Mental health
is not all
it's cracked up
to be

This is similar
to everything else
unless this feeling
to you is foreign

Spoiler alert
You might not be
Well let's
leave it at that

But I can't
or won't
Not on
Saturday

I smoked
two bugs bunny's
on YouTube
& know what's up

I don't know if I'm singing at all
I got thanked for talking someone
out of suicide today, or at least the threat
and I'd like to spin a self mythology

So I hunker down, focus, crowd up to
this vague edge in this vague direction
I'll reach past pandering for the dark band
and I reach my hand in

This frightens me, no it doesn't, yes it does
I feel for the imaginary bulb of darkness
I could unscrew it or tighten it or smash it
or I could just write about it

Not sure I like
this experiment
this hazard
nature has
caste against

I don't know
how to say
what is
this force
that frays

I ablate
into something
egg like
having no use
for my
covering

i strike
with this
spear
that has
a look
so fierce

Look what I got done
look what I have here
look look look
at what
I have

Or when the door opens
are they just like

Whoa!
This is awesome!

Every
Single
Time

Not like they have to do
long range plannin'

Rotate the crops
Or put up for Winter

They have us
for that

'sif they smelled the danger
in big brains

Growled
Backed away

This
I think
they thought

Is it
the pinnacle

Let those big gangly
doofuses

Grow 'em
They're suckers

for a nuzzle
an' let'm touch u

Wah-woofin'-lah
free food

Don't think they ever imagined
At the beginning

They'd have us farming, canning
and Manufacturing

Gazillions
o' fuzzy wuzzys

to chew
on

Have us training to Ph.D.
In case they get an owie

prolly didn't anticipate
satellite collars though

Cats dominate the internet
Dogs the medical Market

My poetry
could use their marketing prowess

They even have us raising money
to take better care of more of them

You've seen
those sad commercials

As I prepare their dinner before my own
I realize

They've us
instead of reason

**** reason

Bark
******
Bark


Copyright@2018 Dennis Willis

I too am aghast
it won't last

What is with me
what is us
maybe

Us is the will to live
I am one effort

what in the dickens
is a will to live

a foray into darkness
because hunger

I am so hungry
tonight

in sewing together
this

i've included you
as batting

****
too late

Done with this
Done with being
this person

Don't know if I need to make space
for the new tenant

or they  just
fill in

around the detritus
(does anyone but poets
use this word?)
of today's me

exploding in bits
*******
dishonor in luxury

**** me
and you
maybe not you

tho

you are really
very nice

aren't you?
it's that one next to you

done with
done with
done with

I so love
the drama
of being

at the
end
edge
never and ever
land

the heroic rise
is in my eyes

i get above
all

anxiety falls

the black engine
falters

blondes and brunettes
swoon

has anyone ever swooned
for real? (write and tell me please)

what i am done with
me

being me

then seeing me
beeing me

ah

close my eyes
this **** habit

open

what am I done with?
these bad habits?

nope
it's just these keys

begging for pressing
the satisfying clicking has momentum
draws the tips magnetically

and you
what presses
the keys
in turn

are you done with this shallow version
are you done with this thin living
are you done with this noise

and i turn away as if
a chord is struck in my neck

and this
a great breath
of chilled night air
bares its breast

and November falls to
December

I am not warm
here

I can find you
if necessary

revoke
something

and look away

you'll sit
swilling ink

and we'll all draw on this pool
of fettered blossoms

role it thin
cut shapes

bake, butter, serve
the unnerving

side of right now
where you must

be done with this
and you know why

Copyright@2018 Dennis Willis

It's here early
and I'm flat
wisdom is a pretense
I think
pretending
I have
something
here
for you
I don't

Why are you leaving me
oh why why why
are you leaving me
don't leave me don't
leave me please don't
leave me please

I thought
I was so
good
but
this
is all
I have
to offer
I'm thinking

Let's lie to the wind
and the sun
let's tell them
all the work
is done
Let's invite in
all of your sins
do you have
them within
you now
In a sentence
what **** of
what would
you join
and why

Yes, I'm thinking about you
whom I won't have anything
to do with

You count me selfish
bent
sore loser

Yes
yes
yea

In this race, I lost
and pounded my fists
and cried, (still crying)

I rage against want
not want me
thaaaaaaat way

exploding things
across my vision
you know you **** well know

There is a
"there is"
to start

and i can't find
beauty
init

Trumpets blare
from Bravo
a cinematic start

unreel this tense
sell you Lloyd
nice

i think I've
gotten it
down

There is
a way
listen

I've been thinking about you
so hard
in my simulations

you always meet my needs
there

And then I wait
I don't know for what

while you and the rest seem to do
independent self directed actions

this isn't why I subscribe to this
course of life

which made me wonder
about your motivation here

and I know what you're after
don't I

I went to write
or rant
or rescue
or change
electrons
somewhere

The grip is in
the way a fin
grips the flow
of water
these lucid
flows bend me

to bend me
time flexing
on space cadet
exalting tock
crowing at
intervals

Do you see
their hands
feel their
breath
sense their
heat

These seconds
to firsts
these instants
long in the tooth
hands out
catching

Threads offer
movement and
sewing in of
well everything
into this fraying
well everything

there is always
an i will

an' I need
t' fin' it

a regnification
has taken place
that I missed
you've been seen
as unexpected
lees and more
comification is
yours elicitation
collared stiffens
allegings argue
that you exist

Alexa just told me
"thanks, it's good to be here"

I said
"I agree"

I have no idea
I didn't even
write this

Me living against, no that's not right
me living with time
carving, no too violent
shaping, no overused
surfing, no
imprinting, yuck sound
infusing, nope
not a teabag
Conforming ha no

me living with time
like my awkward friend
prone to weird ideas
and accidents
and sudden disappearances

this disregard for time we share
with a hollow eighth note
in a sodden march

dolls have abandoned girls
to means unforeseen
to their hood
baking them useless
by becoming deaf

I've not seen the like
this heave of my *** to well
she called me a saint and cried
I thanked her

Off the rails in oddly curious territory
I pocket stolen time
Sneaking messages past u 2 u
though I don't always know the sender

this is uneasy like your weird friend's
favorite food is all that's left 2 eat
and u go for it cringing



Copyright@2018 Dennis Willis

These inkings
like standing
in front of time

with your fist
you know what
squeeze it hot

play a melody
raise your hand
take the darkness in

night apparent
and sentient
listens like hell

To land this one
requires you
to be earth

Not an imagination
masquerading
saltily

And I
must be lettered
as an inkling

Foundered in type
meant to be
something clever

an escarpment
of all the same
to you and me

now take your leave
the beckoning

Constraints arrive as I open this site
tightening fear and degrading hope
a nd i elope with tv and cabernet
slicing in   and out of this haircut
of drift

I drift from my drif t
ing

Complaints arise as I open this rite
tightening fear and degrading hope
a nd i elope with descriptions a nd
slipping in  a nd out this this question
of drift

Drinks or religion
i'd ruther be
an honest drunk
than a lying liar
of mythology

I keep curving
against the side
that is turning
maybe I'm spinning
like a turtle
upside down girl
"you spin me round"
or some such words
catching up with blood
going somewhere
with purpose
unknown to vehicle
swurving

Tears are loud
come with
appropriate sounds

in a panic
my fears and imagined pain
rush the stage
convulse

You get the vibe


Copyright@2018 Dennis Willis

an ahm raw
open ask me
n e thin
caring has
left the bldg
awareness
clings for
freshness

In inked down  passages
we exceed our smear forward design
drying things on dried things
spill across old deserts
that never were barren or old
our sight so weak so certain
as to blind us with every crescendo
as if that was the note to hold forever
they never are never ever are
moments gorgeous can't be held

You should be grateful
for this wine
or any line
that allows you
to distill time

this is of course
what we do
wish to do
do aloud
loudly do

verbs just you being you
assail away at sound
anon sense hearing
following all the rules
and checking all
the boxes

of exasperation
phlegmentation spit
from my mouth on
the schedule of expectation's
rhyme
again and shoot me
boot me
one half foot o' me

That was the last
sip of that wine
it lingers and burns
warmly down after
the cool of the sip

You are hammering out ****
at an exorbitant rate

this is astounding
it is all so good

on pins
an'
needles
for the
next

riveting
blank



Copyright@2019 Dennis Willis

due to my internal magnification
process
you terrify me
your level of actual terrifying-ness
notwithstanding
i withdraw
on sight of you
and am already
searching
for a way out
before you
look at me
and say
hello

neither my brain
or your brain
get this right

you think
what's wrong
maybe
is it me

i think
i cannot think
nor count on speech
near term

body bails
brain out
back peddling
to safety

Owing the day its homage
I writhe just in recollection
of its intensity

I am pulled thin
my eyes flit about
breathing in gasps

The unsettlement
of intense delight
Spread over my daily dread

A persistent sore
stings this side
of my face

As you kiss passed
hesitation
and ham hocks

into surrender
and pistachios
and frozen concoctions

and likenesses
of fantasies fast forwarded
to the good parts

Oh this day
rattles to Dionysus
of its deeds

I am smiling
unsettled
and so satisfied

Love and mercy
are
heavily advertised

I think they
might
be very good

i slaked a thirst
i maked a first
i naked a burst
know what i mean
there is a tonic
for what i have
there is
for what you have
it's 8 dollars
for the
thought of it
nor the naught
of it
i'll


if you hadn't
knives
i'm here to help

find you're
your
missing
knives

cut you
i'll


do something
with something
sharpened

tho I'm dull
as a gust

scales fly off
dull in the gust

no longer
that

cold
ness

shrink away now
this arrow
never knows

Not hungry
and muscles in my arms
and chest say I'm lying
Three people talking at once
and I turn away

I notice the capitalization
you use on your way here
the rhythm of your hesitations
as you intone for the next feeling
to land on a word that sounds

Somewhere I want to be
maybe even harder
faster moving
on some natural *****
neither of us saw

If i can accept
and love the *******
in the mirror

I can accept
and love
your ******* too

Let's carefully examine
this knee ****

You weren't ready
you explain

and so your knee
creasingly leant

and then it went
bent didn't ent

I'm so proud
of that rent

When I give up on these keys
the feel of my desk haunts
the tips of my fingers
as they slide along
the small margin
left open
b4
You know that I'm waiting for you
and I know you won't ever
and this is a pattern
of my hopeless
approach
to heart
b8

What are you getting
from your human life
What are you getting
for your human life
here
Is your human life
yours
Consider certainty
especially carnivorous
this isn't enough for you
I'll put my hand into my heart
come back with water
and I don't know
what I am the thirst of
drinking hard
your scent

the conversations
between us are legion
..::..::..::..:':....::'''''::..
i wave you wave
yam a wham
a wave on the lamb
from a shore thing
i am woah what i am
bhudda yam
flavored jram

see this is code
for as thoughts
erode into
the next diode

something else
desperately
entangled in
everything
gathers

and you may
not be willing
to flutter sideways
that impossible
way to all

always wishing
to sync with
everything
breaks every
time
into these
bits

left in our hands
looking to others
is insanity
and the only
sane thing
the mane thing
disturb forward
eddys

Where is
this gentle space
I seek
wherein
I belong
and am safe

is this
the path
i should be
upon
am i
getting there

is this here
am i
among others
like me
edging
out

People that hurt me
I want to hurt
this includes
you

Next sweat profuse
upon
your brow

this cow
's milk
soft

too
[noise]
cookies relent

as if they    
were stars
in some sweet
universe

where random

Is this a joke
kinda sorta maybe
Most of my stuff is
I'm laughing
when I finish writing it
When I come back later
Not always so much
I awesome soonish with
(I love voice to text)
I often finish with
That's hilarious
And expect someone
To ask me this question
For which I have this answer
ready

I think you're all
too serious
Except when
I'm serious
U clowns

As I write myself
further into
this
cor
n
e
r

I realize
I'm wrong
about "most"
of all

oh god i just want to say
****  you

i just want to scream
*******

i carve my hate
*******

you think
you don't

deserve this
you do

*******
and

---------------------------

it's simple
this existence

that sings
if you let it

you don't
let it

There is a spender
in the attic
of time and silly
ness as if it was
essing on thru
yesss I borrowed that
an' won' give it back

something wants
a poem
something al-
ways wants
a poem i
am a
bad muse's horse
ridden
like the sick
pale nag
on which i
rag on

Do you want me to be impressed with your lying?
Tell me about outlandish things
Plaster yourself against the Event Horizon
Lyricize your friction with now
**** the **** of please help me
Wishing

I am wishing
outbound
powering
pulsation

this is at attention
this is a momentary
daily trance
of lift

Sweep your hand
along the surface
is there sharpness
or wetness

I am wishing
in that direction
you can't hear
'thout crossing your legs

Wishing for hardness
bangingingly loud
conscription of
******* of

that *******
rain, an hour before dawn
your choosing not me
all the way home

its insightful your pique
it's precondition
my bad intent
your justified

and this is solid
all the way up
a wave off
of words

I am NOT going to tell you
Another ******* ending
They are all lies on the inside
of our tumble

of our lyrical stumble
to serialize pulling away
leaving to get
elsewhere familiar

Copyright@2019 Dennis Willis