She’s walking alone on this particularly cold October night. Stopping occasionally to throw rocks into the near by pond. She has her ear buds in, she’s escaping. Music plays, as the cold air projects each breath. Life is about moments like this she thought, as the wind picked up and her bones ached beneath her chilled skin. It’s the world reminding us that’s it’s here, and that some people unfortunately will never be reminded of that again. She continues to walk as snow now begins to fall, and tree branches begin to shake. It’s a ****** moment she thought, but it’s still a moment. she decided to then lay down where she was standing. She happened to be on the third base of an old baseball field. The snow began to accumulate around her, covering the bases and glittering like a field of diamonds. Reminding her once again how beautiful even the small things are.

Beth, don’t let me break now, as I see you dancing throughout the house. You were always the stronger one, always smoothing over my not so perfect parts. I’m still waiting for you to walk through the front door. Shivering as you hang up your winter coat, and then smiling as you run to the warmth inside my arms. The memories  are becoming stronger every day your gone. Last night I sat out on our back porch and listened to the sound of rain drops. Imagining that every drop on my cheek was a soft kiss from your lips. Goosebumps crawling up my arms, leaving that weightless feeling inside my stomach; like you always did. I found myself smiling, hoping you were watching somewhere and smiling too. In short, I’ll carry you with me forever. Every wrinkle on my aging skin a constant reminder that soon we will be holding hands again.

I awake in the morning with her eye lashes along my pillow. The heat still lingering where she laid only hours before. I stretch my arms wishing they could land beneath her neck. She warned me that she couldn't stay but I'm not convinced. I see the way she looks at me. The way the shape of my body fills her pupils and all the empty space inside her heart. The way her feet shake right before she falls asleep, almost  eager to fall. I'm so close, I know I am. If only she would stay long enough for warm coffee in bed or to be awaken by gentle lips along her wrist. Some people ache when the sun goes down, for me it's always the mornings.

I've been watching from the ledge, as the world is in transit below. Every time you look at me, I know it's only a matter of time before I fall. I hope that when I do, I'll fall like a rain drop and settle along your lips.

Was it time,that really made us distant? The transition between strangers beds and arms. The words, the feelings, the promises, or the waking up after everythings gone. Here we are, back at square one trying to figure ourselves out. Pretending we are much stronger then we really are. I can still smell the perfume you wore our last night together. The words "I Love You" still appear on my mirror after a hot shower. The records are still in the order you left them in. I'm not sure I've ever really tried to forget you but I can't seem to remember your face.

The flower I placed behind your ear,
is withering dear.
In a way I never hope we do,
I'm only half of myself until I hold you.
You were always the better side,
Steering me clear in the darker nights.


I was skin and bones when I arrived,
But you loved me anyway.