Detached like, Burning nights.
no lights, without hope.
missing scope, not alike.
Separate Dreams, Laughing peers.
dry tears, exposed lies.
useless tries, my extremes.
Apart now, Nothing here.
all fear, Brighter times.
hidden crimes, I allow

I’m drunk and emotional, what about you?
I just can’t stop, how do you?
The point is beautiful, why are you?
Through all my stuff, there stands you.
My light that holds, the one that knows me.
I only wish you were true.

Can’t crack a smile, when I’m still in denial
This pain I feel, it’s only real
When I hold a knife, and think of my life
But that’s some lie, so I can sit and cry.

Can’t think straight, when I’m still late
I’m just mad at me, it’s driving my insanity
Why am I like this, my life is pure bliss
That’s my dream, teared at it’s ream

Can’t sleep at night, when I can’t see right
Just face it you lost kid, stop tightening the lid
See the fault with diplomacy is
The more you lie about happiness,
The worse it gets, that’s just your sloppiness.

You’re not alone, you just don’t feel at home
Where you sleep, and where you weep
They aren’t the same, you can’t place blame
This is your problem.
So I must take it alone then.

I pulled down the lights,
Lifted off the posters.
Removed my name from my home.
No more, are warm nights,
Or alcohol stained coasters.
I sit by the door, alone.

I stand above on this cliff,
Before me, a legion of colour.
As they march continuously, endlessly.

I demand them to stop, to become stiff,
Their colours, to fade in my land of grey.
For I can’t rest till they’re all grey.

My cries fall on Death’s ears.
Their power impossible to the light.
And the colours continue forward.

Your hate is strong,
Lie littered little girl.
With you, turns good wrong,
I grow stronger alone.

You are kind without reason,
Picture perfect person.
With you, is like a spring season.
I slowly worsen.

I got nothing. All I have is:
I scream into the void, wanting answers.
But I hear, not what I want, Darkness dances

I want the sun to set,
The end of the day, the cold grip met.
Not for the moonlight,
But the sun heat, I’m too weak.
I want the warmth, of a cold night.

Dear Mr. Whoever read this,
I just wanna say, I’m feeling lost and scared.
Because I’m at a challenge and I can’t miss,
And it’s hard for me, because she cared.
But you know, I feel like I can’t go on,
It’s not her, but what’s knocking upstairs
I love her, but it’s hard cuz I feel like a thorn,
**** it. I don’t even know if she cares.
All I feel is blank, constantly drained
But I know that she sees me strong
And I can’t fail her, but it’s always just rained
And the ground is slippy, Aren’t I wrong
She just sees me strangely
And she loves that I’m here
But I’m sure she would rearrange me
And not blink If I disappear.

I’m sorry, I know
you deserve, a better friend.
But as the day, always end
and time waits, never.
There was, not a whether,
But a when, I would fail you.

With the sun radiating down upon us,
And the waves of learning penetrating our ears,
The teacher asked the knowledge defiant,
a simple question.

And with the quarks on their face
and with the oxygen  in their lungs
and with the water on their  tongues
and with the neurones in their brain.
They turn up blank.

A small chuckle enters this closed system,
The omniscient teacher had triumphed,
And his students sat in a void,
With one hand elevated, with more energy,

The teacher turns back
and with the plan in his mind
and the idea in his plan
and the thought in his idea
and the emotion behind his thought

A large grin appearing in the room
The student had displaced the power
He pushed the teacher into a precipitate slump
And responded to the impossible question.

What was the answer?
What was the work behind it?
How did they come to that?
We will never know,  

Physics is pretty boring

i hate how easy it is,
to turn around and go.
it gives me grief,
just to know,
that all I need,
is some rope,
to abandon hope,
and the setting sun won’t rise anymore

I walk into my room
Head down, feeling lost
I can’t explain it,
I’m alone in a crowd

I look at the mirror
Eyes lock, searching deep
I can’t explain it,
I find nothing there

I look at my glass
Head up, wobbling arms
I can’t explain it,
I’m lost to the colours

I cry into my pillow
Eyes closed, screaming silent
I can’t explain it,
It’s my last friend

I look at my wrist
Thoughts racing,heart pacing
It’s all bare
But today is not the day.

I can’t explain it.

This is forced, my notes- Blank.
My plans- Numb. I drive my Will.
It weeps words, the pen I shank.
The ink I spill,
A heightened thrill.

How do I apologise to you?
What should, could I do.
When did you last shed a tear?
Darling, honey, sweet dear
Do not pout,
The sun is setting if you look out.

In a Life of free will,
I chose to give myself away.
Not for wealth or influence, but
to learn everything I can,
Of you.

Concrete hallways guide forever,
Doors to doors, empty rooms.
The quiet hum of ventilation,
The silent loss of consciousness.
Fear what’s behind, don’t look!
Forget the breathing, on your back.
That wasn’t a touch, you can’t feel.

My thoughts of you, they torment me.
It’s true.
I dance with their lies, wither in ignorance.
Happiness cries.
This pain I do, I won’t stop,
Not for you.

I am fine, what does that mean?
Do you think twice about me?
Does your heart flutter to my voice?
Do you get lost in my eyes?
Does your mind trip at my sight?
Do you question what I say?
Do my actions scare you?
No?
That’s what I’m fine means.

Order had returned, the bright tyranny faded
into dark freedom, the day had ended.
No more shall the heat force sweat,
Nor shall the light demand blindness.
The cool breeze whispered pleasantries,
Welcome back my love, I hope all is well.
For my hollow arms grew cold without you,
And my holy wails grew emptier, no more
no longer. We are united again, in darkness.

The days grew long,
I wish I had the truth
Instead of going along
And  buying all of your lies

The nights grew short,
I wish I had my friends
Instead of choosing you
And leaving un-cut ends

My eyes grew dry,
I wish I had someone else
Instead I followed you
And closed my door to others

The cuts grew deep,
I wish I could stop
Instead this my only path
And I will walk it alone.

I stand triumphant, my words
echo here across the world of ours.
The woes that once plagued me, all
fall into towers of salt and sand.
A voice beckons to me, birds
come here across to see the truth.
One once great empire of words, fall
Into the ruins of what never was.

I feel like I’m held back in my life
I just woke up late, I missed the alarm
And now everyone is living it
While I’m left dust of my achievements.

I feel like my dreams aren’t mine
I just leech of others
And when they remove me from them
I complain that I’m excluded

I feel like my thoughts aren’t true
That my mind keeps lying to me
But I grab them like they’re going out of stock
Even though I know they aren’t true.

I feel like my heart doesn’t beat
It stopped long ago
I’m only held up on a promise
A promise of better

But that’s just another lie.
I like it.

Look away, avert your gaze
If you don’t, you’ll be staring at my grave
It’s not your fault, I’m not in pain
I just can’t live like this, I’m always drained
My end won’t be flashy, maybe a bit ******
So please stay, just look away
What you’ll feel for a moment
Is what I’ve endured
So there’s no excuse for tears.

Renewed view, renewed thrill.
Warm waters, rushed downhill.
A new life, no old me,
Frameless soul, cold and exposed.
Does someone know;
Where to go?

Maybe I don’t feel too good
Because when I look at myself
I only see the darkness
So why are other people blinding?

Maybe I don’t feel to well
Because when I question myself
I only find the worst answers
So why does everyone else has a cheat sheet?

Maybe I don’t know anymore
Because I have a knot in my stomach
And it never goes away
So why does everyone feel so good?

Maybe I don’t feel happiness
Because I lost all feeling long ago
And only try to feel pain
So why do you have love?

Maybe I want to die
Because I feel like that I’m not good enough
But that’s just a lie
I just want to leave everyone else.

I sit down with you,
And analyse what makes everything true.
And search for what makes you me,
Cuz you don’t know it yet
But we come from the same problem tree.

I enter the room with you,
And watch what makes you hollow through and through.
And dig to find what makes us the same,
Cuz you don’t know it yet,
But I don’t want you to remain.

I eat with you,
And wonder how we brew the same brew.
And look for what unites us,
Cuz you don’t know it yet,
But I don’t like how we’re on the same bus.

I sleep with you,
And see that you cry what I spew.
And scream for you to leave me,
Cuz you don’t know it yet,
But I don’t like how I’m not free.
Free from you.

Let not your mind dwell on
such thoughts,
For they dance with morals
And toy with your brain.

Let not such evil images sit
on your soul,
For innocence is a virtue
and you are young.

Let not words harm you
they carry no weight
but can change the row
of a nation.

Let not your fear hide you:
for pain can aid you,
the tale will guide you,
and experience shall tell you
Who to trust, and who to love.

Double suicide, a modern love tale,
The ultimate act for another,
For when “love” surpasses our frail
mortal bodies, and we promise forevermore,
To dance in the void together.

My emotions are like a waterfall
I always drop from a high to a low
But when I look at it. I see beauty
My emotions are beautiful

My emotions are beautiful
They are an art, a skill to learn
But when I see them, I see complexity
My emotions are complex

My emotions are complex
They are a closed system, self-hurting
I’ve close the door to my mind
My emotions are isolated.

My emotions are beautiful
My emotions are complex
My emotions are isolated
My emotions scare me.

My hands are not my own.
Perhaps I left them back at home,
On my night stand, all alone,
Where I rest my weary phone.

These fingers are not mine!
They’re cut and bruised. Mine are all fine.
I wonder how I got the time,
I had just sat down for some wine.

I don’t understand what they feel
This was not the deal
I left them to heal

This pain in my chest, It won’t let me rest.
These thoughts in my head, I’d rather be dead.
My blood in my veins, it just leaves me stains.
Why won’t it admit, I just want to quit.
Just let it die, I don’t want to cry
But this knife in my hand, and what’s no longer my plan
No longer harms me, it only calms me.

I could have done better,
No I should have done better.
Your beautiful lies play mean
tricks on my gullible mind.
Once more, I’ll believe you.

How pathetic am I?
A shell of expectation,
A wish on a dead star.
I’m sorry that I led you on
Into the darkness even I dared not enter.

Pay no mind for tomorrow.
The sun won’t rise for me anymore
A final selfish apology, this time I mean it.
Once more, please believe me.

Grey walls surround the world;
A dull, dimmed, damp view.
The feeling of entrapment passes me,
My neutrality fuels the madness.
The walls bled together,
their shade shifts around.
Rain falls upon my eyes,
the tears streak alone.
Today was not my day;
nor will tomorrow be.

I hope, wait, pray,
for the sun to come and play.

The sun rises on our lush land,
Where friends work, hand to hand.
Where family live, a pleasant place.
Where people learn, a Student race.

Our people, happy as can be,
No quarrels, help is always free.
Never scared, our light never fades.
Forever rich, with brothers we trade.

When the bell of war, chimes it song.
We turn from the light, fight the wrong.
But fear not my brothers, remember who you are,
Dacian, through and through, spre victorie

Of course I go home with a smile
Why do you ask that?
Is it because I’ve grown tired of lying,
Or because my smile has shrunk,
I don’t know why you would say that.
I am fine.

Of course I laugh when you tell a joke
Why do you ask that?
Is it because I’ve grown tired of trying,
Or because my laugh is quieter,
I don’t understand your question .
I am fine.

Of course I have over friends,
Why do you ask that?
Is it because I’m almost crying,
Or because I feel better alone,
I don’t see your point.
I’m fine

Of course I spend time outside,
Why would you ask that?
Is it because I act like the world is dying,
Or because I say no to all your invites,
I can’t see where you stand.
I’m fine.

Of course I don’t cut myself
Why would you ask that?
Is it because I only wear hoodies,
Or refuse to take my jacket off,
I don’t understand you.
Im fine

Looking at my mirror.
I take half the of what people see
And I feel alive
For once.

I take my stolen goods to school
I run with it and smile
Why does everyone like me
For once.

I take my bought lie to my friends
I run with it and laugh
Why do my friends find me funny
For once.

I take my scars home
I run with it and talk
Why do my parents finally love me
For once.

Why don’t I feel alive
Why don’t I smile
Why don’t I laugh
Why don’t I talk
Why is my perception wrong.
Why do others know me better than I do?

Red roads rip ruthlessly
running rich regal peace.
Rapid reduction of thought,
Relentless loss of identity.
Frustration blinds the path
Relentless sun.
Runs red. Rage

Life is beautiful, yet the rain  cries
A man fled and hid under those skies

Running from what he had done wrong
Escaping while the night were long

Shelter appeared under a tree
While time forced life to come and be

Expectations slowed while my blood flowed
Rain poured while the raven  crowed

But it didn’t stop while I was under
The safety of your umbrella

I never feel emotionless, there’s always bare emotion even if I have to dig to get it
It’s always there
Just out of my reach, just a bit.
But it’s there
Safe, my cage around it.

Detached, like a house without a door,
With no light, and no safety.
Riches of life, make him so poor,
The tough giants, fall to the crazy.
Broken dreams. Tell no lies.
A chipped statue, mirror shattered,
Our river flows, the sun rises.
Knight disappears, nothing mattered.
Now you.

My life is just the worst,
All my pains, I feel like I’ll burst!
I’m not the genius I once was,
And I’ve learned many flaws!
Doesn’t that sound awful.
It’s like I’ve ripped out my heart and offal!
Her, my crush doesn’t recognise my love.
The bread I had was taken by a dove!
Mom and Dad don’t love me,
And I’m not who I thought I’d be!

But in the end,
oh well,
C’est la vie!

Deep blue burns the sky,
a gentle gust of known nothings
The sun sat; denying to fly.
Today was its lazy day.
“Oh dear sun, why won’t you try,
the air longs for your warmth”

A tired sun looks down
chuckles a little,
And rolls over.

The sun will always rise,
even when clouds cover the skies.
Rain never drowns hope for long,
joy, peace, love, all thrive in song.
So never forget what you’re worth
because you belong here, with me on Earth