If a tale need be tattled,
the snawky Snawk would arise.
With its snickley tongue of arsenic blue,
and loathsome gamboge eyes.

To the King of the stickley Snicklers,
the Snawk would spill his talk.
But scuttlebutt was all t'was,
for he was but a snawky Snawk.

Might you ask
who am I be?
I am a jawky Jawk
who talks incessantly

of the snawky Snawk,
with his snickley tongue,
and his breath of kyarn,
and Beelzebub dung.

You see I knows of him all too well
and well he knows of me.
Invidious brothers, one of the other,
same Mother both have we.

Now the snawky Snawk spins yarns
so dark and thick and odious.
One might find his fatuous canards
to be though flatulent, commodious.

But If ye be a gawky Gawk
of the snawky Snawk beware,
For his loathsome camboge eyes
can squinny a ribald stare.

To your knees his gaze will bring you,
you'll tell all the tales you know.
Then he'll tattle them to the Snickler King
and off to the headsman you will go.

That is, unless, you know the ballad
the Snawk is most offended by.
'bout the frowzy blowzy stable boy
with only just one eye.

He lost his eye in a snickering match
twixt The Snickley King and he.
But got the best of the old nabob,
for he could cachinnate you see.

He did cachinnate and aggravate,
till the old King did concede.
The stable boy was the better of the two,
his tongue cut like a snickersnee.

For the frowzy blowzy stable boy
was not able to tell a lie,
nor could he mince his words with honey,
of the truth he could not hide.

And if one day you find yourself
in the land of the quidnunc kith.
Shun the snickley Snicklers,
and their sniggering King forthwith.

But if ye meet up with the stable boy
though untidy he may be.
Dare not tattle of a soul,
he'll let fly his snickersnee.

And remember well, the ballad he sings,
of the King he did do down.
Drink in its waspy strain and keep it nigh,
lest the snawky Snawk cometh 'round.

I know a guy that smells like kyarn
Like he's been working in ******
knees deep out on a farm

his hair is long and *****
he's unaware of a brush
But he seems to be happy
and I keep looking for him to flush

He eats the little squirrels
He shoots out of the tree in the yard
he says five makes a meal
I say he's a ******

I have to take him seriously
Sometimes it's really hard
his nose is always running
One day it ran too far

I always get a belly laugh
When he tries to confess his love
I just start praying, Mercy
Have mercy from above