Fed up with the ways of men,
I decided to create my own,
And he would be perfect.

I took a chunk of wood and began to carve,
My knife coaxing each perfect body part into existence:
Dark eyes
Full lips
Broad shoulders
Long legs
Strong hands
And a perfect...well...you know.

Then I carved the magic word into his chest
And he became flesh.

He did everything a woman wanted:
He listened well
Never talked back
Never got mad
Made love on command
And said those words we all crave
"I love you"

All with eyes as empty as bottomless pits.