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Jun 2019 · 158
Suicide Awareness
Jey Jun 2019
Suicide feelings,
Suicidal thoughts,
Lost my train of thought

Forgetting all that was taught,
Give away every thing i bought

Take everything! Take everything!

Nothing to my name,
Nothing to become

Everything I've ran from
Out of the picture, out of the frame!

What's my name?
What's this game?
How do you play?

Read me with your xray but stay in your lane

Can't be basic, livin plain,
Can't go back where i came,

The boy with no home
Through the night I roam,
Why am I to blame

Life I can not tame,
So much shame

My nine to my brain,
Suicidal thoughts as i aim

Couldn't write a suicidal note,
I'm afraid ill choke

A lost hope so let go of the rope!
The battle of depression.
Jun 2019 · 136
The moment of a broken soul
Jey Jun 2019
Blunt in my hand,
I'm the man

The man for the moment and I own it

Can't find many ways to show it, In the moment i cherish it

So let me bury it, deep with in a broken soul with a smile on my face

Rainy days i think of this day,
Oh why i know this is one of a kind

Looking at you,
You're one in a million
I wouldn't trade you for a billion

So confined in you,
So confident i can show my flaws around you

One lucky man to have you to hold
If i had knew your touch would be so cold

Blinded by false hopes,
Guided by the lies i've been told

For the monster i've become,
Speechless by the smoke that fills my lungs

She's cancerous, addiction so hard to cut,
Open me up, So easy to love

Play so rough
Wake me up buried in the dirt

Masking my emotions,
Leave me before its able to show

So Don't wait on me,
I won't show

I won't come, so please stop trying to make me

Baby, please don't make me
I'll show you what it takes to feel like me, move like me
Love like me

Feel the lost ones
So im on one

Couldn't just take one,
I know you feel the lust too

There's no trust between us two
I've got to much to lose
To much to feel nothing

So high in the moment
Pass the blunt, start the movement
Only doing what is meant

Only regretting the last message I've sent,
Letting you vent,
Leaving me bent in many ways

Coming alive inbetween the plays
Don't get caught up as we lay

There was nothing more to say
let me seize the day

Need to ease the pain
Unbrella the rain
The mystery of what's real or not.
Jan 2019 · 345
Never Wanted Me!
Jey Jan 2019
Love is never what you wanted.
I hope you got what you wanted from me.

You took everything I had left of me.
There's nothing left of me.

Having nothing left to lose.
I'm so far gone.

There's nothing left for me to do
I only want you, only you.

What do you need to prove?
So irrelvent its old news.

Old memories that once meant something to me.
You didn't need to do me like that.

Feeling ashamed for wanting you back.
Missing the way you act.

When I told you I loved you,
It was a fact.

It's not romance I lack.
Leaving me asking where were you at?

Replaying the last words you said to me.
Thinking of messaging you.
I just can't picture you replying to me.

Missing you lying with me.
Never needed you lying to me.
About a girl that i once knew!
Dec 2018 · 134
(666)
Jey Dec 2018
Cant I just love myself,
Cant I be someone else,
Cant you love me for me,

Tell me you'll die with me
As skies come caving in,
held as angels surround

Hell waits, I'll come apon,
My sins stay around me,
These demons just clown me

Please Feel free to bruise me,
Abuse me or use me,
Clean me off then feed me,

Love me, I hate myself,
waiting on something new,
you used me til I'm dry,

In these words aren't lies,
These feelings I disguise,
Lay secrets about life,

Learned how you live your life,
Your habits became mine,
Yours, I sacrifice mine.
Dec 2018 · 86
Butterfly
Jey Dec 2018
I am just a butterfly camouflaged by my horrid wings
Taking flight from damaging things

Only tempting to land on what looks to comfortable to be true
Only to find what hides behind the beauty of nature

Still hovering seeking a place so secure as I'm recovering and suffering from what took place

never forgetting but shedding from my past
Forecasting my shell to what I've grown in

As if being forced to crawl before i was able to fly
Having to heal from my sorrows before i can soar

as it was all meant to be, I'm just now able to see
casting out of my shell to be who I'm supposed to be
Dec 2018 · 238
Helpless Bliss
Jey Dec 2018
I think im Helpless
Some would say im helpful

I really need some help
Im indecisive

Make this situation easier for me
Make a decision for me

Im pretty sure i wasted all my opportunities
So what more does life want from me

Theres nothing left to take from me
Wishing i can wash away my past
Looking forward to a better me

Instead waiting here taking a knee
Everyday waiting for a plea

Not knowing which direction my life is going
Just wondering how its still going

— The End —