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Our fixation with hand held machines
And replacing meals with soybeans
A spectator to arguments over vaccines
We're all underemployed and "getting-by" by other means
Living vicariously through our broken screens
Lobotomized and abused; nearly at-risk teens
Utterly lost in so many depression memes
Farmed and sent out from the Phillipines
Too desensitized to hear our own internal screams
January 2nd 2020
the roses are dead
the violets are too
if you want to join them
i'll come with you
February 12 2019

fifty-nine

Just kidding*fingers crossed*
Why is suicide so ****?
Every body is fighting a battle you know nothing about,
So be kind
Always
I’m not a hero in any sense of the word
I’m not a brave heart, not a tough guy
I question so much in this head of mine
I question but get no answers most of the time
In my mind goldfish swim round senselessly
I am forgetting all the things I said
I read but I am not well read
My head keeps spinning relentlessly
Is this uncommon, can I be mad
Is this the norm, it makes me  sad
To think of the cruelty that we face
The money, all the wars and hate
I want to be a hero,  save the world
I want to be an angel, but I am just a girl
Making her way every  day
In an agony of indecision, a catalogue of division
So I’m not a hero in any sense at all
But if you are a hero, a brave heart
Please save the world, answer the call
To love me is to accept sleepless nights; to accept immortality; to accept that you love what you cannot mend. In other words (which are not my own):

“I do not know what makes a writer, but it probably isn’t happiness.”
No sir, no not me
Come no closer, can’t you see?
I’m freezing as the springtime frost
So won’t you let me be?
Wind tossed as the blossom
Bleeding from the tree
I am but a child; I’m lost
I am wild, not dutiful
Scarred inside; not beautiful
My demon lover  left me
Underneath the cherry tree
No sir, no not me

No sir, no not me
Come no closer, can’t you see?
I am not a fresh faced maid
No sir, we can’t be
Plucking cherries in the glade
Walking in the evening shade
I’m buried in the foetid earth
Awaiting spring, denied rebirth
In the soft sun, in the rain
I shall never rise again
No-one can ever set me free
No sir, no not me
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