I pick up the skirt,
I pick up the sparkling beads
in black,
this thing that moved once
around flesh,
and I call God a liar,
I say anything that moved
like that
or knew
my name
could never die
in the common verity of dying,
and I pick
up her lovely
dress,
all her loveliness gone,
and I speak to all the gods,
Jewish gods, Christ-gods,
chips of blinking things,
idols, pills, bread,
fathoms, risks,
knowledgeable surrender,
rats in the gravy of 2 gone quite mad
without a chance,
hummingbird knowledge, hummingbird chance,
I lean upon this,
I lean on all of this
and I know:
her dress upon my arm:
but
they will not
give her back to me.

The stars and palms
hold all the secrets of the world

And I'll never let go
chasing the cat down the back ally
sun shines slumping
into
my baked brown skin
It smells like old summer rain

and laughter

One day it'll be gone
and I do not need
the stars
the palms
or Mrs.Sally's water well

to tell me

You are the fish in the sea
But
I am a bird.
And a pigeon at that.
Not even a gull.
But
The gull will probably gut you.
I mean eventually,
will.

I cut the middle fingernail of the middle
finger
right hand
real short
and I began rubbing along her ****
as she sat upright in bed
spreading lotion over her arms
face
and *******
after bathing.
then she lit a cigarette:
"don't let this put you off,"
an smoked and continued to rub
the lotion on.
I continued to rub the ****.
"You want an apple?" I asked.
"sure, she said, "you got one?"
but I got to her-
she began to twist
then she rolled on her side,
she was getting wet and open
like a flower in the rain.
then she rolled on her stomach
and her most beautiful ***
looked up at me
and I reached under and got the
**** again.
she reached around and got my
****, she rolled and twisted,
I mounted
my face falling into the mass
of red hair that overflowed
from her head
and my flattened **** entered
into the miracle.
later we joked about the lotion
and the cigarette and the apple.
then I went out and got some chicken
and shrimp and french fries and buns
and mashed potatoes and gravy and
cole slaw,and we ate.she told me
how good she felt and I told her
how good I felt and we
ate the chicken and the shrimp and the
french fries and the buns and the
mashed potatoes and the gravy and
the cole slaw too.

even if weeks go by
              years go by
              decades

even if life surpasses
         death surpasses
         life

even if i can no longer bear to look at you

you have me
          always

You're the flame
To my moth.
My burnt wings
Crumble
And still I come back;
A glutton for punishment.
Sing me your
Lullaby of lies,
That I may
Hide my shame
And pretend once more
That I will pretend
No more.