Though
At times
I'm not sure why...
I'm sure there is a reason

I lie in bed
Awake last night
Imagining the day
I watched my friend burn alive

I asked myself
Why did I have to be there?
Why did his dad knock on MY door?
Couldn't it have been someone else?
Because those images are something
I cannot erase

Did seeing this
Make me stronger?
Was it meant to make me wise?
Or perhaps the only reason
Was to teach me to treasure life

It's been three months
Sense that day
And the images, I thought
Would go away
But still I lie awake at night
Thinking of it all
And it drives me insane

The way your brother lay
Your burnt body upon the driveway
And you gasped desperately for clean air
When the sirens were closing in
The old woman pulled me away
Into a hug
And asked me if I knew the boy
I said yes. Sense preschool
She said I shouldn't see this

Why did I have to see it?

To the firefighters, I was a witness
I had to give them everything I knew

They offered me trauma counseling
As to undo what had been done
But he died two days later
And I'd give anything to take that back

I couldn't save him
I only tried to help
Why did i have to be the one
To put the burden upon myself?

We never talked a day in our lives
But his life seemed to precious to me

When it came down to it,
I did my best to be there
When I should have let them be

Why must I be plagued with this memories?