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Mbali-Enhle May 2020
Let ME just start by saying:
I've come to realise something
About our relationship, that's actually heart breaking...
You may think that I'm lying
Or perhaps dying
I know after this you'll need some healing

But babyy
The person that was making you happy
Was also making ME happy.
That person is ME.

What actually made ME happy
Was the fact that I'm making you happy
Not that you made ME happy

Truth is
Im the one for you
But you're not the one for ME
Mbali-Enhle May 2020
I miss you everytime i think about you
I miss you everytime i achieve something
I miss you everytime i doubt my capabilities
I miss you everytime I'm lonely, hurt, disappointed and depressed

Yeah people come and go
And i know
That it happened 7 years ago
But it still hurts like crazy.
Mommy it's no secret that I'm holding on to you and i refuse to let you go.

I refuse to forget about you
I'd rather stay this miserable knowing it's making me feel closer to you
Than being happier and forgetting about you.

I still think my life would be much better if you had stayed a little longer
A little longer to see me grow into this strong, caring and loving daughter
But am i really strong?
Should i consider myself strong when i fail to just let go of you?

A promise from me to you is that I'll never give up on my dreams
I'll fight even harder when it feels like I'm being defeated.
Mbali-Enhle Mar 2020
My mistake was loving you more than i loved myself.
My mistake was loving you more than you loved yourself.

Your mistake was taking my love for granted.
Thinking I'd be numb to all the heartbreak and humiliation till the time you decide to settle down.

My mistake was believing you everytime you told me "I'm sorry, it won't happen again".
Crying myself to sleep most nights thinking that's what it's took to love someone.

Your biggest mistake was wiping away my tears without thinking you'd be wiping your own tears one day.

My biggest mistake was falling inlove with someone i wanted you to become one day.
Mbali-Enhle Feb 2020
Love yourself enough to know
what's meant for you and what isn't.

Respect yourself enough to know
to never tolerate any form of disrespect.

Appreciate yourself enough to know
that you deserve to be happy.

Compliment yourself enough to know
that you're perfect.

Know, know, know
that there's nothing wrong with being a kind person.

People come and go in our lives.
Make sure they don't leave with a part of you.
He was imperfect
He was young
She loved him
She was crazy
She wasn’t so pretty
He loved her

He had doubts
He had challenges
She loved him
She was naïve
She was carefree
He loved her

He was smart
He was cute
She loved him
She got brains
She had talent
He loved her

He lied
He cheated
She loved him
He became rude
He was difficult
She loved him

He was scared
He was reckless
She cared
He was arrogant
He was insensitive
She was hurt

He ignored her
He hurt her more
She became different
He cheated more
He cheated carelessly
She ignored him

He became scarce
He cut off ties
She survived
He was addicted
He was pitiful
She had empathy

He fell
She brought him up
He got sick
She nursed him to health
She slipped
He didn’t catch her
He got into trouble
She turned her back on him

He wanted her back
She didn’t
It was too late
She felt nothing for him

She was,
A diamond he got
She was,
A diamond he lost
  Jan 2020 Mbali-Enhle
My heart feels like
it's about to shut down
from all the truths
that only I know

People view me
as kind
with empathy

Yet once they witness
my darker side
this inner demon
that is always
a few steps behind me

Once they see
the ashes and smeared blood
tainted within my mind and heart

I am once again alone
alone to pick up the pieces 
of a love that never was
Mbali-Enhle Jan 2020
I think
I am thinking
That i don't like to think
What others think of me
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