She sprays her hair a lot
Doesn’t care about the climate
She says it keeps her looking hot
And she doesn’t even need to diet.
She drives to school driving
Her daddy’s fancy gift car.
She goes happily because
That’s where cute boys are.

She’s the Great American Co-ed
And intelligence is not important.
Someone saying ‘no’ to her are
Words she finds most discordant.
She only likes to hear ‘yes dear’
For her life to being going fine.
Everyone just has to understand
And then they must toe the line.

She’s a grade C student
Because she doesn’t like books.
But, she has no trouble
With boys because of her looks.
She is a willing target as well;
She likes any guy in pants.
Maybe even a rich guy who
Will buy her expensive implants.

She knows she will be
The most popular girl around
If she can just get her blog
Going strong and off the ground.
She has lots of cool photos
Of her in her bikini bathing suit.
She also has her phone number
And her measurements to boot.

She’s the Great American Co-ed
And daddy has paid for University.
She is afraid she might not get in
Due to the law about racial diversity
But she is sure her daddy will
Call in some markers owed by friends.
He’s done it before and she bets
He’ll gladly do it one more time again.