Now I have too much silence
too much peace
not enough pace
I think it is foolish to want a little trouble
but right now I'm floating on motionless water
with no storm cloud in sight
and I hate the stillness of it all

I envy how the rain can just wash away what it pleases

All I ever wanted was stability
somewhere I could be safe
not afraid
but the universe has chewed up every bit of familiarity I held like a heartbeat
and made it flatline

Sometimes we regret that we let people flicker in and out of our lives
like a broken light bulb
we think that its our fault because we didn't hold onto them with our whole souls
and now empty rooms seem to echo even louder now that they are gone

but now the light bulb has finally died
and we sit quietly in the dark
we've realised that light bulb wasn't worth replacing ever
because they chose to leave you in the dark

It’s a little colder now
A little harder to breathe
Harder to get the words out
I’m a little choked up
so please don't ask me if I'm ok
I just might breakdown

If there was a way self love could be bought
I would have invested everything I had into it