You have questions
You wonder what led me to doing it
You wonder if l was ever happy
This is a letter from a dead soul
I thought l did not have a choice
I could not take the pain anymore
I tried being strong for years but inside
I was dying
With each year passing l had hopes that the pain will end but it ddnt
The pain never stopped  and l did not want to suffer anymore.
I wanted to be happy  like a normal
human being.
Then l saw an easy way out
I won't lie it wasn't hard
Pain versus pain
I became numb.
I swear l told myself l would stop
But with each cutting l grew to like it
I wanted to stop but l became addicted to hurting myself
Then the day came. My last day, to me it was going to be my last day cutting myself
But to the whole world  it was going to be my last day breathing
I took the razor and l cut my self
I dont know how or why but l hit the wrong vein
Then l was no more in the world
You might think it was your fault
You blame yourself
But l wrote this letter from my grave
So that l clarify things it was never your fault
I ruined me.

I lost someone close to my heart
I lost someone who can never be replaced
I lost what l wasn't suppose to lose
A mother
A best friend
A shoulder to cry on
My comforter
My protector
I did not just lose a mother
I lost someone who was
My everything
My world
Mama you have left a void that no.one will ever fill
I can not imagine life without you
I lost the most important person in my life
And am scared of losing myself right now

I lost someone close to my heart
I lost someone who can never be replaced
I lost what l wasn't suppose to lose
A mother
A best friend
A shoulder to cry on
My comforter
My protector
I did not just lose a mother
I lost someone who was
My everythin

ama you have left a void that no.one will ever fill

I can not imagine life without you
I lost the most important person in my life
And am scared of losing myself right now

I caught them staring
Whispering behind my back
I did not choose to be different
But yet they think it was my choice
I did not choose my skin colour
They look at me with ugly stares
I did not choose my race
To them am a curse
A taboo
But am only human
With a different skin tone
How do l reason with people
Who wish to **** me
They call me names
To them l am trash
And trash needs to be disposed
They are plotting against me
They are thinking of ways
To get rid of me
And l just wonder
What l ever did wrong
I just wonder if this hatred will ever stop

He said
I can't help but wonder
What if we were in quiet place
A place isolated from the noise of the world
A place blooming with scent flowers
The only noise is our intimate breaths
And that of nature being blown by steady winds
What if it was just the two of us
She said
What if
All of this is a dream
A dream we never want to wake up from
A dream that both of us enjoy yet at the same time scared of
A dream were only our souls 're entwined, our hearts 're binded but our bodies re in two different planets

write

Did l tell you
Why l write
No l did not
You never asked
I also wonder why you never bothered  
Probably you think
I write because
I am a writer
Easy right
No l don't write
because am a writer
But because
I breath poetry
I walk a step of poetry
I got my heart broken by poetry
My broken pieces were fixed by poetry
I fight poetry
I make love to poetry.
That's why l write
Not for fun but because am in too deep and l can't come out

Am done trying
They say giving up is for losers but
Am done
Am done being the fixer
Am done trying to be a good person
Am done trying to be the bigger person
Am done trying to fit in where am not wanted
If things are meant to be they will be
Am tired of apologising for my past mistakes
Am not going to beg for friendship, relationship or any other thing
My hearts gone bad and it won't beat for anyone

Dear darling my one and only
You make my heart flatter in ways l cant explain
How could someone make me feel this way
The feeling is unexplainable but it brings joy to my innerself
I never understood the power of love until l met you
Oh my darling sweetheart
My heart has chosen you
You have found a perfect spot in my heart
You now have the only thing l swore l wouldn't give anyone
You have my heart now keep it safe
My precious darling

Linked by words
Binded together by our hearts
We are entwined
Always forever thats us
Nothing, no one or anything can come  between us
The Romeo and Juliet's love was nothing compared to us
Bonnie and Clyde never experienced what we had
Till death do us apart those ate just words for some people not us
Death can never do us apart
For we are entwined and our love is written in the stars
Together we build some thing great
We are entwined

They are scared of you, young woman
Do you see how they shiver when you speak
How they become furious when you walk in your crown with your head held high
Do you see the hatred in their eyes when you become as educated as they are
Young women you are the future and they are frightened by that
When you put on those gloves and start fighting
When you put on a smile as you walk towards your achievements
When you put on your heels and stand tall with you head held high
They are scared of you young women

I am a woman
A strong, beautiful and bold woman
Perfection is something am not for the word itself does not exist in my dictionary
My scars show the rough edges of life l have endured
Am a woman
I receive  punches, slaps and insults
I am someone's punching bag
However l go around with a smile in my face and my head held high
I am a Survivor
I am a woman l lose things even when am careful not to lose them
I lose babies but l still try hoping one day l will have them
For l am a Survivor
I carry all the load, all the pain and the hurt but l dont stumber
I might cry, l might fall but that doesn't mean am weak
I am what l am but do not underestimate me because am a woman
I've been through all the bad phases of life but l've never relapsed because l am a Survivor

How can they not see us?
Whilist we are right beside them
How can they forget that we exist?
Whilist we breath the same air as them
What wrong did we do?
All they do is look at us with hatred
They dont even ask what made us choose the life we are leaving
All they do is judge us
They always conclude that we are no good
If only they could ask us what brought us to the streets
We all have a story to tell
We all have our reasons
Not every home is a home
How could you judge us before giving us an opportunity to speak
When we try to speak our truth
They assume the worst in us
We are dirt under their eyes
They have forgotten that we are also human beings
They have forgotten that we exist
They have forgotten that our lives matter
They have forgotten us but we live not to forget
We remember the tragic we faced and the choices we made that led us to who we are today and where we are

I've never been so inlove
True love in my life
Whenever l think about it
I can't help it but feel one hundred percent happy
As cliched as it sounds l feel in love
with myself
Self love
No one can love me the way l love me
That is true love
No one understands me better than me
And when every one leaves l will be left with myself
True love

I am
A person, strong and able person
I may have flaws but there are never my weakness
My scars show who l am
They show the pain and suffering l had ve been through
I am
A survivor , been fighting my demons my enemies and yet here l am standing still
Giving up does not exist in my dictionary
For l am
A human
I make mistakes but l learn from them l never do the same mistake twice
I Am who l am no.one Will change that