I've probably already told myself a hundred times,
But it's not easy having a stubborn mind
I'm becoming numb every single time
Why do I always feel empty inside

My life's not great, but it's not the worst
And yet I still feel that somehow,Maybe I'm cursed
Or maybe i'm just overreacting about the problems I have
I hate that I feel like I'm fighting this battle alone,

Maybe it's not the amount of problems at hand
But the lack of support I currently have
Maybe I'm just a weak building that's not sturdy enough,
To carry the pain and misery I'm feeling right now

All I know is i'm a bit tired of everything and everyone around me
All I know is that the feeling I have right now, its not happy,
I would change my life if I would be given another
Or if I could restart my life again, I'd end it earlier

I can't really call this a poem in the sense,
It's something more akin to a expression of what I feel,
It's the regret I have of doing nothing,
And it's crazy I know, that nothing is making me feel this way

"They met by chance and knew it was fate,
But even they had no idea that it was a little to late,
Their love was a flower starting to blossom,
But it was already destined to fall at the bottom

For he was in a battle she didn't know,
He was swimming against the direction in which the river flows,
He is a clock that runs all day without stopping
She is one of the cogs that keeps him running

But as irony has it,this clock is running out of time
Even though all of its components and gears were fine,
He was already struggling for sometime,
It's sad that this clock is in a race against time

And now the love that was just beginning,
Took a sudden turn,...it started dying;
He was lying about his pain,She was trying to stay sane,
They were both suffering because of God's little game,

And now that the dusk has settled,and everything was clear,
He only felt sadness,even though the end is near;
Tick...Tock, as the clock stops working,
Tick...Tock, She drops on her knees...crying,

Finally the boy is not in pain,he is at peace;
But the girl was broken trying to to fill in the missing piece;
And like the boy did before ,she also cried in pain,
With a heartbreaking reason that is oddly the same,

They couldn't be with each other, this was the truth,
Their love was never gonna bear fruit;
So she says a final goodbye to the boy in the suit,
And their love that was a flower with a poisoned root"

As she enters the room with a grin on her face
I just stare and wonder what she’s smiling about
Am I in love? Well I hope that’s not the case
But the smile I have causes me to doubt

She brightens up everything around her
How she can do this everyday is simply amazing
Or I can just be a biased writer
Because as I’m writing I feel my heart racing

I’ll try my best to write what I actually think
Eventually I’m going to be enveloped by a sea of emotions where I’ll sink
So I will try my best to not get carried away
I’ll try my best to use this words to say what I can’t say

I wish I could compare her to a flower
But that comparison isn’t really the best suited for her
A flower maybe beautiful, but a flower is something that eventually withers
She isn’t just looks, she’s far more than that, she’s funny, smart, she’s better

Then I thought about comparing her to the sun might be right
Because she has that smile that just so bright
But staring at her doesn’t cause me any harm
It doesn’t feel like scorching heat, it feels more like calming warm



Realizing the reason I can’t compare her to anything is because she’s simply unique
A girl so special in ways I cannot count, my interest was piqued
A girl that can face tons of hardships but still remains strong under the pressure
She is someone that can smile in front of the storm, it’s simply her nature

Someone that can make me question my sanity
Someone that can do nothing and still make me happy
And maybe I am crazy because I feel like her smile can make me melt
Or it’s just from the feeling of going through the rollercoaster of emotions I’ve felt

Wishing I can finally recover from this before I become truly mad
Hoping I can bury this feelings six feet under this land
And I know it is cowardly move for me to run away
But being your friend is honestly more important is all I can say

And to be clear, I am not In love with you or anything
You are just someone I constantly think of and that inspire me to write something
And I wouldn’t risk losing a friend because of something trivial
I can never risk losing you by confessing I like you… even if it is just a little

"As I climb above this high building,
It was as if I had the feeling I was flying
That was how my feelings grew bigger,
It suddenly spread like wildfire,

But now I was too high on the edge,
Even a single wrong step, and I might fall from this ledge
Realizing this feelings developed incredibly fast,
Jet like emotions, I would suddenly crash

So before I fall down this deep abyss,
I'll to my best to put a stop to this
I won't go down this building,
But I also won't be trying

I'll just do my best not to further fall,
I'll do keep my balance, I'll give it my all,
And I would just stay in the buildings edge if I can,
So I won't become the falling man"

It was probably that smile that caught me,
And your bubbly personality,
It was just the perfect mixture,
And that’s why I fell, I’m sure,

But you weren’t someone that moves gracefully,
Everyone actually considers you downright clumsy,
Reaching class late, still having a smile on your face,
Just entering and any existing shame, I see no trace

I could write something that overpraises you,
Like comparing you to the radiant Sun and how I think it’s true,
Or a flower in some garden, where you shine the brightest,
Very cringey stuff are what I often write, cheesy at best,

Excuse me for being the creepy type of man,
You probably won’t like this, since poems and other stuff you’re not much of a fan,
Often making this poems for you is hard, although I like It,
Understand I’m trying to remove how I feel, but constantly failing to do it,

And even when I fail, know I’m trying my best to,
Not fall completely and irrationally fall for you,
Despite that sudden burst of happiness being the reason I feel the way I do,
Somehow I will try slowly becoming distant from you

Okay, finally going back to what I was saying,
Recently though I was just trying to figure out something,
Reasons to why you really look bright through my eye,
Yet I still can’t think of proper answer no matter how hard I try,

To be completely true it’s just how you are overall,
Honestly I think everything about you is what made me fall,
And now I think I’m at the height of what I’m feeling,
Now I’m probably close to its ceiling,

Keeping up with the status quo is the only thing I can do,
You probably will become a distant memory after college is through,
Or someone I can still casually see every once in a blue moon,
Unless I do something about how I feel, I think I should say goodbye soon,

Getting to know someone lie you who can face life with a smile so bright,
Oh how great it is that you can still shine in life’s uphill fight,
Over that smile though is still someone that feels depression,
Despite how bright you smile, I think you still feel this crippling sensation,

Because everyone of us is victim to failure’s hold,
Yet I still believe despite the ton of pressure you experience you wouldn’t fold,
Even if the wind feels a little colder, and you feel breathing the air is becoming harder,
I know you won’t suffocate under the stress, you’ll probably even become better,

This poem is getting a bit long so I’ll wrap this up quick,
I have no idea if you have some kind of trick,
That you can just glow like the way you do,
Again it’s cheesy but I wholeheartedly believe it is true,




You may not feel even the slightest of how I feel for you,
And you probably be even annoyed about the things I do,
But for you to change is something I do not wish,
The imperfect you is the prefect you as crazy as the sound of it is,