what do you have against me?
you're only scared of a baby
an unborn child
and a happy family

maybe you don't know
how much i love him
or how tight i embraced him
after he piled my clothes
on his front door

maybe you don't know
how i accept him
his anger and his howls

maybe you don't know
how he sees home
in my eyes

maybe you don't know
how he loves me
oh, so honestly

oh, maybe
that's what you have
against me
i have true love
and you don't

Boldly Go Where Your Heart Beats It's Verse,
Don't Believe That You Can't Find Your Worth
You Are Golden, Brilliant In The Sun
Don't Forget Someone Loves You Now, My Son

Sleep So Silently, You'll Rise Smile On Your Face
Don't Desire Age, Don't Lose Your Sense of Place
Revel In Your Innocence, The World Won't Seem So Strange
You're Beautiful, You're Beautiful, And Safe.

Don't Miss Your Chance To Be,
Who You're Destined To Be.
Love Everyone You Come Across,
Chase Your Dreams, And Never Stop.

Boldly Go Where Your Heart Beats It's Verse,
Don't Believe That You Can't Find Your Worth
You Are Golden, Brilliant In The Sun
Don't Forget Someone Loves You Now, My Son

an alcohol infused less than five-feet human being also feels like what humans could feel, to find someone who would really love you is phenomenal. it could feel like the first day of high school or the ringing bell. opening birthday presents or the thin ice cold mint that travels through your nostrils. lifting your right feet up higher than you can or for as long as you could hold his hand during the winter storm. stepping on the sand feeling the corals and the caudal fins of those miniscule creatures inhabiting the sea where you lingered burying your feet deeper and deeper feeling them dissipate. smelling freshly baked cookies or pouring moscato in the morning. wearing a different pair of socks and checking the doorknob 42 times. pulling a microscopic thin thread out of your plastic button or making sure that the wooden tiles are staying where they should. washing your hands every after five minutes or smelling the musk of a new book. writing while you wonder where he could be, would he love the strokes or the way you chase the changing weather? the way you carelessly laugh and your creative ways to put life in the jungle varmint or putting your head on his chest and feel like you belong there, that's when you know that there is something sweeter than heirloom wine.

I could no longer breathe
The air inside our room
I could no longer stand
His deep sleep
With my deep eyes

The pillow was sipping my salty tears
And my organs were begging to leave
But I don’t know what to do
Because my body was too cold
I don’t have a hand to hold
And my story could never be told

He said he didn’t want a girl
Who couldn’t take care of herself
He said I was “messed up”,
A “psychotic *******”
But I knew I really loved him
Because I didn’t hate him
After spitting those words to me
While I was down in the dump
And had no one to run to

He never saw
That I loved every part of him
Every emotion, every inch of his skin
Every part that I have yet to know
But now I know
That he only loves me when I’m happy

I don’t know how he could sleep
While watching me swim in my tears
But I can tell you that he still loves me
Because I heard him said he’s sorry
But then he yelled again

He said he didn’t want to hear me cry
For a second I thought it was sweet
And he yelled and yelled
And told me to leave
But he was the one who left
So I have no where to go
For the place I call home
Asked me to leave him alone

beginnings are ideally beautiful
but we didn't have one
so i carried it with me
letting it crawl on my veins
my heart and in my brain
while he holds my burning hand
kisses my burning cheeks
and carrying my white bones

he stayed, when i left him
over and over
he tried when i gave up
over and over
still i thought,
that maybe
he does not love me at all

until i recognized
my silly brain
my silly thoughts
and silly fears

he does love me
but my brain
created the catastrophes
and embellished
the tremblings
in my heart

but he was there
holding me tightly
calming the storms
in my deadly brain
whispering
that he will stay

why should i leave
this boy who tried
over a battle my brain created
and a problem
i never solved

until i told my silly brain
to start a new beginning
with the boy
who tried again
because true love belongs
to those who never failed
to try again
and again
and again

may i ask? since when did you not like here
and since when did you cry on a new year
didn't we swear to always bury our feet
until the skirmishes of the day descends?

you saw all our pipe dreams and hopes
even under the darkest sky and the cold weather
but why have you lost them under the blinding rays?

our world was only of the sweetest scent
was only of the most beautiful sunlight
and was only of the kindest critters and souls.

they left and they were meant to
may it be in this lifetime or not
it's not anyone's fault
and no one deserves the blame.

should you not drown yourself
in the salt water, where it doesn't belong
instead face up the sky
until the storm calms
and the sun comes
and we shall repeat
until our time comes