I reject all
of your opinions
and ask you
to supplant them
with mine
forthwith

The exigencies of solace
touch can be a        
starvation

skin can be a
master

this rigid muscle
in my back
needs talked down

i am fallen
and rolling
down

out of need
to just see
up

How I like my women
crabby and unavailable
apparently

On the heap of fools you go
I am so
u chose away chose away
almost every time
came back for a dime
almost every time

So evocative to be beautiful and distressed
I'm helping without knowing why
secretly knowing a why
why why  why
do i get myself into these things
duh

i not I lyingly volunteer at all opportunities
does that sound good do I sound good
here is my song back there is my hiding truth
full-on terrified high high high
do i get some more of this
huh

Wondering you and i and I aye-aye so many
of us in here in this expansion of wuh & huh
wuhing and huhing through lines and minutes
confused in self lie lie lie
i believe oh i believe
yuh

I've dropped erasers
that had your head
body and lips to uh t
nope not undoing me

I tread here ever so lightly
while blood throbs in my head
I arch up a vibe and keyboard

Waving my hands over words
brushing the waves of fib'ry air
sore of meaning an' solitude
an' the drinkin' gitn us here

You must wonder so perched
open to opening to burr verse
tipping up jars that pour out
known tasting things gahhhr

flimsy claim here of edge
that molecule sticks up eh
trippin' i freeze to quiet
just see what you want

These grist groun't
pepper grinder days
falling in bits
onto

Night's tapering off
and see-thru
clear tongue of space
dragging

crumbs and bits of me
away into the early morn
sometimes before dawn
breaking

I need help tonight
it isn't right
this alone

There's no one to hold me
this death of night
no arms 'gainst this cold
and i scream for my brother

it sounds like sobbing
it feels like scrabling  for air

resenting these words
another dissolving life
no one to hold it up
anymore

i am forlorn
thanks for wine
and nothing else

Another death
my  brother
this time

I don't know
how I can

What glove do I take off
this one, that one
the hands are choosing
fingers pulling
feelings ruling
i cannot fit you
i can't pull you off
three finger grip

It's poetry time but there is no song in me
there are commercials for songs I should feel
"I wish to be shocking like an eel" is my sponsor
"I wish to be rounding like a wheel" is in my corner
I'm doing personal development 'cause my market
hasn't formed yet but is nascent if not a coming attraction

will you buy now?  Will you ascribe?

narratives duke it out on a would-be
storied night when you are playing
to discern the light and right

I'll take my darkness and scotch
I'll take my turning in parts as conscience
I'll take my celebratory remarks at awakening
I'll take my leave of understanding this surface

And even kerning so far seems wrong
even the trueness is another trueness
unfelt at the corner bar and grill

where my heart is a paper napkin
at the corners of that smile dab dab

is there a lower form of life
i can live
i wonder
of course
i have first-world angst
crying in my warm bed

over women so beautiful
as to not
notice any
anyone
safely and never be alone
an' needn't be alone with me

Barely holding to consciousness
water dribbling down my chin
got to get this line roughed in

I can be this body in this chair
I can I can
I can feel this weight of myself
I am I yam
Lighten into whimsical lyric
"Green eggs and ham"

I lean and drift and sway
reaching for play
so clenched away

All else is harm and noodles
maybe rice no roni
with too much salt

remembering singing
i can't get up there
song

Sung in this chair
finding thru weeds now
wet old things that sing

Am I doing stuff you'll love
how could i

This voice is looser
than something
I spoke with afore

This neck is canted
toward like dousing
for alliteration

Reaching inside and out
the flesh as if they wave
themselves as one lick

Of one day really a moment
like a cathedral at sunrise
the moment the glass

I want to celebrate
an enormous
personal achievement

except its in a space
viewed differently
as if in & out of water

bifu rcation reigns
or its attempts
scramble to clumps & sides

the protease of exaltation
of two count 'em two
denouements penetrated

every author writing writes
such endings enchanted
with weak light indeterminate

I am alone here
I don't need to resist
anyone
I don't need to f e a r
any reprisal

and i am in fear
and what word
describes the muscles
in my arms
feeling reluctant

clenching has a source
carpals constricting
from this poor effort

A point of load
looking around
or is that after

weigh down now
a viewpoint clanchs
and I see you orzit

really really ewe
a well deserved
encampment

of self-declared
versions of you
vying for now

again where current
is pulled hard
from some tumbler

carrying carrying
carrion reimagined
as crow

this is an all-skate
the ***** kicks up
owning life

No way to get away from music
as you are music playing
though not necessarily well

the string of your moments
the sound of the deep dark background
quavering at different scales

stars even inevitably changed
by the sound of you being
an instrument sounding

you change like a pendulum
as it reverses its mind again
zinging toward right in now

on the very same canvas
properly stretched entanglement
is amused and hides my smile

I gave that up
that piece

Given up
and watched

Surrendered
knowing

I might be
wrong

I might be
strong

So, you require I go all the way down
to the question to the half-hearted angst
feel this surface with your fingers against

Slippery a universal quality we all slide
you know you want to slide into place ahh
be this connection insulated by another's

the saying of want seers inside mostly unsaid
paroxysms of nobody told me my body liked that
instead, they told me lies and asked for money

to buy more wet sand and porous webbing
they use to hold together explanations
made up by villagers ignorant of math and self

i descend rapidly from glossy realms of exaltation
zippered into tight-fitting and heavy breathing aints
to salve and 'suade selves that thought should stop

Dropsen nyan zegasef ul
is in rising

into subsequence
maybe consequence

Hence up blends
this is hesitance

nyan  takes up residence
all a sizing

"I got so **** depressed"
a single person
too busy

There is t his space
and i don't understand why
and across it is everyth ing i want
\
between narrow *** nows up at it
an' cowed collared up laters bailin' out
i am always dissonant *** awkward
\
unsound gets an involuntary look away
from here a bandon this space
i'm looking away looking away again
\
space making person for rent or lease
gaps aplenty await you and yours
go ahead talk first

We don't have time
since
it has us

These waves these
cosmic background
waves

Churn up everything
eventually
you

Opining here are
frothy bubbles
yeah

All the games are done
for the night
and I will lay my head
down to rest

I can't be here
can't be seen here
somebody might
see me here nope

staring at my shoes
these need an update
is the blocking thought
as you here circle

are is inoperative
has been for sometime
i imagine u understand
in this light pocket

yet you scramble
and monkey about
relentless in claim
must you be so shrill

i know this isn't now
i know this isn't here
i know there is a when

I opened the white box
and now must fill it
so I sneeze and say goodnight

there is just this one
i am missing now
long brown-reddish hair
down her back as she looks
at me over her shoulder
like a sun that likes me

yes i'm too lazy to digress
and shape and gape
as if properly prepared
i'm just the grunt
off the sawn edge of time
burbling along *****-nilly
crashing entrance halls
of expectation and hope
with sown confusion
i don't understand
yet enjoy

The thing about these tears
is that i need them to hear
in this isolation and quiet
the coughing of a small vent
swaying in the air pressure
in my air handling system
keeps me company along
with the noise of these keys
that leap off the screen to me
like weights and measures

do i hold up here against
do i hold up here welcome
do i hold up here

look i think at whatever
be in whatever for now

panics to your stability
high browed looks looking

and deep breaths settle out
and sort out a turning aside

here we've tuned into it
a curve unlike any other

costing you structured thought
systemic imaginings flounder

and the thing about these tears
is the edge upon  
which they are spilled

is a wound

When you slide your hand
over their skin softly
in disbelief

Dear Verse
I have to thank you for today
especially for today

no need to go into detail
or name names
there are names

and you know now
without naming
the feelings I am

This begins differently
I've just left a space
to see what fills in

I am taken
out of context
by this thin
string of characters
pulled from solution
thready breathing
seething
clenched teeth
just let go
let me slip
back
down
there
ah

Who are you swine who do not love?
Oh! You're me
Or someother thing with standards
bereft of humanity
where is that container
of my litany sunken
to bubbling snot
plaintively
will you
hear
me

I circle the j key with my fingertip
Push 'til you see
or raceagainst pressing matters
marked against
that which you mark
against being you
slipping 'n' high
emanating
all your
deaf
ness

**** the acknowledgment
of pre-created
grooves

They were madmen
early advertisers
hawking

Look-it looky here
looky looky lue
look you

Be drownt out
in your own life
by mine

Thas a complete
fools game
in rain

I either create a groove
or i don't
right?

A wave had a wave and made history
being exactly as tall as you
rushing as the moment's crest
awash with eddies and currents
frequent opinions stirring them-
Selves are riffs for reaching
or broadening so we remain
a separate peak on the hidden sea

Someday, I imagine, I will be
discovered
beneath rubble or in
magma

Someday, I imagine, I will be
discovered
skin suddenly in light, eyes tortured
and hungry

and there is this conciliation
of noxiousness

occurrent with definition
can you feel accurate

I approximately am not
being truthful nearby

whilst you time out as open
to this lid on danger being in place

were this an actual explosion
our bits would be scattered

I ticked through a second
and another one appeared
where do these lead

Here you are they said
quietly as if
I should have known

How these separate
those left behind from
now

On I will know
to take these slow
the few

When I was not a person
I could not treat you like one
I could not understand the-the looks
you gave me
When I was not a person
I was a crunchy thing
good and broken spilt in time
unapproved and no way in
contesting for particles of, whilst
lifting myself out of self-hood
I raged
When I was not a person
I did things
I couldn't do as a person
that piled up around me
and couldn't be surmounted
encasing possibility
plastic wrapping the settee
When I was not a person
I was a much greater thing
then all of you could ever hope
to be though blind and hopeless
and crying look at me
When I was not a person
I couldn't let you see me
like this

***** in a water bottle with iced tea
and her black tank top were accidentally
left behind

She and her friend had to come back
I inhaled deeply and still have that scent
on my skin

Rub it in rub it in oh the delight i am in

I have discovered so much that we have
royally is an understatement in the degree of
how ******* up

******* inserted by others between us and our
nerves and skin and ridges and edges and
delight is not light

So this is being depressed?
This bellyache or maybe
it's between belly and lungs
it's shortness of breath and breadth
i'm missing stuff mostly everything
and a constant nap wanting to happen
lowers the blinds on this  <blank
drawing a blank>
constant turning away to
turning away

Can I get taller standing on lines of poetry
Can I get longer laying my mystification down
Can I use something other than darkness as a light
Can I figure out sound
that sounded like uncertain knew its way home
an i donut away from the things of disorder asking