I was the punch line as I entered the room
Stares and stifled giggles were merely clues
I played my part
The shy, quiet church girl
Overweight and ridden with low self esteem
He was curious to meet someone like me
He picked away at my parts
I opened to his words
I showed him parts of me no one has seen
Only to end up hurt

You have the deepest desire to let someone see the depths of your soul
Inside and out
Share your darkest secrets
Confess your temptations
Venture to new places
Yet, you’re alone

They ask why you’re single
A question asked many times
And every time you get the sensation to run and hide
It makes you terrible inside

Well don’t you want kids?
Of course you do
Now, you’re trying to play it cool
You don’t want this one to *****
You don’t mention your worries
Hiding all your regrets

And just when you start to get the a glimmer of hope
You’re swept under the rug
Left with empty words and wasted time

Loads in the corner
A chair full is unfolded
Wash day lies ahead

I look at you
You look at her
So I look away

Closed myself off from the situation
Directing myself on another course to take in
Piercing with negativity
“Of course it wouldn’t be me
Did he actually see me”

Blinded by her figure and beauty
While I try to ****** with my personality
Fail

Pride is bruised
And I’m feeling misused
As my energy is being abused
I’m in hell

Tried to smile to hide the pain
Am I overthinking?
Just being lame?

Continued heartbreak
The pain stays
As you look at her
And I begin to walk away

Burning in my chest
Don’t know what to make of it
Struggling with stress
Solitude
Where darkness surrounds
Thoughts abound
Tied down in anguish
It wasn’t supposed to be like this