I love with a ragged hope
that he will come to me
while trying to go on with my life
in a happy way

I don’t see you
You don’t see me
Not really

good bye girl
thank you for your place in this world
I appreciated your company
and your protective iron-y
your hope, compassion,
self deprecating wit
I admired your honesty
and that whole **** bit
I still love him
so I’m sure I’ll still visit
but as far as it goes
I think this is it

processing loss is a very dangerous job
the machines are terrifying
the hours are long
and the pay is terrible

it appears there has been a miscommunication
my apologies
it is a lovely day here in New England
I hope you have a good evening

the square knot is simple
yet easily misunderstood
I admire it’s elegant symmetry
and strength
it is very reliable and can even be
quite unconventional
despite the misleading name

time is delicious this evening
sweet and spicy
deep and rich
like Mexican chocolate
or cinnamon elixir

time is content tonight
heavy and smooth
drunk with svelte pollen
over slick naked petals
and bowed branches rocking

time exists carelessly independent of me
unconcerned and lazy in it’s duties
telling me an inside joke
remember that time, he says…
and I see a small distant warmth

you are always one step ahead of me
as I chase you across the night

I don’t like the way he looks at me sometimes
he looks at me the way I wanted you to

it seems the crazy train has left the station
hopefully chugging some other kool aid
cause this kool aid is mine

sometimes there’s not enough time in a life to heal
lovers lose
children die
hearts are never found
and we just laugh laugh laugh ourselves to the nearest grave
the life is still beautiful though
course it is

every night at this time
someone is tapping
on my mind

dear rain
please
stop!
I have to paint!
I have important Things to do!
my porch is not going to finish remodeling itself!

also
my flowers want me to tell you
so I will
begrudgingly
and contrary to my own desires…

thank you

Giant monsters
House monsters
Dismemberments
Gory car accidents
Decapitations
Forest monsters
Shadowy faceless figures following me
Falling off cliffs
Falling off tightropes
More monsters of assorted types
Sharks
Sea monsters
****** torturing me (I’m not Jewish)
Burning chemicals in my eyes
Being shot in the chest

Also, I was naked in school a few times
but that wasn’t really scary

it has been the slowest tide in millennia
the moon went traveling to a distant star
leaving the ocean in such a state
lovers are lost
wolves are incensed
the estrus is in peril
meanwhile
the tide drags itself out
foam curling like lazy toes under bed covers
rising against gravity
disappearing momentously
up
into a serpentine mountain of water
reaching
for its fading mate
the moon

the wave holds time
inside the precipice of its crash
a breathless, silent
pause

the moon looks back, gently
seeing only a warm farewell

I love her course hands
the scoring on each finger
like the tread of a tractor tire
wise with wrenches and grease
she will tell you what to do
just like a man
so obnoxious and confident
she’s a study in authentic masculinity
I’m mesmerized
by her imperfection
and competence
in all matters of this life

can we?
can’t we?

red ***, meet green kettle
behave yourselves now

every time you write you say something senseless or cruel
so don’t write
don’t think
speak
or forget me forever
just forget me forever

My brain isn’t trying to make sense anymore
My heart clings to the feeling it wants
I am frozen in your winter

I dreamed I was at a massive train station
but there were too many trains
and I didn’t know which one to take
I couldn’t see the numbers on the trains
or read the schedule
or remember what the map said
then I started crying
so I walked

walking in the dark
holding hands
bashfully
no one has ever
innocent kisses
lips exploring
joyfully
no one has ever
waiting loving hoping
waiting trusting
patiently
no one has ever
betrayal lies fear
forgiveness
betrayal betrayal betrayal
no one has ever
she didn’t come
you didn’t come
you never came
no one has ever

I am suspended in a healing euphoria
I haven’t felt this for so long
my connection to greater self seemed blocked
but I am expanding now
a minor ecstatic state
integrated with my mind
swelling in my chest
my limbs are numb and beautiful
the dimensions are folding loosely inside me
portals opening
I feel an incorruptible power and purity
a gentle ineffable pleasure of peace
and rightness
in truth, I do not know what it is
I call it energy, spirit, light
I call it Love
I call it Self

never ending spin
thread, spin, thread
spin
weightless baby bird

maybe
will only get you so far
but most of the world’s population has not realized this
as they bow their heads in prayer

don’t worry, I won’t touch you
anywhere

the waves are crashing
I am a happy pleaser
the season is glorious
I am a beautiful brain teaser

I’m not sure how this is better
than the traditional approach
it sure feels worse than anything I’ve ever experienced
how about for you?

— why are you so squirmy?
— because when I get hugged and kissed I get super super happy, and I like squirming around

hello poetry should change its name to
Not A Dating Site
there are lots of other sites for that
and they work pretty well
in my experience

humans are social creatures
like dogs
we’re not meant to be alone

troubled sleep
woke up in full delusion mode
you were him again
it was disturbing
depressing
destabilizing
I woke up in love

I had so much love this morning
I drowned my dog in it
now he’s following me everywhere close behind
staring at me with star glazed eyes
tail permanently raised as a flag of devotion
I’m the key to his happy portal
and somehow that makes him mine

dear Mr. Postman
I have shoveled the walk for you every time
every storm
every morning
every single day
sometimes twice a day
so please
please please
pretty please
no more bills

I would like to take your hand
lead you down a path of never ending blooms
the way it is in my heart
when I think of you

I would like you to take my hand
and lead me down a peaceful street
I would like you to hug me in the shade
tell me I’m great
it will all be ok
pull my head to your shoulder
pet my hair
I would like to rest
there
in the comfort of you

you tell me
do I see you?
do I see
all of you
yet
in the smoke
in the mirrors
in the moonlight…?

because I feel you

everywhere

that’s never going to happen
this is just
a Lesson
I hear life is full of them
(shrugs dubiously)

trust is only as valuable
as the life you’re trying to preserve

in ten thousand years
our descendants will study a strange people
who worshipped Mew and Arceus
they will study the seventh millennium war
fought between the two sects over who came first,
who was most powerful
Arceus, god of the universe
or Mew, the first being, who beget Arceus
they will read about a third sect
who hid from persecution from both
the worshippers of Pika,
the mouse goddess of lightning

the Pokelogic cosmology
will be a fairly obscure niche of study
our ten thousand year descendants will overwhelmingly be worshippers of
the ancient goddess Tik
and her consort Tok

the solar system is spiraling
towards a new constellation
creating new wonders

I’m only halfway back
it’s ok, it’s a meaningful journey
and I’m feeling optimistic

I wrote you lots more poems
with all the same feelings

I don’t want to think about my mistakes, confusions, or pains
I just want to be with you in this moment,
and as many moments as I can,
for the rest of our days

when I woke this morning
the sun was gentle
the breeze was cool
I found new blooms on a flower I thought was dead
the cherry tomatoes in my garden turned red
the pit in my stomach dissolved
and turned into a fire in my mind
the fear is not vanquished
but at least I have a sword to fight it
it’s the most wonderful kind of day there is
thank you angels
for putting me back together

strange but I was jealous of your Italian girl
even though you don’t care for her at all
are in fact, quite heartless towards her

but I am not jealous of Faith
he loves her
not me
there’s nothing for me to lose

I think it’s a positive development
that these days when I’m thinking
“idiot”
I’m mostly thinking you
and not me

the screams in my dreams
are not nightmares
though there is a monster

I have to get something off my chest…

I love cheese dip
and I’m not talking about fancy cheese dip
I mean straight out of the tin
100% processed, chemical
no cheese involved cheese dip

also

** **’s
man, that’s just childhood bliss
pure preservative laden childhood bliss
that’s “my mom loves me and life is good” sugar

corn dogs
who doesn’t love corn dogs?
minions of satan that’s who
and orange crush
peanut m&ms
******* jack popcorn
there was a cheap toy inside
a tattoo, or a plastic ring…

I was one of those kids
innocent, hopelessly naive, vulnerable

and

******* world

I still am

my gleeful innocence is investigating
my human foolishness
with joyful detachment
my soul is emanating a deafening love
keeping everyone company