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259 · Nov 2019
FlapJax
JaxSpade Nov 2019
Every day gets heavier
N it's hard to lift

All this weight is
Crushing me

N my strength has left

I wanted to lean on you
But no one was there

I just fell
       N fell

N I'm still here

Every day gets heavier
My legs can't carry it

I hit rock bottom
N now I'm under it

All this weight is crushing me
These pounds of energy
Sweating through the pores
Of my flesh fervently

I'm exahausted
N it's hard to want this

If this is all that there is

Every day gets heavier
How much longer could I carry her
Before she crushes my exterior
Into my interior

N here comes one more day
To add one more brick of weight

Into a collapse of my survivability
259 · Dec 2019
Helix Aspersa
JaxSpade Dec 2019
I love the way you

Do it


So..

       Slow


Mesmerizing


All the time you..

Harmonize me

With your

Soul


I love the way you

Do it


So..

       Slow


You paralyze me


And I

   Can't

       Move


But I don't need to


I love the way you

Do it..


Synchronizing

With my soul


I love you baby

The way take you it


So..

      Slow


So slow

The way you're moving

Across me

In the night

Through the morning


I love the way you

               Adore me


You're so tantalizing
They way you take it

So..

        Slow

You poetize me

I love the way you

                       Spoke

And grow inside me


They way you do it

        Is tranquilizing

You take me to another world


The way you do it

      I love you baby


The way you

Take it


So..

       Slow

                  
259 · Nov 2018
In The Blink
JaxSpade Nov 2018
When I close my eyes
I can fly
I can reach the stars
Find me on the moon
In my dreams
Of impossible
I can find what I loose
When I close my eyes
My mind opens the views
I could do anything I choose
I can fly
I can reach the stars
Find me on the moon
When you close yours
I'll be there with you
When I close my eyes
I'm in a different world
One that I imagine
Love rules
It's so peaceful
A dream for a fool
When I open my eyes
I see the truth
257 · May 2019
A Star Is Born
JaxSpade May 2019
Clumps of gases
Congregated in gravity
A nuclear fusion reaction
Began a stars activity

Shining
18 million degrees
Fahrenheit

Glows
A molecular cloud of nebulae


A Cepheid is born
Pulsating a RR Lyrae

As a candle
For the Lords eyes
Shining brightly

Hydrogen & helium
Beam a light within

For the purpose of a man
Who calculates constellations

To try and understand

                     Where he is
255 · Jul 2019
Rain
JaxSpade Jul 2019
Rain on my brain
In the sane plain
Of my framed pain
Pouring down on the pane
Of my window
Again
255 · Oct 2018
Tendencies
JaxSpade Oct 2018
I didn't want to die yet
Losing weight
Eating fate
Overfed my diet

Dining to stay alive
I kept paying the price
I paid to the highest

I didn't want to die yet
I did because the cost of life
Was a price I couldn't afford here
Losing weight and my conscious state
Death was sold down the street to a client
It's just business and there's not much difference
If nobody here wants to buy it

You could color or dye it
No matter how you paint
It ends in the same fire
The soul burns it's own lighted
I didn't want to die yet
But I did because my sins triumphed
The cost of life and the sum of love
Became defiant
I rolled the die yet
I landed on a snakes eye lid
Your only once in lifetime chance
Supplied your last dance
Under the moons high lit

When the right time to die is
My mental ills will be billed to desires
As they have fulfilled
The prophecies Will
God aspired

I don't want to die yet
But it is wriiten
Upon my heels
A number with so many steps
Will lead to the dies set
Forming a mold I was told
The only way it's pressed
Is with age old
Unless I take it
I'll try it
Because I have nothing left
To live for but quiet
Resting in peace
My savage beast
Is the only reason I die yet

I didn't want to
254 · Jul 2019
Night Mirror
JaxSpade Jul 2019
I've been talking in my sleep
Walking
Before I wake
Inbetween my sheets
I shake
Nightmares
Terrorize the peace
Of me I need

To dream
Is to speak
In a world obsolete
From being

I've been talking in my sleep
Tossing and turning
The other cheek
When I get beat
I bruise easily

Sleep walking
In my sleep
I began dreaming
In my dream
Waking up
Shaking sweat
Beads

Now now there
Close your eyes
The night in terror
Is awake
Yet your asleep
Walking around
Me
Staring at the ceiling

I'm only dreaming
About my
Dreams about my feet
Walking around
My sleep
I'm in a night mirror
Looking at me
251 · Nov 2019
Two As One (Katautas)
JaxSpade Nov 2019
Holding hands in love
We share in each others heart
Beating two as one
:::
We are each other
With each providing a heart
To produce one beat
::::
250 · Dec 2019
Dogged Dazed
JaxSpade Dec 2019
She knifed my heart
In just a few words
She said everything
I didn't want to hear

And she was happy

I casually took out the knife
   This had happened before
                And I knew what to do
When you're cut on the inside

Just mentally close your eyes
           So you wont see her lips
And mentally close your ears
           So you won't hear shidt

Smile and tell her you agree
And support everything she just said

About somebody else
You wanted to be

So bad
248 · Sep 2018
Black Candy
JaxSpade Sep 2018
Black magic
Cats
Walking around the halls

The cauldron steams
Pieces of chants
And whispered grants
Under gowns

No tricks
No treats

Just a witch
Influenced by what
She saw on t.v.

Purrs and scratches
On backs
Magic nails
Under pointed hats
Black

Walking around the halls
You smell the stirring of vats
Of pigtails and rats

And you see a black cat crossing
Where you entered its path

And you wondered
Where is the way back
To the magic
You had
Before evil attacked

Your bag

    Of candy
#evil #halloween #lust
243 · Sep 2018
Party On The Moon
JaxSpade Sep 2018
Party on the moon
In the sunlight strobe
The stars are dancing a trillion grooves

Pulsars and quasors

          Galactic dudes
        Supernova girls

On the blackhole dance floor

       Starlights and planet kites
Flying in the universe's height
               They're aint no fights
                                           Here
  Just bodies crushing
Rotating and blushing
                       Energies

All this magnetic
Gravitational static
    Arcing electricity

There's a party on the moon
     Why are you still on earth

Come join this galaxy
    In a loving allegory

Take the next rocket
To moons eye socket
The party had already started

                    And it never ends
                                      Always
240 · Aug 2019
I Didnt mean to beg
JaxSpade Aug 2019
I've got some spare change
Could you spare some change
Could you spare a change and give some

Coins in your pockets
Rattling around dripping
From your dollars droplets
Could you spare the sum

For somebody out there
Less fortunate

I've got some spare change
Could you spare some change
Could you spare a change and give some

I know you've worked hard
But could you spare something
For someone who wasn't as lucky
As you were

Just a few coins in your pocket
I swear I'm not a ***
I'm working, its just that
I don't make enough

I heard you say
You've got some spare change
Could you spare some change
Could you spare a change and give some
240 · Jun 2019
Decisions
JaxSpade Jun 2019
Some decisions are hard to make

Some may not understand
Why
They're made

Maybe one may cost a life
Or hurt your pride
In what's believed

Some decisions
Really just don't matter

Either road taken
Could end in the same
Placement
Or disaster

Some decisions are hard to make

Pulling the trigger
Or saving the whole mess

Some may not understand
Why they're made
239 · May 2019
The Swans Wardrobe
JaxSpade May 2019
There is nothing more constant than change
Everyday it reveals the work that is made

After all we've prayed
We put forth steps
In the directions of its pace

Slowly
Quickly

The metamorphosis of an ugly duckling
Forms the shape of a butterfly

A caterpillar with angels wings

Change is a constant way
Evolving different moods
On a path to never stay the same

As time video tapes change
And takes photos of yesterday
It slips away
Into the future

While she's in her dressing room
Fitted in a new gown
The swan floats the pond
In the most elegant way

Nothing is more constant than change
It is always there

And we could never make it stay the same
238 · May 2019
Es Muy Borracho
JaxSpade May 2019
Liquor

Her
licks tastes like ***

Tasty tongue

I don't need the bottle
When i can pour me her

Lick her love
Get me drunk
Liquor all night
Till the morn

I'm a drunkard
Wanting more

Grab me another bottle of her
Liquor

Until I've drank it all
Drunk on loves alcohol

Taste like ***
In her mouth
I don't need a bottle
When i can pour her out

Liquor
All afternoon
Lick her tongue
All I've consumed

I'm a drunkard
She's my *****
Stumbling around all day
She's the bottle i choose

Liquor tongue
Tastes like ***
Lick her
all night long
238 · Jun 2019
My dog will hump your leg
JaxSpade Jun 2019
The length of her legs
Were miles

She had the longest

Smiled
At me

She walked like a Jaguar
With a foxy physique
And It made me harder
Than masculinity

She slid
and slipped
                    By

dipped and sighed

Then left  her perfume
Right at my feet

The scent of this woman

Was a lion prowling
                       for roses

Pouncing on every motion
During the chase

In her mouth
The meat of her prey
Dripped oceans

Into the deepest abyss


I was left on the bottom

And the only way to get up
Was to climb the longest legs
Were miles

She had the longest
Smiled at me

The way she walked
Made me bark
And gave me a leash
238 · May 2019
A mans Anger
JaxSpade May 2019
The anger in man
Clenchs like a fist
Teeth grit
While flesh reds
The mind of a mans head
Pulses his heart rate
In a rage to seek and destroy
Another mans face
And pummel it to death
Cain you understand
Why we are Able
To ****** and then love again
The flesh of our skin
Flexing a masculine
Victory to win
Busting chops
With a hard fought
*** to kick
The danger of anger
Is the other man may have more than your strength could comprehend
A man could fight with himself
Aggravation and frustration
Completeing tedious tasks
His aggression is fuel for the fire
Of stressing over things that never matter too much
Are you mad bro
Don't you kno
You're only beating yourself
Up
JaxSpade Jul 2020
In God we Trust

The Way
The Truth
And the Life

The Red
The Blue
& The White

A Nation born under the light
Together we fight
Onward Christian soldiers
Unite

On the 4th day of July
236 · Dec 2018
Page 100
JaxSpade Dec 2018
What does the night sky hold
In its head
Above the stars hanging
On the walls of his breath
I saw one shine unto a light
Put forth before I step
Into the oddness of a every normal
Pile of ****

The sky of the night does what
Ever the moons says
Talking about the sun
And all the days he reflects

What tommorow brings
is the mystery you can't solve
Till it is

Every day you say you're going
To change
but the only thing that changes
Is what you meant

What you meant to say
Is that the changes that take place

Change
because they're different
Than the same thing that used to be before every thing changed it

The night sky changes what it holds in it hands
Comets and cosmic droplets
Of ultraviolet radiation

Somewhere in the human
Blood and oxygen
Consumes this universe
In a race for selfishness

Maybe one day
The night sky could change
The way it pays the day
Its darkness

And when we come to the end of the
Page
We could read one hundred
in the corner of the pages
Percent
But what we really need to change is the way we came to the end and Calculated
The fate of our death
235 · Sep 2018
Pinched
JaxSpade Sep 2018
when I saw you in my dream
I felt your love
But it disappeared
When I awoke

Everything you said
Close to me
Everything you did
Felt so real

I want to go back to sleep
But I wont
Because I know
You're not real

Ever could you be here
In this world

Dreams never come true
For me here

I'm a dead man
Walking in shoe
Dieing in the thoughts
Of his truth

When you entered
My dream
All I could think
Is how could
I have you

But as I awake
You faded away
From being my girl

I want to go back to sleep
But I wont
Because I know
It's not true

I could ever have a woman
That loves me too
234 · Jan 2019
Slow Ride
JaxSpade Jan 2019
Car ride

Cruising through the highlights
In a smooth afternoon

Slow stride
                      Your eyes

Gazing over the steering wheel

Lets go for a ride
Away from this town

We don't need to go fast
We can take our time

Car ride

My side
               Beside you

Cruising into sunsets
Kissing under moons

Slow stride
                     Your eyes

Gazing over the steering wheel

Lets go for a ride
Away from this town


Car ride

Cruising along the mountain side
Staring into nature's eyes

And her *****

We don't need to go fast
We can take our time

And cruise

Lets go for a ride
Away from this town
232 · May 2019
The struggle is real
JaxSpade May 2019
All those struggling eyes
There within belies
The pains that antagonize
Our lives left carbonized
Each morning dew

All our youth
Long in tooth
Wrinkle in the flesh
Of a crows foot

All those struggling cries
Tears of whys
Get crushed in fathers time
On mothers fertile eyes

As our lullabies
Intensify
Our songs
Memorialize
The love of lives
That improvise
All that's personified

In those struggling eyes
Lives the woah of a man
Synchronized
Within the days he has
Each morning due
230 · Jul 2019
Disco Superfly
JaxSpade Jul 2019
I see colors
At the disco
With so many others
Eyes kaleidoscopic
With mirror *****
Reflecting lights
And rainbow optics
I slip slide away
In a collage of music
And disarray
I see colors
With ebullient others
Popping champagne
I'm dousing and drowning
In a crowd of party
Wondering if it all is just a dream
I see colors
Capricious and smothered
In a cacophony of sounds fecund
With laughter in a feeling
Of floating in outer space
What was I drinking
What did I take
I'm dancing in propinquity with blue unicorns and pink elephants while my temerity flickers
In glow sticks and bottles of tanqueray
I see colors
And geometrical shapes
I should have been absteimous
But I couldn't resist
The munificent veracity
Of entertainment begging for my daze
Oh I see colors
At the disco
With so many others
Improvident and care free
I'm having so much fun
And I don't ever want to leave
Or awake
What was I drinking
What did I take
I can't feel my face
I was wondering if this was heaven
Or if these clouds were fake
All these women crowding me
Which one is my mate
I see colors
In another state
With so many others
Trying to erase
Reality and everything it takes
230 · Jul 2019
Casualties
JaxSpade Jul 2019
Some say life is war
Everyone wears a scar
Why must we crave more
Some say life is war
And what should we die for
Life is so bizarre
Some say life is war
Everyone wears a scar
228 · May 2019
She Loves To Waltz
JaxSpade May 2019
Her slicing razor blade
Dances on the need
To feel more pain

That first drip of blood
Smiles back at the reason it came

She's not worried about scars
The loss of blood
Or shame

She waltzes back and forth
On the course of pulse
Begging for a punctured vein

Left Foot Change.
Right Foot Change.
Box Step.
Forward Progressive.
Promenade.

On the edge of the thinnest blade
Blood flows as her slave
Her arms mimic a whipping post
With stripes of pain

To feel alive
To escape the numb
And revive again

She dances the waltz
Avoiding the faults
Cutting deeper
To avoid the emotional chains

Left Foot Change.
Right Foot Change.
Box Step.
Forward Progressive.
Promenade.

I found her on the dance floor
In a puddle of blood
Refusing my first aid

She said this dance
Is for her new romance
And that I should never
Cut in

And off she went
Slicing away
Her flesh ripped
Through the shreds of escape

Left Foot Change.
Right Foot Change.
Box Step.
Forward Progressive.
Promenade.
227 · Oct 2018
Hunger
JaxSpade Oct 2018
The pen seeks
         A new ink
As we jot
A new thought
         And think
What needs to be said
Caught in the web
Of our heads
   Spider spun sync

        The fly gets caught
And we prey a new plot
Devouring this meal
         And the reader
Gets wrapped up in our knot

The pen hungers
A new thought
A new ink
A new jot
So we feed it
To please it
Like a pet peeved
For another meal
And the readers get fat

As the audience gets big
Words fill the pig
And they joyously
Roll in the words slopped

The pen seeks
And it finds
What the readers won't let stop

Hunger
227 · Oct 2019
Happy Endings
JaxSpade Oct 2019
Happiness is a warm
Yes it is..

       Love

Take away all my pain
All of my troubles gone
                      To the winds

For the love of happiness

Is a warm
Yes it is..

No more crying
No more shame
Love is going to
Take it all away

And I won't need to pray
                  For a better day
I could just shine my light
                    Some other way

Happiness is a warm
Yes it is..

Affinity
               For
                     Infinity
     Love instead of a destiny
In the wicked world of men

The warm of
           Yes it is..
          Happiness

Taking away everything
               That feels so bad
               Erasing all the sad

      Warm gun mama

Love in my hands
       Take me away
From this wickedness

Take my soul
Save my head
From all this hatred
             Growing here

Happiness is a warm
Yes it is...




                       End.
226 · Apr 2019
Forgetful Me
JaxSpade Apr 2019
I saw that dress
             You wore
         On another girl
That loved me more

If maybe just for a minute
                           It lasted four

A different highway
                      Of curves

Without directions

                Same black dress
With different attractions

I calculated it all

Additions
                    Subtractions

The way she moves
   Versus your habits

            Same black dress
With ridiculous passion

Capricious
                       ******
       Advertisement

Mmm¡

           The way she walks
     That black dress talks
About how you're nothing

                 And me she wants

Every step of that mellifluous dress
Was melodic and harmonic
                   With the way I drift

     That dress you wore
On some other woman
              Some other lady

Obsequious to my roar

Gallavanting around town
                                On my arm

I saw that dress
             You wore
On another girl

And that's how I
Forgot your name
226 · Aug 2018
I only date church girls
JaxSpade Aug 2018
You're not my type
I only date church girls
I can sit by
          I like
They way they pray
The way they read
The way they trust in God

Like me

Every Sabbath
They're the habit
                  I want

Your not my type
'cause you don't like
The way I pray
The way I read
The way I trust in the God

You fight
223 · Dec 2018
Merry Happy
JaxSpade Dec 2018
Happy Christmas
Merry New Year
Cheers on the floor

I'm drunk on alcohol
And I've lost all memories
Of the previous year

Tear up the calendar
No need to remember
Who you were

Whiskey fireballs
Burning sensations
Welcome me
To dear January
Already here

I'm now a new man
Merry and happy
On the eve of hangover

But my eyes are too blurry and red
To remember the changeover
222 · Dec 2018
Afghanistanism
JaxSpade Dec 2018
Hide me
Where the moonlight won't find me

In the darkest of unnamed roads

I don't wish to be found
In a population bound

To the evil depths of their hell
221 · Jan 2019
Practice makes perfect
JaxSpade Jan 2019
She kissed the lips
Of a frog
That didn't turn into a prince

And she was convinced
With a kiss from her
Lovely lips he woud turn

Into something much different

But he didn't
He was just a frog
Green with warts
With a tongue long

He sat on the log
As she cried to her mom
He's never going to change at all

He said
I'm sorry
I am a prince in a frogs body
But the only spell that could release me
Is a kiss of true love

So you'll never be my princess
But thank you for the wet kiss

I loved the practice

Perhaps you have a sister
220 · Oct 2018
Wishing For A Prayer
JaxSpade Oct 2018
I fell into sleep
Unto a dreams spell

I found myself
On the bottom
Of a deep well

On the coins
Of wishers
I rolled on the wishes
And I heard one shout

I wish I could be
Someone else

And another one said
I wish I was rich somehow

I heard all the wishes
Some for death and some for clout

Each one upon a coin sang out loud

They all wanted something in their life
That wasn't allowed

The last wish was for world peace
I heard the voice say proud

But It just fell to the bottom
Of this waterless well

With no one to ever grant them
They just sat in piles

Wishing to be granted
What our God could have
219 · Sep 2018
Blind Melon
JaxSpade Sep 2018
Parts of me
                      Ill my pieces
                     Thoughts to be
Just like Jesus
       Impossibly
Be the good neighbor

When I don't like nobody

Finding peace
Is a solution
Searched in it's rarity

     It is a puzzle piece
Lost which completes
                  Parts of me
                    I once had
Till I developed leprosy

My skin dripped fingers
As my heart fell off of me

Hunting down the cure
Was exhausting
And melancholy

My dissed ease
   Was a necessary
          By all means
I lost
Parts of me
                    Involuntarily

As I looked to the floor
I noticed everything

The broken pieces
Scattered
Were swept into a pile of me

Now I'm putting back
The parts of me
That never functioned
Properly

However broken
I never lost hope
Until I could find every peace

To assemble
The parts of me
That were always there

But I was too blind
To see
219 · Jul 2019
GIA 4Cs cut
JaxSpade Jul 2019
Her diamond eyes cut the pane of my glass heart
216 · Apr 2019
Discarded Core
JaxSpade Apr 2019
I want to be that girl for you
She said she loved the way I write

I want to slip into something comforable

She said I could take it off

I want to be that girl
Eve
       In the garden

She said she could tempt me
And she could

We ate the love
And covered up

She said the sin
                               was
Worth it
215 · Sep 2019
The Beholder
JaxSpade Sep 2019
Beauty beholds an eye
That can see the heart inside
215 · Jul 2019
Zombie Cake
JaxSpade Jul 2019
Falling apart
The distance between
Remains so large
The memories forget
What they were made for

That faint love that faded
Into replacements
That never fulfill
And it's all too late
To recover what was killed

The corspe of yesterdays
Left in the past images
Rotting in the brain

I call the zombies of the world
To feed on what's left
And I offer my heart
To add to the buffet

Apart from falling
My thoughts are telling me
It's ok

Everything they consumed
You gave

If there is a loss
It is theirs to lose
In the belly of their grave

They ate that distance
Like a triple layer cake
And when they finish devouring
That sugar
Their teeth will decay

For what they put in their mouths
Was a sweet talk
And now they have nothing to say

Falling
Apart

Together was not
Anything left on their plate

For they ate
And the only thing left
Is to digest
The waste
213 · May 2019
casino
JaxSpade May 2019
I almost died last night


And I've lost the lottery too

It seems I can't ever win


The jackpot

  When I pull
213 · Apr 2019
A Word Is Alive
JaxSpade Apr 2019
A word is alive
It never dies
Some might say

That Its death
Lives in the breath
It takes
212 · Mar 2019
Brainfood
JaxSpade Mar 2019
Parietal, frontal,
Occipital, temporal,

I lobe your cortex cerebral
I'm the type of postcentral gyrus
That would love to be your primary somatosensory cortex
A cortical homunculus
Neurologicaly mapping the anatomical divisions of your body
I want to stimulate your sensory and motor
Then take over your proprioception
With love and affection
I felt an ****** in your basal ganglia
Amygdala! I couldn't believe it!
All I had to do was a lil trepanation to achieve it
I love your brain

Now I'm going to eat it
211 · Oct 2019
I was looking for you
JaxSpade Oct 2019
I was looking for this girl
Who wouldn't mind my love

And spending some time
Together

Where we could be us

I was looking
And searching
But I couldn't find ya'

Maybe i Passed you up

I don't know
I was looking for this girl
But she never showed

I keep looking
Maybe she's up the road

Waiting to spark a conversation

I was looking for this girl
Who had a smile
That pierced my heart
And wanted to know how
If we could be together
Till the end of forever
And never be apart

I was looking for this girl
But I never found

And that's just the way it is now

I'll have to stop looking
For someone
That won't ever be around

You see...

I was looking for this girl

                                         But I..

                                         Gave up
210 · Oct 2018
We Are The World
JaxSpade Oct 2018
So what is the wicked world
Confined behind the bars of fools

Consumed by the man and girl
And It keeps each spin of the atmospheres
In the lust and desires of who

Dreams of the end by wars
Or a climate changing her
Under her rainbows
Reminding each neighbor
The end will always draw near

So what is the wicked world
Dark in her prince
Witch does so much work

The fear of the mirror
Each man succumbs dearer
To himself
Instead of his God
210 · Oct 2018
Ladies Luck
JaxSpade Oct 2018
Clovers fall
Down

To the ground

Clubs
Over diamonds
Four leaf crowns

Have you a heart
What have you found

Green was all over
And lucky left town

All of the clovers fell
Onto the deck of cards

Upside down
Turning over
Hedron

The smell of vervain
And mixing sober
Ginger under a *****
Dug out

Clovers fall.                                                                                                                                                                                                  
down

A circadian rhythm
With the ground

Such a mysterious milieu
Nascent in the soils
                             Flinging about

Clubs thrown around
The dealer crowds the house

Clovers fell down
Into a theasarus
              Of sound

Have you a heart
What have you found

Green was all over
And lucky left town

Wood sorrel
Revelations
A tousle world
          Unbound

Make yourself a bed
In the clovers fallen down
JaxSpade Jul 2020
I lost the war
   All my fight

Was conquered

  I considered
To live where
Where my death
             Haunted

I was a ghost
       Spiraling
In a phantom host
Gliding into the center
                      Of a joke


I started the whole world laughing


But the joke was on my passion
I started a prayer
           And found
the joke was on me askin'

I lost the battle
My body was dragged thru the shrapnel

And I drowned in the fear
Of having to live where
                   It happened

The toll of my flesh
           Paid the ash
           The cost of my token

For the wages of sin is death
            I know I owe
But the Savior does the work
       While I rest in the hoping

Perhaps I lost
    But He won
    What he wanted

I just wish I could've lived
                      Yet I couldn't

I lost the war
       A soldier
        Fighting for the life
Of my dissipating vapor

I had to escape here

           From the pain
The selfishness
And never-ending hatred

I bid my farewell
    To the hellfire
  I was left
To burn in

For God so loved the world
     He sent a boy and a girl
To be harassed
       By demons

I started a joke

                  But the Devil
Delivered the punchline
207 · Sep 2019
dirty talk
JaxSpade Sep 2019
The devil whispers in my ear
Love and ever things I hear

Licking my lobes
And kissing my fear

The devil whispers
Would I dare

To listen
206 · Jun 2019
Burn out
JaxSpade Jun 2019
This side of the fire
There was a glow
Reflecting the flames
Red orange
It was her face
Befallen on a distant gaze
While the fire burned
She stared at it
And he  her
In-between the crackles
And embers dancing in the heat
This side of the fire
There was a fire
You didn't see
When the fire burned
Her lips looked parched
For a drink
She looked hotter than the fire
Could ever be
And he burned his heart
On the temperature
This side of the fire
Desire burned into the night
I heard a crash
A burn
And a dive...



Cloud of smoke
JaxSpade Jul 2019
The sheep counted me
As I tried to sleep

I fell awake
Because my thoughts
Kept trying to think

Pills didn't help
They just made me weak

For insomnia came
And stole my dreams

Like a thief in the night
But the night stole me

It put me in a chair
And it tied me there

But I wasn't asleep

I was having a nightmare
And my sleep went walking

Then my imagination started talking
About how I could escape

But it was too late

The sheep became faint
As the count became great

And I missed work
Because I couldn't awake
201 · May 2019
The Old Passed
JaxSpade May 2019
The old possessive past
Collections of everything
Owners have

Get the suitcase packed
Nothing ever lasts

Into the clouds of the next years path
Ain't gonna miss nobody
Never gonna think back

All my possessions got me
To no where

And they were never in my hands

They were never mine to pack
Where I'm going

The only thing I'll have

Is the past
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