top of her

I could have been so much more

Maybe this dimension is too much for me
Perhaps I would be better off not being here at all

The bullet flew so quickly from the pistol it felt like the blood in my veins stopped for a moment
As if quantum physics were just a mere myth
Of random laws and physicists
Each individual cell and atom in my body stopped and rushed to abyss

Thump, thump.

As the bullet reached the end of your skull, I swore I died instead of you
But instead of dying and leaving the realm of the living I enter bliss and happiness

Flowers scattered over bright green grass for miles,
Soft and whispering wind rushed past my freckled skin
The trees swayed with the wind
It brought an epitome of perfection, only your carcass brought death and decay

Snapping back to reality, your eyes rolled back, and your jaw opened wide
I wanted to tear it open, to give you a somewhat permanent evil smile
Your body hit the ground so hard, the sound vibrated across my body, giving my heart the ability to beat normally again
You looked so peaceful for a mere moment
I swore I could have kissed you even though I despise your very being

Your skin quickly went colorless, and you laid there so still
I burst into panicked laughter, and covered my filthy mouth
It was definitely rude to laugh at someone's death

My stomach growls, and my hands shake with satisfaction
I've finally done it. I killed my insecurities

After a short moment of freedom and what seemed to be like genuine tears of joy...
Your eyes roll back to normal, and they focus me closely
Rising from the ground, you flick your hair back as if the wind blew it out of place
You fix your shirt, as if the blood stains weren't there

"It's so silly to think you could get rid of me so easily," you say.

I'm never going to feel alive ever again