Alone, cold, and mislead
is what it feels like to be unwanted.

After a while the feelings are accepted,well actually any feeling.

Maybe this was planned maybe if I keep going I will see a light.

Through this darkness I will come.
Feelings of acceptance creep in, slowly, but they still come.

Laughter seems so far away, like it is foreign where I am.

Where is that I ask? Why does it even matter because I know what darkness feels like.

I know what being unwanted feels like.

Because no one can help me now. Now that I know what it feels like and what it means.

Now I know what it means to be

                                              Darkly Unwanted.

Friends are like
Moonlight
Showing you and guiding you
Down your path
And protecting you
From what's to come

friends are like

pebbles on a beach
sometimes the plain ones
are worth the most
but i've never been good
at the picking up the pebbles part
i worry i read into
i over compensate
i try to be chill
but i just act manic
because acting like
yourself
when you look in the mirror is hard enough, but with
real
live
actual people?
writing is easier
but my friends
the pebbles I've managed to keep in my pocket
are the smoothest
shiniest
flawed
exceptional
pebbles on the whole beach
and I've lost a few
picked up ones that weren't good
to me
as i was their pebble
but my friends are
the rocks
that keep me weighted
in the real world

Seductive and deadly

Harsh and loving.

now most guys are really harsh and you would never think they are capable of love, but they are.
For example my Boyfriend he's a very protective and touchy type.
Now most people would be like Get of me your to clingy
But think about it for a second....Wouldn't it be nice to say that for once it's your man being the one to show you the affection first?

You call me a stubborn child like it's a bad thing
But have you ever asked yourself where I got it from?
I probably got it from you
You're ******* stubborn too

I met a guy by the riverside and I was in Denile
He made me laugh he even kept my smile
He made my heart thump when he touched me twice
He stole my love when he read me his favorite book
He stole my heart when he made his first real poem deticated to me, and he confessed all his feelings
Our souls slowly became attached to each other as we got to know each other
And I realized,
His soft gentleness is slowly conquering my insides
By turning my ******* into marshmellos and daisies
I'm not even sure if I agreed to this
If I even wanted this
It's confusing to know what I want, I want him, and I don't feel the same with him
He changed me
Forever he
No, forever we
Are bound together in time

As you left me standing in the cold,
I started thinking about memories old.
They... Once made of gold
Now hold...
No value in my heart.
You have taken my heart apart.

I am but left...
To scramble for scattered remnants.
A vessel bereft,
Of its erstwhile tenants...

On my knees...
Picking up pieces with sombre gait.
Mind only sees...
An fallen dance with the ghosts of late.

As I begin with a clean slate,
I can't imagine so much hate.
For someone who I loved...
I try and push your memory away
But in the effort I sway.
It is too much to bear...
I'd give anything to hear...
Another I love you,
From you.
What happened when we were together
Our bond...
Was supposed to last forever,
But now it's just an echo of memories fond.

These young initial steps that I take...
Will eventually hasten in pace.
Leaving behind the scars that ache,
And embrace the new breeze that cradles my face.


Vardaan Nayar
**ryn