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Day just started
And I'm already high.
No need to be drugged
To be this tight.

Wherever I look
I find you
Whatever I do
Becomes about you!

Not having you
Makes me weak!
Addicted, I seek!
But I can't find you
Unless, if I dream...
October 2023
the love for yourself
heals everything
END
I was drawing our future—
Two kids, two cats, maybe even two dogs,
Plus you and I.
But I had no clue
how you were writing the breakup song.

Yet  here you are once again ,
Begging me to love you,
Begging me to understand you,
Just like I used to, back in time.
(cause i used to back in time.)

but baby, we can’t go back to that.
It’s too late now—
You came too late this time.
Some things just don’t work out
You and I, my love—
That’s what we are now

All this crying and begging,
Don’t pull my heartstrings now.
It was really hard for a while,
I was so lonely at the same time.

so get off your knees ,
and stop pleading me
with those eyes.
I’ve come too far  now,
and refuse to act in the same show a second time
(won't fall for your acting for the second time)

i can't rewind
i won't even try
i'm so done with you and i

so let’s draw the curtains now
and call this the end of you and I.
The gas station had a sign
that was half burnt out -
„ _ OPE _ 24/7.“
We always joked
it matched the way the town felt.
No more lullaby,

the night hums a quiet tune—

age steals its sweet song.
sit on the tiles.
water falls as time
slips away -
drifts down the drain -

would i feel the same if i floated away?
where am i?
did the world pass me by?

should i be gone?
The ceiling looks down
corroded, broken, messy
eyes look up
glassy, lifeless, empty

Is it over yet?

Please
I can’t stand it
Where are you? Where am I?
I can’t commit to anything

Help me
Can’t you—
I think my lungs are giving up

In
Out
In
Out

They’re tired.
I am tired.

I think I’m giving up.
How are you willing to give yourself to me?
I can’t seem to get close
limbs frozen solid
Im terrified to be so open

But you’re so warm
Melt me
Arms wrap and scorch my waist
******* lips
Im still so terrified.
When will this end?
Is it too good for me to last?
Why do you love me?
When are you leaving?

Can you see me?
Im looking, but the world blends away.
There’s so much on my mind.
What about you?

Baby-
What are you thinking?
Why is it so hard to live in this moment?
What are you thinking?
Where did you go?
Are you still here?

I love you, baby-
What are you thinking?
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