I will never under estimate the beauty of a woman, I hardly have the strength to tell these ******* no. I'm blinded by perfection.............#superhomo

In the begining I was blind
But now I see too clearly
The nonsense is over
And now I am growing
Fairwell to what was
Hello to fresh start
I'm building myself up
And letting the old fall apart
I quite frankly could care less
Of what they have got to say now
Because now I'm getting mines
And jealousy can ****
Not me but you
So step it up ladies and you'll be fresh too

I've seen you quite a few times
Reacurring visits you made to me
In my dreams
You are of dark complexton
And ***** hair
Your a wide smile
That keeps me loaded
Your body
An amazing piece of architecture
Though your beauty soars beyond its means
You denie any truth of this
Your continuous laughter
Keeps my heart light
You speak of love
Of ***
You speak of my beauty
Though I disagree
We play like children
Not quite as inocent as it all has seemed
You have ran back and forth through all of my dreams
Up and down my blood you have streamed
I have fallen in love with a figment of imagination
Though real in my heart
I cry at the recognition
You are not physical
I cannot hold you in my hands
Caress your face with my fingertips
You cannot press your lips against mine
cannot let our hands intertwine
You share your thoughts with me
And I share mine
I see you night and day
While i'm in bed
Or in my head
I hope too see you
One day in the flesh
So we can color the pavement with gold
And count the stars
Untill we get to old
Now your a just a fantasy
Eating at my reality
Confusing me with what is and what is not real

For those who have left us
Those who couldn't handle the pain
Too the people who kept pushing
Ended they're lives
Too the ones who comtributed to the hate
Made it harder to go on
*******
I travel to the moment they tie the noose
I take them by the heart
I see all their hurt
I cry, I wish I could have stopped them
If only I could have made a change
Some way
Maybe they'd still be breathing
Maybe they would be making changes now
If only the rope wasn't strong enough
Surely they never thought they would do it
Never thought that what was going through their mind was this seriousness
This agony
I feel for the mourners the people who loved
I am a mourner of faceless broken hearts
I want to help
Want to help these kids
Taking their lives
Please let me help you
Please, don't break my heart
I feel that if they leave
What am I to do
**** myself too?
I will not let them
******* my mind
Though quite weak already
I will make a change
This cannot happen anymore
I won't let it.

Is it weird
That you see my hair and think of the sun?
My smile is of fake compliments given by everyone
My kindness bares unconditionally
Though I am misunderstood
Please love me
Though I don't love myself
Teach me
Though I'm to stubborn to learn
Too naive to understand
I want to
No one will let me
Not a soul wants to clean this up
Put together whats been broken for years
I'm sorry i'm not what you expected
I wish I was

Sorry
I don't see it
Don't see the beauty
Don't see the happiness
I'm sick
I am disgusted
I am nothing
Nothing but a gray cloud in the sky
Not even caring to take a second glance
Not worth it
Not enough
You laugh because I am a joke
You cry because you feel bad
I laugh because I can't cry.....
I smile because I can't frown......
Your words mean nothing
Though sweet as can be
The more you say them
The more I am confused with "ME"
I think I was put here to entertain
But if that was true I would have been blessed with talent.
I try and take away whats their
But it always creeps its way back
Makes me nervous
Lets me know
That i'll never be good enough
Never be okay
Always insane
But i'm fine