He chose marriage, as an excuse to keep around the one person he knew he had already lost. You agreed, because you knew the wrecks we'd become if you didn't.

The wind glides across the table,
Stiff fall leafs take flight.
On their way to a different destination,
Twirling up and down.
Yellow and orange flicker against the sunlight,
Looks like glowing ambers dancing.
They settle along the cornfields and scarecrows,
October is rounding the corner again.

Darling, I have eyes for only you.
Faulty as they may be,
I promise not to blink.
In fear of missing the second,
you decide to notice me too.

You said you would be that light across the dock, the one you used to speak of.  The one that even if the fog rolled in and engulfed everything in view, it would never dull . You said you would be like a compass if I had ever got lost. Well, that time has came and that light is no longer vibrant. The Wolves howl along the tree lines, and the moon lays perfectly on the lake. I'm trying my best to navigate through the darkness and stars, leaving small objects to be found by. I've ventured quite far this time and fear this trip may be permanent. I have to say the forest at night is quite peaceful, life happening all around you. The acoustics of the owls and cracking branches. The leafs blowing about and the insects chirping. There's just so much more going on then we care to notice. Something tells me I'll be alright out here. Something tells me I never needed that light to find home.

He tries his best to ignore the beads of water forming on his eyelashes as he settles on a park bench. He stares blankly across an empty field lost in a memory from years back. Hand in hand two phantoms walked, barley visible as water blanketed them. He listened in as they spoke about the butterflies forming in their stomachs. Laughing uncontrollably every now and then, and about absolutely nothing. Question she says, " you think I'm beautiful?". I think your beyond beautiful he lipped without a single sound. Following the phantom's dialogue word for word. As the rain picked up, he snapped out of the moment; unfulfilled. At least I had it once he said, at least I know what it feels like.

There were bones on bones, covered by warming flesh. Marks were left on my neck, from where your lips had pressed. We sat and we spoke, about stars and the sky. We talked about living forever and about how we both would die. It was unreal how easy this was and it was clear these moments do not repeat. Underneath those summer street lights, you became a part of me.