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I enjoy watching the sunrise,
on the porch in my chair,
morning coffee.. first cigarette
I could be dying.. I still wouldn't care

Breathing life into vision
the colors erupt as the light invades
the warmth spreads to me
a splash of hope.. a splendid taste.

The way the dew glimmers
while trees dance in the wind
the birds sing their song
almost absolving my sins.

Experiences like this keep me grateful
for the hardship I endure.
I don't take medicine for my depression..
a dose of reality is the cure.

The sun tires almost instantly
I see by the pink streaked sky.
I extinguish my last cigarette..
as the light says its goodbye.
So many words to you
I have left to say
So many nights to god
I lay awake and pray
I just want to tell you
How broken down Inside
The pieces of me struggle
fitting together in my mind
The shadow I cast grows
consuming all and me
I try to run but can't escape
This apathy..anger and agony
I toss and turn at night
Reaching for you in my bed
Which has grown so large lately
I am simply entombed in dread
They say time is the cure
be patient you will see
But I fear there is no time
this pain will never leave
The moon illuminates
the pictures on the wall
Inside my conscience speaks
and answers to your call..
Have I lost my mind?
Please god let me forget
She's somewhere laughing loving..
and I am burried in regret
There are so many questions
Seeking refuge in my head..
Look at the clock.. 4am..
Guess I'll sleep when I'm dead.
Stay
One more day
Today
I'll pour the liquor away
If you stay
One more day
Loneliness is gray
It smells like smoke
It tastes like chocolate with no taste
It sounds like a mute man
It feels like no one wants you
It looks like a rose dying in the desert
Loneliness is a stab in the heart
She wasn't his world.  

She built it for him.
She poured in sunlight with her smile.
His nighttime came when she was sad.
The glint in her eyes made his stars.  
Her fingers played the tune he hummed.
Her feet walked on every surface that he would come to call home.  
She made it all for him.

And wanted nothing in return.

But sometimes,  as a small gift,

He would borrow a little bit of the sky and put it back in her eyes.
So that they would be blue again.
So that the glint would be brighter than ever once more.
He did all this for her.

Even though she never once asked for it.
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