i do funny and i play stupid,
forgetting the pain that i safely hid.

untill the sun set,
and the moon and the stars meet.

only then that it come back,
all the pain and worries they strike.

oh no,
i won't let you see,
let all the burden be only on me.

oh no,
i won't tell,
let me bring it along with my last farewell.

just smile,
the way you always did,
let it be my last view.

just laugh,
the way you always did,
let it be my last music.

and when i say goodbye,
i wish to see you cry,
but I won't be the one to wipe your tears dry.

Dear ex,

Sometimes when the sky is blue
I would be reminded of you
all the 'I love yous'
and the 'i miss yous'
that we shared
as we stare into each other's eyes
with a smile danggling on our lips.

and when the rain pour
I'll be reminded of the day
when you showed up in front of my door
drenched by the rain
eyes mirroring the pain
and never did you hesitate
to part your lips and say
let's break up


Now,

what used to be us
has now become you and me
what used to be we
has now become you and him
what used to be a team
has now become nothing more than a dream
we are nothing more than strangers
stealing glances at each other

Have you ever wonder,
What would it be like to put a knife atop of your wrist,
Run it back and forth,
As it slice through your skin.

Then the blood oozes out,
Staining the once white floor,
Will you be hissing in pain,
Or will you be crying out in relief instead.

Have you ever wonder,
What what would it be like to have your body numb and cold,
As you lay on the cold hard floor,
Waiting for darkness to swallow you whole.

Then you set your eyes on the countless photos on the wall,
Recalling each and memory back,
As you let more air to leave your lung,
Before it then came down to your one last breath.

So you whisper your goodbye to the tightly shut door,
The deafening silence,
Before you forced out one last smile,
And let everything go.

I'm tired
Of walking with my gaze fixed on the ground,
Dragging my feet just anywhere around,
Trying hard to not stumble down.

I'm tired
Of flashing my smiles
And closing my eyes
Hiding whatever it is I'm feeling inside

Why oh why
You can see through everyone but me
When I'm as opened as a book can be
Or was it your choice to not to see ?

I know I've had my door closed,
But it was never locked
So why won't you at least knock?
Instead of passing by and ignore


If one day
I stopped asking "are you okay?"
Don't you dare to question me why
Because by then I'll laugh and say
You made me this way