I hope people who are in love
appreciate what they have
because it’s people who are out of love
like me
who realise
the value of that gift

I wonder what it feels like
to love another human.
I wonder what it feels like
to have butterflies
when you see someone
when you hold someone
because
i’ve never felt it
but i’ve read about it
but i’ve imagined it
but i’ve dreamed about it
but i’ve longed for it
but i’ve never had it.
i wonder what it would feel like
if someone saw me
and had those butterflies.
and felt nervous
and excited
and happy

I’m slowly worrying
that I may never feel it.
But it would drive me crazy
because i am not normal
and i’m scared ill give
too much of myself to someone
and get lost
in another human
but i wonder what it feels like
to have butterflies
when you see someone

Grey blankets mask the sky
The jaws of winter
bite into my skin
Warm leather seats embrace me
Melancholy rain splashes on the bonnet
kissing and caressing
A river from God himself
Some people
feel the rain
and others
others
they just get wet

When will my soul be at peace with me
When there’s a void inside as deep as the sea

Tired of transient pleasures and memory
A longing for something not temporary

An aching for happiness that does not seem to tire
How can a soul be free when its enslaved by its desires?