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Callamasttia Nov 29
I'm suffocating in myself,
drowning, drowning,
inside the person I am.

No one to talk to,
So I made myself my best friend.
After a few moons together,
I realized I didn't want my company either.
And that's when I knew
I was completely alone.

I keep trying to shut myself down,
But I've been so loud this week,
I keep suffocating in me.
Callamasttia Nov 26
People that only
love poetry
when it's short
don't know what
poetry is
Callamasttia Nov 26
You ran dry my words
I've put down the pen
Cause I had someone
To talk
And listen
To all the words glimmering and blistering
But you never heard
I caught you asking the same question over and over again
I caught you asking the same question over and over again
I caught you asking the same question over and over again
Like a tired sentence
That you read and reread when you're half asleep
I gave you all my words
I gave you my poet soul
But you never read it
You never wanted to know the scent of my ink
You just wanted I gave you all of me
To take care of your own disorganized and scribbles words
You wanted me,
The part that took care of your words
But never wanted me,
The part that longed to be heard
Callamasttia Nov 26
You've rooted my brain
To the point where I didn't know myself anymore
You've poisoned my heart
To the point I didn't love me anymore
How did I give myself
To such a broken soul?
How did I give myself
While you didn't give yourself even once

I have loved for both of us
And it's ironic because
That was the farthest thing from love

And it was ironic because
You claim to love me so much
But you just rot me
To the point I don't know love anymore
Callamasttia Nov 24
Not all men,
Don't paint them with the same brush.
There are good fellas out there,
They're just hidden in the hush.

Not all men,
Don't be harsh and snap.
You're hurting their feelings,
By saying that.

Not all men
Just all your male classmates,
With different ages, incomes and background.
You think they're all the same cloth, but they're just clout
Real men are out there; you just have to be alert to find out

Not all men
Well, maybe your work colleagues
But just because they get carried in their jokes
Doesn't mean the nice guys have to pay for it

Not all men
Just your brother, cousins and uncles
Are the perfect stereotype of what they claim not to be
Maybe you just have to open your heart and see what they want you to see

Not all men
Remember that nice guy you met?
He was so charming and polite
So what that with his group friends he's the first to make a  offensive little Joke and get everybody to crack ?

Not all men
What about you lovely lover?
He doesn't want to be with you when it gets too hard
But he's so nice, isn't he? You should be more grateful for the lad!

Not all men
Didn't you have a dad?
He screamed and horrorofied you
Just thinking about your own good so
Why do you treat him so bad?

Not all men
Your classmate is so smart!
He can talk about books and life
Is it such a big deal he told you these words
As a heartfelt friend advice?

Not all men
You're just too boring!
Can't take a ******* joke
And then think they're all terrible

So what if he's married and has a baby girl
Yet still watching **** in class and talk about
Getting underage girls?

So what if he has a younger sister
And talk with our classmates about
Wich one he's going to let be the lucky guy
That will make it in their house to take her at night?

Not all men
Stop being dramatic!
Boys will be boys
What's the catastrophe?

Not all men,
You just have to find the right one,
Who will tell you that boys are just like that,
And aren't intending to harm anyone.

He doesn't even think about how my heart sinks
When I talk about all these things
And I get back that I'm such a drama queen
Bacause that's just how people are
A laught doesn't turn them mean

Not all men
But how am I gonna trust a men
That joke at every woman they know
And act defenseless when the misogyny it's shown

Not all men,
I guess I want to believe it,
And that's why my heart aches so much,
Because always when I think I've found the right one,
The right friend, the right love

All men,
Not leaving one out at all,
Have proven me wrong so far,
And it hurts deeply,
Because I want to believe  it.
Not all men,
But all I've met so far.
Callamasttia Jun 5
"I've never experienced grief,"
I pondered for quite some time.
But in this pool of stagnation, I grieve each day,
An eternal punishment, as Sisyphus and his climb.

I grieve the life I dreamt of as a child,
To silence the screams at dinner.

I grieve the future we planned out
Before I saw you leaving.

I grieve golden hours in my living room,
With a book in hand and tea on the table,
In a house I never managed to buy.

I grieve my friends,
Who now reside in a distant dream future,
Where our worlds no longer collide.

I grieve my dream job,
Fulfilling work and festive nights,
Mornings being applauded for being a mastermind.

And most of all, I grieve,
Our future together,
Which I've dreamed of for years,
A house, plants, games, cats,
Dancing in the living room,
Purchasing new chairs,
Our cooking sessions at three a.m,
Knowing I'm loved for what I am.

Paper dreams,
Imaginary plans,
Tired smiles,
Our hidden dance.

I know I can get repetitive
So pardon me if I do
After all , what is grief
If not spiraling thoughs in a loop

My goals, plans so grand,
Smiles we shared, happiness at our hand,
Now are shattered, buried in the sand,
My is future lost and for that,
I grieve again.
Callamasttia Mar 21
I'm standing at the edge of this landscape.
I don't want to die; I just want to escape.
About to fly off, but there’s no hero's cape.

Standing at the edge of this landscape,
Last month, I thought it wasn't too late
To take a jump into the air as if it were a lake.
But now I see clearly, and there's no way.

I'm standing at the edge of this landscape.
It took me too long to realize that life doesn't negotiate.
It just sets its price, then comes and takes.

I was standing at the edge of this landscape
A few seconds ago, but now I'm falling while my lungs deflate.

Thought that I could change,
Somehow the hope was fake.
I knew I was never good at setting a pace.

At least for the first time, I don't hold hate
Of all that could be, this is the best place
To put my shoes aside and set my grave.

When my body becomes part of this landscape.
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