Only a man can be truly alone
A woman has inherent value
But a man
Is only valuable as to what he can provide

I am divided in two because I loss my best friend at age 15.
Sometimes I am delusional. Sometimes my thoughts make no sense.
Sometimes my words slur in mid-conversation. Sometimes I can't feel anything at all. Sometimes I have no motivation to eat or sleep.
Sometimes the voices in my head aren't my own and I want to scream at them to shut up. I will not romanticize my mental condition.
I am giving a voice to a personal issue of mine. Do that make me insane? No, just aware. Movies make my condition a horror movie or a thriller movie. It is neither something that controls me or makes me a lunatic. Maybe I am just more strong willed than most people with my condition. My mental illness doesn't make me any less human.
I could argue that it makes me more human. Do I sound insane bringing up my symptoms? Maybe I don't know what normal is.

You must love me
Oh, no, but you must, you must!
I am the muse they request to sing
in your old, beloved books
I am the twinkling butterfly
Over a thousand darkened blooms
Life twirls around on my palm
Deathlessness sleeps
Love me, love me
Mustn’t you now?
I have whirled and withered
Since the morn
Of this endless mourn
I have heard all smothered wails

Must you sway
In your precarious little trance,
must you?
You sure do know
A thing or two of heaven
But a thing or two merely
Must you love me, oh must!
I could tell you a dozen more

Death surrenders his cloak
For my dresses
Must you see—
I am a snowy woman kissing
Her mulberry love
I lurk on the vivid edges
Of an infant’s dream

You must hear me,
You must now, you must!
I have pushed my way through
The froth
That settles on the surface of the stirring sky
And I fight on,
Hum, oh I hum
One upon another lullaby
Luring the day to sleep
Must you love me!
Must you not?

Bruised and scarred
I have a hundred tales of beauty
Unheard
Must you ask,
Oh, must you ask only!
You sure do know some secrets
Of godhood, but
Must you ask me about yourself
Ask, ask, mustn’t you ask!

Love me!
O you peace-less, fluttering moths
The sun smirks an immortality away
Must you love me
For a single night, must you!
I wait, I wait
I count your molten bodies
That dreamed of kissing
The mighty sun
Counting, recounting

I wait, I wait
Then curl away in my lone vacancy
I wait
Then bloom again
Uncountable deaths I have died
Reborn only for you
Must you,
Oh, must you love me
Mustn’t you?

I shine a full goddess tonight
See me, ask and ask
I have so much of living
To spare
Oh must you love me
Love me—