My eyes keep seaching for you
and my fingers keep longing for your touch

Do you know how many times
I think of you and hold my breath?

And when someone mentions you,
the clouds make space for the sunshine,
the ocean tide disappears
and the earth stops rotating

Forgive me please
for not telling you
that I'd rather be a molecule of oxygen
in your lungs for ten seconds
than a minute apart from you

They speak about addiction
with such disdain
but how do I explain
that my addiction to you
is the only reason I'm still sane?

Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night
walk around the balcony
and pray to God
we'll find each other again

I've been stuck in this rut and I can't seem to get out.
I'm sitting here with no inspiration and just writing how I feel.
I'm feeling lost and alone for some reason.
I feel hurt and scared.
I feel like being happy is just hard right now.
I don't know what to do.

There's so many thing I wish we could be.
But there were so many time that you left me over nothing.
You pushed me away and I wanted to stay with you.
There were so many girls that gave you their world but nothing would do.
How cold is your heart?
Must be freezing in the depths.
How dark are your eyes?
They don't compare to the sky at night no more, no more.

What a terrifying day to be alive
What a terrifying week
What a terrifying year

50 lives lost
No a single rainbow is shining down on us today

I cry for the lives of the people i never knew
and i cry because we never know what those souls could have done for our world

Another day older, but i feel so small
Nothing i can do, but mourn and hope for a better tomorrow

Justice went un served for a victim who spoke out,
and the rest of us cry, because we didn't have the courage

Why cant the world see non consensual *** does not exist
There's  only one word for it, and its ****

All the horror going on around me, each tear falling from my eyes is bringing each small ounce of hope and happiness with it

This week i have told myself i don't want to live on this planet,
but that's a slap in the face to everybody who no longer has the chance

Tomorrow i will be a better me, i will honor the lives lost to violence and hate. I will put forth more generosity, kindness, and understanding for the ones around me who lack it. I will not give up. The people committing these horrible acts of violence and intolerance need me to be the best person that i can be.

It's 12:43 am and I still want you here.
I'm losing myself in waiting for you.
I know you won't come to me.
You surprise me from time to time.
You stood up for me without thinking about it.
You have no idea how much it means to me.
And now I'm just writing nonsense and waiting for you still.
I'm lost again.
Please save me.