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Cat
Jena T Apr 2020
Cat
Sitting in the sun,
Like it rose for them.
Opening one eye,
To glare and gaze.
All belongs to them,
That can of tuna better be shared.
Goddesses come to play with us,
A gift we should think.
Rough licks and kneeding biscuits
On your skin
It's affection,
So what if it hurts?
Take it like the slave you are
You never own a cat.
Written as my cat sits on my lap purring and sticking her claws in me unbeknownst of the pain she causes.
Jena T Feb 2020
There is a man who lives on a corner
Where students live, right next to the practice fields.
He's older and a smoker
He stands on the corner everyday
At a four-way stop
Smoking one after another.
I've seen him in snow, bitter cold and sweltering hot days.
Always smoking
He's out all day it seems,
Watching the cars pass by
Pausing in confusion because they don't know how to obey a stop sign.
I think he must laugh sometimes
Watching the world pass by.
I've seen him for years but I've never known his name
He almost seems like an old friend sometimes
I pass by and see him there nearly every time
I always wonder why
What led him to a life of smoking all the time?
I know the answer I heard it one time,
A veteran who didn't come back alright,
people whisper in shame as they pass by.
But his eyes are a genuine kind.
He smokes, killing time.
I wonder if he's just waiting to die
But still I see him and he brings a smile to mind.
To the man on the corner, smoking all the time.
A short story for a cloudy Sunday
Jena T Feb 2020
It came about in the strangest way.
My heart sitting on the divide
Wondering why.
The fault was never in the stars
Ceasar is not better than me.
It was written this way
Three fates cutting strings.
Arts and wars
Walking through doors.
Death's wife sleeping in the night
It was written all before.
For my history teacher who taught me the importance of understanding the way the ancients thought.
Jena T Dec 2019
I've been formally trained
Yes I've brewed some strange things
And I've dissected some things
I know where Frankenstein got his name
But the craft I practice I never learned
It's the purest of the trades
And it's stronger than any compound I've ever made
I've distilled it many times
Till it was pure
Just a drop is all you need
Stronger than any liquor
Trust me I could brew no ninety proof that could compete
Just a sip is all you need
A sip of the purest pain
Aged through the decades
Wouldn't my old professors be proud?
I think not
Only the Philosophers and Poets would nod their heads without doubt
The rest surely know I've abandoned all they taught me
A brilliant scientist I'll never be
But come to me when all is broken and gone away
I'll give you a taste of my brew
Perhaps I can still become a healer
I know the body but it is your soul that needs mending
So pull up a chair and sit on down
I once was a scientist but I've given it all away
For this pain that stretches through us all
Tell me what you think and I'll let you have a drink
We'll grieve together and it'll be okay.
Jena T Mar 2020
A swath of fabric worn and old
Patches upon patches
The shoulders worn beyond repair
No protection from the bitter cold
Hardly a coat to protect the little man
Who hurries along the cobbled streets
Of his cold and clouded city
A denizen of little want
Serving mother Russia with little pay
Harldy enough to buy a new cloak
He douses his candles to save them
And steps lightly to save his shoes
To buy a new cloak to keep him warm
A necessity giving hope in his dreary life
Brightening his mood
He steps out in his new cloak
That he scrimped and saved for a year
Feeling like a rich man in his warmth
A few days of happiness bought
A great expense for a lowly man
Taken by harsh men of ill repute
So broken was the little man
He died very soon
Haunting the people of his city
For the cloak taken from him.
Jena T Sep 2021
Harken the dark
In gulps and gasps
How easy it is born
Quenching itself
On a soft light
A candle amidst a black night
A friend or foe?
Empty and alone
Rushing in
Black waves of oceans cold
Home below
Beats a frozen sound
It's gotten so loud
The candle has lost its glow
And there is no one around
Jena T Jul 2020
Come back to us,
My son so sweet
A face too young to be taken away.
My daughter,
Drawn away to this careless world
It does not deserve your grace.
My loves,
I am with you in every breath
It will always be this way.
Torn away by petty things and historical mistakes.
I will never send you away,
I wait with warm embrace
Do not leave a folded flag in its place.
Come back to us
We wait,
Every generation a dying race
But a mother always waits.
Jena T May 2020
Sprawling hills interspersed with trees
Ah it felt like home
Like driving down a barren road
Cities aren't for me
Don't get me wrong
I like the hustle and faces I see
But I'll take the quiet land
No matter the nation it is,
I call the country home
From the cliffs of Gibralter
To the ruins of Gobekli Tepe,
And back round to the massive Red Wood trees,
I'll roam
Down to the burning sands of Berber lands,
I'll stay in the country
Leave the cities to the people
And listen to the trees.
Jena T Jun 2020
Mountains, cover me
Sands upon my sleeves
Take me down to the sea
My sails of sleep
Let my burdens drown
Down to the watery deeps
Let my soul run free
Up to the mountain peaks
Snowy caps, cover me
To my knees
Cold air grant sweet release
I'm coming down
Where the ground rises up to meet
The sky and ocean black
Sparks set free
Fires, cover me
One more round
Of air in my lungs
Battle worn and ready now
Cover me until I'm complete
Jena T Feb 2020
Strung up for all to see
Hanging lifelessly
I see no reason to think you mighty.
It's one thing to ****
Another to hang it like a morbid trophy
No respect for the life it was,
Return it to the field and let it be
A beauty it once was even if you couldn't see.
Hanging corpses by the roadside
What have we become?
Or have we returned to the Romans of old?
Maybe some dumb kids with nothing better to do but chase a Coyote.
It hangs,
A sign we still have far to come
Before we can claim we are humanity.
Jena T Jan 2022
I’ve knelt to these blows

Taken my lumps of coal

It’s hardened my bones

Scarred my soul

Now they say it’s time to go

Rise above the smoke

Though my fire burns cold

The mask is gone that hid the old
Cup
Jena T Aug 2020
Cup
An artist's cup
Full and empty all at once
Schrödinger's cat in another life
Second sight coupled with the afterlife
Feeling a little too much
Artists need a place to bleed
Somewhere to be free
Riddled artistry
A cup of gravity
Unique to each who drinks
Crafted by creativity
Drained by objectivity
An everlasting cup
Filled with hopes and dreams
Pains and philosophies
Jena T Nov 2020
Part of me sees better than me
It makes decisions without consulting
At times I wish I could change them
Cupid is no baby
A cherub bringing sweet Valentines
He's a hardened mercilous god
Beautiful in right alone
Devastating as Hades home
I'd like to say Cupid struck
You are kind and I genuinely enjoy your company
But he laughs at me
Cruelly
Dangling my heart before me
It aches so much I've nearly given up the race
My dear be patient with me
Forgive me
I am playing with gods
Who have not finished with me
Jena T Mar 2020
Writing in the night
Marking this heart
With each layer
The marks are deeper
The screams are louder
And the darkness is thicker.
Sick or gifted?
Both speak of their brilliance.
Leaving a figure much different
Her face is calm and eyes cool
Her expression alludes to something cruel
She's grown up hard,
I worry she'll lose,
What's left of the child inside.
I pray none will cross her
For the darkness she exudes
Could crush even the strongest of virtues.
Jena T Jan 2020
A voice echoed in the dark,
Even through the light of day
It was smooth and cut deep
Making my skin crawl and eyes weep,
It pries at my deepest thoughts and sweetest dreams
Of all that is and will never be,
When it comes I grimace and wait
For the five words it always says,
"Does it make you hate?"
Jena T Oct 2021
Midnight
Her solemn gaze,
Fade into black with hints of cold light
Her echoed name,
Ghostly foggy breeze
Her sweet lullaby,
Thrice times the raven calls
Her wisest words,
Winters harshest night,
Her gentle kiss,
Little one
Your laugh is the brightest day,
Youth's grace,
Your smile is full of ease,
Dear,
Your tears raise life from barren seeds,
Lady,
You're heart bleeds life into dying days,
Aged and grey,
Your eyes don't hold back
O' moon up high
Hear the chant
Born to death and life
Endless cycles
A daughter's craven namesake.
Jena T Mar 2020
I was ten and you were fourteen
I thought you were the coolest thing.
Our families were close.
My father liked you and your father wasn't there.
Those were early days
Skaters were in and Green Day was sick.
I was a kid and probably bothered you
But you treated me like the younger sister you didn't have
And I worshiped you like any younger sibling would do.
You taught me to snowboard,
"Keep your toes up and I'll teach you how to jump."
You let me have some of your Rockstar
And I stayed up all night.
You'd make sure I was by your side
And if anyone got rough you'd push them out of the way.

My family moved away one day.
You'd visit but distance made it hard.
Age and struggles muddled it all.
I was fifteen when I saw the look on my father's face.
He said you died, the call came earlier that day.
Overdosed on stuff you took for ADHD.
They said it may have been a mistake
But deep down I know it wasn't.
You were smart and knew how that stuff worked.
You were in a rock and a hard place.
I felt the same when I was your age.
I can't snowboard to this day without thinking of you.
Playing Green Day on the CD player
And nodding our heads real cool.
Boulevard of Broken Dreams was written for you.
Things I associate with you feel like Deja vu.
David I still think of you.
To my friend David who died shortly after turning twenty. I'm afraid he was alone and when someone finally came they offered no hope. The specifics of it all were lost and uncertain. Suicide is a frightening word and no one wanted to say that's what happened to him. He was kind when many chose not to be and perhaps that's why he left so soon.
Jena T May 2020
Why do they hurt?
A morning of overwhelming ache
Of the day ahead
Cleansed with a shower
But the voices never fade
Afternoons bright with light
I've always hated mid-day
The evening brings some peace
But the fear of night lurks
Relax enough as eyes grow dim
Sleep permits some fitful peace
Dreams and nightmares await
The best go far the worst further
3 am wakes with a sweaty start
A song or a voice of another brings relief
The next few hours are a coin flip of sanity
By dawn the battle has wore me weak
From restless sleep
The twilight mists disappear
And the cycle begins again
There must be sweet release.
Jena T Jan 2020
A deadly rose I hold
Thorned with fear
It pierces my hands as I hold
This deadly rose
Black in stem and spotted in woes
It tangles through my fingers and toes
Wrapping itself through my soul
This deadly rose
Beautiful and cold.
Jena T Sep 2020
Do you hear the creak?
Of the wooden sign breaking free
This is Dead Man's Ranch
The horses died long ago
And the cattle don't graze any more
The plains wait for none
Thundering clouds beating down
On this blood soaked ground
A sacred town
Of dead and cultures long gone
Beneath the dusty bones
Are the lives who worked this ground
Can you hear their shouts?
Few can hear these calls
This country life is dying now
The last son loaded what father gave him
A piece of lead to protect this hallowed ground
Here he sits with the dead all around
Saying nothing as the dust stirs
The final beat of generations sound
Dead Man's Ranch
Listen now
Jena T Oct 2021
If the dead answered our calls
Would they tell us all they knew?

Wisdom of all those before we came
Would they reach out from graves
Or some nether place as the poets say,
To tell us the secrets of today and yesterday?

If the dead spoke
Would it be like a parent comforting a child?
Or a haunting cold of nightmarish souls?

Heaven and hell
Our daily landscapes
Dead speaking each and every day
Whispers in our bones
And shadows at the edge of our gaze

Perhaps this soul already came
And I'm speaking of yesterday.
Jena T May 2020
Water tips just above the glass
As spinning records skip
Cracks among the walls
Light is coming through
So are voices speaking strangely too
Radio set till electricity knocks it dead
You've seen this dance
Felt the sway and movement in your hips
Have you lived,
Until you've experienced the skip?
A distant call reminding you this isn't it
A calling card,
You're mind stretches beyond this.
Jena T Jun 2020
I've walked the desert
Through the dust and barren seas
I've dreamed of water
On the hottest days
I've felt the hot winds on my face
As tumbleweeds scratched my legs
I've wished for relief as my skin bakes
Wondering how much I can take
Today I collapsed
The desert had claimed too much
I laid in the dust,
Watching the sun pass
Burning my tears
I laid until the moon appeared
It told me to get up
My body feels weak
And incomplete
The desert has drained me
And now has come to rescue me
From certain defeat
Jena T Dec 2019
There is nothing quite like a desert rain
Dark clouds cover the sky
Masking the sun that always shines
The air goes quiet and the ground takes a breath
Then the clouds break and water falls
You'll see the desert lives
In the grass that grows and the birds who sing
As soon as it comes it will go
And you will smile because you know
A secret not many know
The desert lives and you saw its beauty grow
A rarity and a treasure trove
Of a place harsh and unforgiving
With a heart of gold
DNA
Jena T Jun 2020
DNA
Strands bound tight in a double helix
They unravel and copy every day
Thousands of generations in you
Why your eyes are blue or your skin a certain hue
A, T, G, C
Let me tell you of their blend,
A is always fated with T though sometimes T becomes U,
G is always with C no matter if another letter saunters by saucily.
It's tricky when we say why we love or why we dream to name a gene
Scientists argue if it's all you'll ever be
Two parents giving 50% each
It's a long name DNA
I won't name it here, I'll save the space
Instead I'll say as one whose watched it replicate
It makes mistakes and sometimes that isn't great
It's a marvelous thing and I can see why we never truly die
Some person you never knew is directly responsible for you
Despite its beauty I've noticed one thing,
In all its complexity it only partly describes you
It will long live after you die
Maybe giving your great grandkids freckles in an odd place
But it doesn't say why you loved or laughed
It may say why you were prone or not
But that's all it can say
These words here do that more than that
DNA is a wonder and I've studied it till my head ached
But I'd rather read what you have to say
Because that's our condition
DNA will continue long after you and me
But your mind is a horrible thing to waste
Jena T Feb 2020
I walked away
To a different night
To a different life
A dream of another time
If I'm alive how come I go?
If I die, will I come alive?
I walked away tonight,
Left this life
In the morning perhaps I'll return.
Jena T Jun 2020
I dripped tonight
Slid down the way
Warm little drops
Wet and sweet
Didn't realize they were there
Till I felt them run down my face
Wondering why they came
Knowing they've been at bay
Jena T Feb 2020
To the Aspen covered peaks
To the sage valleys below
I go.
When it's a little too loud
Or the walls close in too close
I go.
Driving to escape time
Running on fumes in my mind
Hoping I'll get somewhere this time.
Turn the music on high
Leave the crystal blue skies
Or the bitter cold behind
I go.
Big sky country
Iron mountains high
Dinosaur bones below
Send me home.
I drive to pass the time,
See the sky,
And clear my mind.
Taking empty roads
Where many never go.
Dry
Jena T Aug 2020
Dry
Been looking in my well as of late
Saw my reflection on the watery face
I don't have much to say
There was plenty to hear
But I didn't want to listen
I was tired of its watery song
It's been quiet as of late
Leaving me with my wintry soul
It weaves and blows
Its direction unknown
Always returning with a story
Been looking in my well
Saw my watery face
Never dry as silence unfolds
Jena T Apr 2020
I watched myself die that night
I watched my mother cry
It broke my heart to see her so

I struggled to get free
But the red dirt wouldn't let me go
I was trapped
Left to travel this strange place

When I demanded to be freed
He said I was dead and to leave it be
If I wished to leave this place
I must accept that I am no longer me

I looked at my mother
Frightened to leave her alone
But I couldn't return
And I was tired of the red
So I admitted I was dead

I found release
Until I woke
And thought what a strange dream
A few years have passed since

I see now the dream was true
I died that night
I didn't return
The girl I was died to the woman I became

I don't know if this person is better than the one before
She's hard and complex in many ways
My mother lost her daughter to me
I've been trying to reclaim my simpler days

Futile hopes woven into passing dreams
Choking on these words
They're smoother than they used to be
The darkness is no longer a shadow to me

I died that night
But I didn't realize it until today
I must have been a zombie.
Jena T Apr 2020
If you went to war over me,
Would you claim subtlety?
If you killed another over me,
Would you weep for them and me?
If you died in my arms,
Would you remember when I kept you warm?
If you must fight over me,
Know I'll accept you as I do with every child that's come to be
I'll cover you in the dirt and keep you safe hoping for the day you'll see you never had to die over me.
Jena T Mar 2022
Kissed by a storm
For the moon to see,
Sheathed in naked form
Floating on the open sea

No need to breathe
As the rains pour
And lightening weaves,
Through the body’s core

Gentle patter,
Torrential storm,
Deep water
Wetting dry bones

Wild eyes,
Fresh from heavenly skies
Soiled toes,
Dusky from hellish lies

Welcome the storm inside
Jena T Sep 2020
Waters edge
Horizon line
Knelt beside
Drinking cool light
Currents swiftly passing by
Of nocturnal light

The edge of creation
Event horizon's light
The void pulls tight
Wrapped in rings
Drifting inside
I wonder
About the light
And dark

Mates
Whispering sweet carnal things
Of destruction and delight,
Morning dew
A lovely hue
Burned by day
Frozen by night

The edge of light
Dancing like it'll never die
Immortal taste of life
Brash and defined
Luminescent
Passionate
Etherally wise
Bringing tears to eyes
Jena T Feb 2020
Chasing dreams
Of a sleeping reality
Muses whispering many things
My delusions of my illusions
Chasing perfection
With broken perception
Enter this elusive house
Filled with incantations written during conception.
Jena T Jul 2020
A warrior crouched down
As battle raged around
This one was lost
Defeat was heard in the horns sound
The last remnants of a once great power
Fading into the stars around
A warrior buried his failure
And took its lessons
For another day
When the time comes to bring his Empire out from under the shroud.
Jena T Sep 2020
I wrote a dozen poems in one night
A dip into memoryscape
Take my hand and hold it tight
I've remembered the way
A place of serenity in my sights
My footsteps mark the place
I need a companion to remind me it's alright
Someone to grant me a little time
To reassure the pillar of its might
Wise man's knowing why
Needs the understanding Seer's eyes
The soldier needs to hold his weapon tight
The traveler needs a memory of home
And the seeker needs to know there is light
Empty eyes need sight
Relief comes one step away
Do not grieve me as I go
Empty eyes have glimpsed a sight
Jena T Jan 2020
I write tonight.
Nothing great or in pretty lines,
Just a little pain of mine.
Of loss and heaviness.
Some days I can forget
But in wee hours I drop the lies and gaze at the little things.
Love lost, people gone, desires unmet, and the madness of the mundane.

It opens questions so I write.
Often it's to a friend, my never reader
But when it's right I write for someone to see
Perhaps for me and partly for others
For those that need
A reminder that even alone it's never completely so.
I write of a little pain,
With this in mind:
Pain is a drug that runs in my soul and maybe that is why I never let it go.
Jena T Feb 2020
I see you here,
I see you there,
I see you everywhere.
A ghost walking amidst my eyes
Speaking thoughts of a different life.
What dreams I forsake to gaze upon your face.
One last taste of this sweet pain before I turn away.
I'd give it all to see your face one more time,
But it's not yet time to join the dying kind.
Jena T Apr 2020
If the world went away,
Would you stay?
Hold your hand in mine,
Till the end of time?
Through the smiles and the cries,
Till the daylight dies?
If your eyes hold that light,
I'll stay with you every night.
Jena T Sep 2020
I saw life and death,
Life in this here afterspell
For all its horror and beauty
It was an aftersight,
While death wore weary eyes
Begging for one more sleepless night

From all the fires of dying eyes
To the fields of pure sight
I saw myself wander from dusk to morning light
My memorial engraved in stone
My life with no dates to divine
How I came or left undefined
Time a mere observer of my soul's journey of the night

Leaves of amber and red
Yet remains of smoky skies
A dying year preparing for winter's cold embrace
Linear shadows facing away
While mine bends the light
A serene grieving time
Grieving is rejoicing another's life
Jena T Nov 2021
Dawn and dusk sit at the edges of my sight
Night sky waits when I close my eyes
Day was foreign sky
Me feet carried me across starry sands
An endless ocean of black
Weighted with the comforts of home
Gravity holding me tight
Though vacuous and cold I felt loved
As if the stars and comets knew my sound
And plants and moons greeted me as kin
Jena T May 2020
I feel it in my bones
Going to feel it tonight
Isn't glorious
What you can do with a light
Going to feel it when I'm old
Whipping in the wind
Like a child's lost balloon
Coming in the storm
Going to feel it coming through
So much to lose
If that ain't life
What to do
Going to ride till the call comes through
Yeah that's just a clue
Jena T Jan 2020
I write because I've had enough,
Of days and nights above
Drowning me with no love
Asking for more when I gave enough,
For blood, sweat and years
Every knock at the door,
Asking for a little more
I choose not answer anymore
I've had enough, you hear
Push anymore and I'll surely swing
I don't live an angry life
But do not think me weak
I do not hold the fears you breed,
Threaten with death or poverty
I do not care,
I do not bow,
My enemy is mine,
There is a darkness in me
And I have made peace with it, you see
If you have come to take,
I will make you bleed.
Jena T Nov 2020
Have you heard the call home?
Do your dreams speak of the untold?
Does your inner world breathe life all of its own?

A bird of lofty heights soars
Its call a beautiful longing
Claiming the skies home

Pain written in lyric lines
Of caged rage
And nooses of rough twine

Snowy nights
Followed by sunny days
Whittling sticks of time

How's it all relate?
Freedom is a dangerous game
It flies in the face of proclaimed right

The heart betrays they say
The mysteries await
Enter Fate
Jena T Feb 2020
I have a fear
Of something real
And something dear
No matter the lies I tell it's clear,
I hurt and so I fear,
A stranger who nears
It's love I fear.
Jena T Feb 2020
A soul who roams isn't home.
In dying throes we know,
What the darkness holds.
Close your eyes one last time,
And remember home.
My dearest friend,
I'll hold your hand as you go.
A fellow traveler I know,
This isn't what we call home,
But I enjoyed your company before you had to go.
I'll keep your memory safe with me,
Till I leave this place and journey home.
For a friend.
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