Eyes so deep you could fill a pit, don't stare to much you could easily slip, into this hell where I reside, two black pools i have for eyes.  
Can u hear the screams from within, the light shutsdown and the hurt begins, its only my mind I tell myself, I don't want anything like material wealth I would be happy but I can't because of mental health.
There's plenty of professionals who tell me where I,m going wrong, they say take the medication and be strong.
But seems like the years are not letting up,
But seems like the medication is making me stuck in this deep spiral I call the abyss and though I try to be brave sometimes all I hear is my grave.
If my beautiful children were not around I would surely be six foot in the ground.

Why do I keep clutching my chest, I need to give that lennie and bud a rest, Or its a definite CARDIAC ARREST.
I know this well in my life, but I get weak around my demons, they always come when I,m weak around life.
What would you do to break free I tried most ways trust me but the demons come always on my bad days, sad ways.
I can be good for months on end then I meet one of my friends thats the devil in disguise,
Believe it or not I will die if I don't make new friends and at least try.
I get stuck in quick sand, its like I,m playing poker and always throwing my hand.
I had chances now I,m going to make a stand.
Because I know that with the love my kids bring really I should be singing and dancing.

Looking down to the one you love, all that pain all that  hurt is all to much.                      
No movement, still as the night, screaming and shouting please you need to fight.
But its no good they can't hear, blood caked in tangled hair,no movement not even a twitch the docs saying we will have turn off the switch.
In all the years and all the days hearing that doc left me in daze, reeling about inside my head,
I don't believe that their brain dead. So tell me am I selfish for not wanting to switch that machine off , my eyes streaming while I sputter and cough.
I tell myself the docs know best while I kiss your forehead and let you rest.

Today's the day I get really low,     I know people say hey you should be over that by now and let things go, but when u lose your DNA you can't see anything in front of you not even a day, not even a second not even a way.  Life took that laugh , that frown ,that always being a clown that peice of jigsaw it still leaves me raw but i smile still *** my DNA lives

Envy is a dangerous thing it breeds away deep within, jealous thoughts start to stir inside my head it starts to whir.                         Can I control the thoughts of greed of wanting more of what I need, when all my brothers and sisters bleed.                                          Material things have no feelings like capitalism and consumer dealings, god help my brothers and sisters hungry starving and cold, their mothers and fathers are to old to carry the can so why can't the world make a plan and help their fellow man.

If I were true to thee, you could at least be true to me.
I said it before u walked out the door, we can,t be together anymore.                                               So I take solace in the quiet of pain, dust myself down and start again no more sunshine just rain. But thru the dark clouds of life I see a shimmer of hope and no it's not hanging by a six foot rope, I am strong in life but weak in love.  I beat my self up all the time the only way out is when I rhyme.

When we die where do we go does any one care or any one know, will it be fast or will it be slow.                                                         I pray it will be fast so the pain won't last, when I,m layed out on my death bed taking my last gasps.                                                 As this old heart starts to palpitate my mouth gets dry and my pupils dilate, my vision clouds over now I can't wait.