I wait for it to go away, magically.

...I wait
             ......I wait
                          ..........I wait

I pretende these little thoughts aren't here
If I ignore enough it's gonna disappear
...Magically...
But it never does.

- where's tinker bell when I need her?

I read things today
That I feel but wouldn't know how to say
I read words way back wrote
From long time dead folks
I think
Of how much I wish I knew you
How can I miss
Someone who lived decades before me?

Neutrality
It's never a choice
There's no middle spot
It's always a two sides sword

Yesterday
I thought I wanted to die
Today
I'm sure

-Such a obvious way to go

Go on, go on
Use your difficult words
No, no
What a absurd!
Nah, of course I don't mind!
Go ahead
Steal what is mine
Don't bother
Take away what I've done
Pretend is yours,
Go on and tell everyone
Do you feel amazing?
Does it feels good?
Being credit for someone's else work
And saying it was you?

Left
Right
It doesn't stop
It dances around
So many thoughts
So **** loud
I really meant
To be okay by now
Now sleep, sleep
Come here, come here
But you never do
And it's nothing new
I'm still awake
So tired as I could sleep forever
My thoughts are running faster
I'm tired
I'm done
I'm exhausted
I try
I go
Where?
Sadness and hope
What a dammed midnight
Time
Flows
My mind
Drowns
I
Cry
Alone
All the night

- I dont remember the last time I actually slept.

I take a long bath
I convince myself the feeling won't last
I wait for the water to heal
My eyes get red, they know the drill
I wash my cheeks
It's been weeks
I drown my head
Thought I could bear
I let it down my back
Next hours I'll be numb on bed
I try to wash it away
But I dont think I can

-will I forever feel this *****?