You said you loved me
The scars on my skin say otherwise
You said I was your everything
The hole in my heart proves you wrong
Here I am, almost 10 years later thinking about the torture you put me through
Love has never been easy for me
Trust is almost impossible
I see the worst in my husband
You’ve ruined me
Why couldn’t you have just left me alone?
Why did you keep running back trying to convince me you were good for me?
Why was I so stupid to keep believing you?
It only took you 5 years to break me from my core
I’m not even sure I’m doing this marriage thing the right way
Because I’m so **** wrapped up in the pain that was inflicted on me those many years ago
You abused me
You ***** me
You humiliated me
YOU BROKE ME

For 9 seasons, I sat
I watched 10 years of their lives unfold in front of cameras
It was a nice break from my own reality
I enjoyed the laughs
I enjoyed the cries
I will never forget the times I laughed so hard that I cried
I gasped when I saw Michael come back
A reunion I waited so long for
“Michael. I can’t believe you actually came.”
Smiles were exchanged
Then his famous catch phrase
“That’s what she said.”
Oh how I laughed
An exaggerated knee slap laugh
Now I’m crying because it’s over
So I bid my farewell
Goodbye Michael, Jim, Pam, Dwight, Stanley, Meredith, Phyllis, Andy, Erin, Darryl, Creed, Toby, Angela, Oscar, Kevin, Kelly, and Ryan

THE ONES THAT MATTERED

A snake that she is!!
Taking a name and placing blasphemy upon it
It is a sin to lie, did you know?
What a hypocrite, you are!
I know the Lord tells me to hold my tongue.
But see, I am too— a sinner.
So I speak from anger.
Why does she start drama with her gossiping tongue?
Does she not have her own life to worry about?
Does mine entertain her more?
Mind your own, you snake!
Be gone, I demand of thee!
BE GONE

Me? I am "The One That Got Away," you say.
You? The one who took too long.
Us? Never going to happen; a thing in the past.
Do I ever stray away from reality and think about the "what ifs"?
Of course.
But that's in another life.
In another life, I might be yours.
But I think about the things I wouldn't have if I ended up with you.
Most importantly, my son.
He plays a crucial role in the woman I have been shaped into today.
I can never give that up.
Any children I may have had with you wouldn't have shaped me in the way my little boy has.
I love my husband. I really do.
Were we a wrong fit for each other at one point?
Absolutely.
But in the two years he and I were split up, I prayed for him every single day.
I prayed that he'd better himself.
Not for me.
Not even for our son. (Although that was very helpful)
But for HIMSELF.
He was miserable with the life he was living.
I truly believe I was placed in his life for a reason.
As he was for me.
So, sorry.
For now.
And probably forever.
I will remain...
THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY