today I am free
to love without fear,
without hatred in my heart

today I am free,
resentments no longer bleed
into all my thoughts and actions

today I am free
to give and receive love
without expectations

Because deep in my center
I experience a loving God that
loves me today and everyday

Hope is a broken music stand
And the green three ring binder
That's contents now lay on the ground.
Hope is his beautiful musician's hands
That helped my scoop up
Leigions of sheet music
From the carpeted floor.
Hope is those beautiful brown eyes
That beheld me
While we tried to repair
The mess of papers.
Hope is my bravery
For sitting next to
Him:
The one person who helped me
When my broken music stand
Released it's contents.
Hope is...

(?)

I am in limbo.
I have this feeling in my bones
that my time will soon end
impending doom
that this happiness is not infinite.
But i relish right now
in the feeling that i am still hearer
he is still here
and the moments are precious while they last
and they become relics when they are over
which is why I need to remember
more than ever
the way it felt
the words that escaped this mouth.
the way the lake glistened
the sound of birds
and sweltering heat
sitting on a picnic table on a small island.
How finite it seemed at the time.
rejection
but with the usual overthinking
i found
hope
in that sense of
"it's not you it's me"
that he proposed.
He finally noticed his shadow
and told her the truth
that she already knew.
that I already knew≥
He is too selfish
too independent.
yet still she feeds the fire
of his ego
and holds on to the hope
that the credits won't transfer
when he comes back
he will be stuck in the web
with she
with
her
with I
withme.
and this is my salvation
this is my hope.
because no matter how dangerous and painful love may be
you can only run for so long.

Spring grapes die on withered vine
Wine of wrath flows bitter red
Isis' son seeks Babylon
Avenge by death the deed of Set

Along Euphrates course they fled
From march of madmen to the throne
And wine of wrath flows bitter red
Eagles flock to hawk by drone

Hung within a garden high
Black masks the march of death
Give new life to Levant's lie
And wine of wrath flows bitter red.

r~ 6/17/14

He kissed her tenderly.
The sweet taste of her lips
And the catch of her breath
Enthraled  him.
When he pulled himself back to admire her beauty
He was met with a sorrowful glance
And whispered
Goodbyes.

I had a father,
he was a kind man.
I'm not the kind of man
he was.

I try hard,
sometimes I fail.
I still look for him
in the mirror.

He fought two wars;
didn't make him strong.
He did that on his own;
he fought his own wars.

Looking back
now that he's gone,
I have to stop and wonder
what was in the water.

My old man
was the kind of man
that someday I hope to see
in the mirror.

r ~ 6/14/14

Gonna move to Qatar
ride in a gold Beemer
playin' songs for the Emir
on a ruby studded guitar.

Live in a silver highrise
go skiing in the desert
eat caviar for desert
singin' about the disenfranchised
and ruby studded guitars.

I'll be an expat in Doha
drinkin' with the monarchy
speakin' absolute malarkey
playin' tunes for all my brohas
on my ruby studded guitar
in Qatar.

r ~ 6/14/14

distant flame on the road
an imitation of home
elegantly seeking to be known
droplets of rain pour out into the depths of my soul
to awaken the eternal realization
that had never meant more in words
finally
"I love you"
an honest confession of admiration