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Honeybee Sep 2020
Her blood dripped down her arms
As she wrote letters
When said goodbye to the world
Yet I didn’t get to say goodbye to her
what a cruel world
Not even a clue how to deal with depression
She just had to cope on her own
She couldn’t tell anyone
As her body dropped to the floor



She’s now

Gone
I lost someone I loved dearly to suicide
I miss her
She was and still is my muse


It’s too difficult and meaningful to give a tittle sorry
Honeybee Sep 2020
?
I am here

But am I really?

I don’t think I am

But I say it anyways

Can I change?

I thought I could

But now I’m questioning

How?
Honeybee Sep 2020
When she cried
Instead of smiling

When she wore long sleeves
Instead of wearing a shirt

When she only acted kind to others
Instead of herself

When she didn’t say I love you
Instead she said nothing at all

When she had friends
Instead now she sits alone

When she had clear skin
Instead bears scars now

When she said goodbye
Instead of goodnight


You didn’t notice
Honeybee Sep 2020
You can see the pain
Leaves a blood stain
Have sat at a gray window
Cried into my pillow
A lot of nights
I think about the fights
That I caused
I wish I could have it paused
Could have fixed it
At least a little bit
Arguing every night
I was in my blanket pulled tight
Or in the tub begging to drown
All I had was a frown
"Keep your head up"
It wasn't just a bump
You did this
Back then there was no bliss
I was thinking of a day
Where things might go a little my way
But it never did
Honeybee Sep 2020
"Ugly"
Wounds ******
I don't believe in myself
Put your feelings on top of that
Bookshelf
Hide away
I have nothing to say
I'm alone in this world
Life in itself is a hurdle
I'm long gone
My family's love is overdone
Everyone's fake
They are just like snakes
Friendly then deadly
Comforting yet scary
I can't handle this
Throw me into the abyss
Already
Honeybee Sep 2020
Time after time
Rhyme after rhyme
I’m still crying inside
I ask myself why?
Why can’t I see
What they think they know about me
Or
For
What they knew about me
I hope this makes sense😣
Honeybee Sep 2020
She gives in
To the sins
Of death
Every breath
She takes
She might catch a break
But the gauze
Says she’s on pause
Going through life
With a knife
To her skin
Starving to be thin
Waiting for a day
She’ll find a way
To survive
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