I dip my pain and misery in glitter
to blind you by the colors of joy
but you’ve called my bluff
you looked close enough to see
washed out colors
'‘Why didn’t you tell me?’'
ashamed I look down
because I too
was blinded by all the glitter
so desperately I wanted to be who I’ve always been
so I held on to it
I kept it there for people to see
that I wasn’t
completely broken
''maybe I could even convince myself
that I was okay''
I said

My life has been about impressing people
when the only one I needed to impress
was myself

You took my lips hostage
so I couldn’t beg for mercy
can’t feel a thing
other than your hands
holding my face
grabbing my waist
sparks flying
going crazy
you got me
intoxicated

You know what hurts,
you’ve been through hell

you know what pains you,
you’ve been through stress

you know what breaks your heart,
you’ve been through grief

you know what darkness is,
you’ve been through depression
but,
you know what happiness should feel like,
that’s why you give it so freely