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Apr 2021 · 276
spite
Samantha Apr 2021
**** HIM
this is how i feel
Mar 2021 · 545
Him
Samantha Mar 2021
Him
he's the one that i want
he's the one that i need
he makes me happy
he makes me mad
he makes me cry
he makes me laugh
he clears my mind
he opens my heart
through rain or shine
it's him that i love
forever my love
it's him
he's the one
i love you austin
Mar 2021 · 259
True Love Is...
Samantha Mar 2021
waking up next to you
the way you look at me
i can always tell when you're lying
and you know when i'm about to cry
we can finish each other's sentence
but you still surprise me every day
you know how to make me laugh
i know what you want
we want the same thing
true love
Mar 2021 · 344
BPD
Samantha Mar 2021
BPD
Shattering the space around me
The air itself is static
My skin-too fragile
Scratch me, drag the nails through and through
Cut to the bone-
Your words
My skin-too fragile
You don't understand
The dagger in my ear
Infecting my mind with poison
Poison running through my veins-
I stop still
Don't move-
DANGER
I can't take it
The words you haven't said
Pushing me over the edge
I live on a narrow line of sanity
Even the slightest stir in the atmosphere
Even the slightest touch
I lose my grip, falling off the edge of reality
I lose myself
please spread awareness. bpd is a serious mental disorder.
Mar 2021 · 475
Riddles
Samantha Mar 2021
My head's becoming weary
Of all these heavy words
To put them down on paper
Is far too much work
My mind spins round in riddles
Dizzy and absurd
Shall I rest my head
Or shall I let it turn
Sep 2020 · 218
Broken Heart
Samantha Sep 2020
Why
Why do you
Describe it so gently
As if it were glass
And could shatter
Love is not broken
So easily
In fact
It's not broken at all
It's larger than life
And not easy to lose
Always in sight
And has nothing to prove
Quite confident,
It is!
But easily fooled...
Some find this amusing
And make it a ruse
oh Let's bully this love
Make it believe that we care!
oh How we will laugh
When it's shocked and impaired!
Embarrassed and abashed
At the lies and the dare
But love is alive
And some think it's quite folly
That it's stupid and jolly
That through all in all
It continues about
Patient and welcome
And kind
And no doubts
And with time it matures
It never hates on the haters
And lets truth be spoken
Love lives in your heart .

And your heart is what's broken.
Love is Strong
May 2020 · 144
blur
Samantha May 2020
the day a blur
its bright, i'm sure
it leaks and stirs
but theres no cure
the dark, it lures
i will endure
May 2020 · 157
the most
Samantha May 2020
you were the most i've ever loved
your best was better
and your worst was worse
now my love life
is surely cursed
for in the eyes
of potential lovers
i see the love
they will never live up to
May 2020 · 204
😇
Samantha May 2020
he called me an angel
Apr 2020 · 142
blame
Samantha Apr 2020
you walked away from me
and blamed me for not chasing after you
Apr 2020 · 126
mutual
Samantha Apr 2020
i think it would be easier to get over you
if i didn't know you still have feelings for me too
Apr 2020 · 121
more love than pain
Samantha Apr 2020
even though it's over
i still find myself happy at times
because i know how much i loved you
that's what keeps me going
so i'm not over you
there's more love than there is pain
i will always love you
i guess that's why i'm okay
i know my love is true
when my heart was broken
my love didn't fly out
instead it stays within
content in knowing it was never a lie
Apr 2020 · 143
never loved before
Samantha Apr 2020
i'm just now realizing
i've never really loved anyone before you
what a fool to think i have
nothing was quite as true
as how i feel about you
Apr 2020 · 121
cut off before the knot
Samantha Apr 2020
if i'm being honest
i think i only started to love you
after it was already over
never got a chance
Apr 2020 · 122
I Shall Not Weep
Samantha Apr 2020
In another life
I know we are together
In another life
The distance wouldn't matter
In another life
I know I shall not weep
In another life
I know our love would keep
And though this life is dismal
And though this life is poor
I know that we are happy
In another world
Sometimes I wonder what if
But then I catch myself
There is more to this
Than what we could have been
And I know that it is futile
To try and cut you off
And though it hurts to see you
It's better than nothing at all
I wonder if it was easy
For you to break it off
I wonder if it's easy
For you to just move on
Apr 2020 · 153
In This World
Samantha Apr 2020
In this world
Of sickness or health
In this world
Of distance or wealth
In this world
In this time
I know I can't be yours
You know you can't be mine
To all the couples who have been torn apart due to the virus and/or quarantine.
Apr 2020 · 117
Why We Try
Samantha Apr 2020
you say it's ******* hard
but i already know
i said thats why we try
but then i watched you go
Apr 2020 · 115
Sweet Spot
Samantha Apr 2020
how do i find that sweet spot
i want them to be happy
even when i'm not
Samantha Apr 2020
"You accept the love you think you deserve."
                                                
                                                                     - Stephen Chbosky
Apr 2020 · 162
You Broke My Heart
Samantha Apr 2020
It's funny how the heart continues to love even after it's been broken.
I love you, Daddy <3
Apr 2020 · 120
come up for air, babe
Samantha Apr 2020
i stood there wondering what it was that i was feeling
i don't know how long i stood there
i couldn't even tell you if i was actually standing
i could't tell my body from the ground or the people around me
the only thing i know is that it was raining that day
it was remarkable really
i've never know the weather to move through walls before
i tried to look up to see the rainclouds that lurked in over my head
but i only saw the back of my eyelids
i wondered if i really was blind
was i always?
i heard the thunder then
and the lightning struck me
it was her voice
and i felt my heart shatter

stop
feeling
everything

open your eyes
you're not blind
you're just scared
scared of the truth
open your eyes
and take things as they come

it's not rain, babe
those are tears
it's time to come up for air
it's time to catch your breath
it's time to breath

I opened My eyes
and I saw Her

I opened My eyes
and I saw Myself
i see you
Apr 2020 · 134
fit
Samantha Apr 2020
fit
i thought i had found the words that fit the feeling
but it turns out the feeling doesn't fit into words
this isn't love.
this is more.
this is us.
Apr 2020 · 85
in awe
Samantha Apr 2020
amazed
and confused
that you find me the subject
of your love and affection

...

what a wonderful world
and of all people
Apr 2020 · 79
Broken Heart
Samantha Apr 2020
Why
Why do you
Describe it so gently
As if it were glass
And could shatter
Love is not broken
So easily
In fact
It's not broken at all
It's larger than life
And not easy to lose
Always in sight
And has nothing to prove
Quite confident,
It is!
But easily fooled...
Some find this amusing
And make it a ruse
oh Let's bully this love
Make it believe that we care!
oh How we will laugh
When it's shocked and impaired!
Embarrassed and abashed
At the lies and the dare
But love is alive
And some think it's quite folly
That it's stupid and jolly
That through all in all
It continues about
Patient and welcome
And kind
And no doubts
And with time it matures
It never hates on the haters
And lets truth be spoken
Love lives in your heart .

And your heart is what's broken.
Love is Strong.
Apr 2020 · 76
Him
Samantha Apr 2020
Him
I want to make him happy
What can I really do?

Sometimes I catch him laughing
At my point of view

He says that I surprise him;
That every day is new

He says I make him happy;
I brighten up the blues

I love to be his sunshine
I love to be his muse

But between a brighter world
And a happy me and you

Between me and the world
What would you really choose?

I hate to take perspective
And focus on what I'd lose

But I want him to be happy
What can I really do?

I want to make you happy.
Tell me what to do.
For Brian
Samantha Apr 2020
Thank you all so much for your strength and positivity in these hard times! Your hard work is greatly appreciated by all!! Continue the support of Healthcare workers everywhere!! <3 <3 <3
COVID-19
Apr 2020 · 111
#Stayhome
Samantha Apr 2020
please stay safe
COVID-19
Apr 2020 · 141
Stuck At Home/Wanting You
Samantha Apr 2020
sometimes i think
its still not real
hungover from the time i steal
i wonder what drew you to me
i wonder if our bond will keep

stuck at home
you're far away
please don't get weary
of my way

every day
the same sweet face
every day
the same fixed place

stuck at home
but wanting you
stuck at home
will you stay true?
"We got this babe!" - Brian <3
Dec 2019 · 680
Genuine
Samantha Dec 2019
Kindness, to me
It's kind of like a flower
Only every time I'm given one
It's poisonous and thorny
They ***** me and fill me with betrayal
And turn to ash in my hands
How am I to know
That your kindness is genuine
That you don't want to hurt me
And even if you don't
I still know that every flower
Will die in the end
How can I trust you?
Nov 2019 · 268
Code of This Moment
Samantha Nov 2019
62 65 61 75 74 69 66 75 6c 20 6c 69 66 65 0a 69 20 72 65 61 63 68 20 6f 75 74 20 74 6f 20 74 6f 75 63 68 0a 73 6c 75 6d 62 65 72 20 69 6e 20 74 68 65 20 6e 69 67 68 74 0a 64 6f 65 73 20 6e 6f 74 20 61 6d 6f 75 6e 74 20 74 6f 20 6d 75 63 68 0a 61 73 20 74 68 65 20 70 61 69 6e 20 6f 66 20 74 68 65 20 64 61 79 0a 69 73 20 74 68 72 6f 62 62 69 6e 67 20 61 6e 64 20 66 61 64 69 6e 67 20 61 77 61 79 0a 74 68 69 73 20 6d 6f 6d 65 6e 74 20 69 20 61 6d 20 69 6d 70 6f 72 74 61 6e 74 0a 6a 75 73 74 20 61 20 6d 6f 6d 65 6e 74 20 6f 66 20 79 6f 75 72 20 64 61 79
Nov 2019 · 241
Step by Step
Samantha Nov 2019
step by step
by step by step
my arms the rungs
i lift them up
to a better place
than they were before
and never asking for a hand
afraid that they would change their minds
and decide i wouldn't be good enough
for them to step all over me
as if it were a privilege
to be used
by them
Nov 2019 · 200
Sweet
Samantha Nov 2019
Your sweet smile brings me back to a time when I actually thought you were made of sugar...
don't mistake salt for sugar - rupi kaur
Nov 2019 · 129
my love
Samantha Nov 2019
my love is handsome
and cute
and funny
and smart
not just smart but intelligent
he thinks im pretty
he laughs with me
he watches cartoons with me
he helps with cleaning
he kisses me
he holds me
i love him
he loves me
now i only need to find him
he must be somewhere in this world
i hope i meet him soon
Nov 2019 · 130
Poison
Samantha Nov 2019
beautiful poison
sickly sweet
***** my finger on a thorn
my blood as red as the petals of a rose
you hold my heart
and wrap it in barbed wire
i feel so safe
and so dangerous
i could spend my last seconds on this earth
******* poison from your lips
Nov 2019 · 138
3 Shots
Samantha Nov 2019
3 shots of whiskey and a box of thin mints is all it took to get over u...
now what would it take for you to get over yourself?
Nov 2019 · 178
NOW HIRING
Samantha Nov 2019
BOYFRIEND/SIGNIFICANT OTHER

-REQUIREMENTS:
-must be from 15 to 19
-must not be a hick
-must not be an *******
-must be sweet but also have a backbone
-must be able to handle crazy
-probably should be crazy
-must want something real
-must have a sense of humor
-must watch cartoons
-must be loyal
-must not be aggressive
-must want true love

                 -future gf
btw im broke. this is a pro bono job
Oct 2019 · 371
Everything But Good Enough
Samantha Oct 2019
how is it that this one boy can make me feel as if i'm not enough and too much all at the same time?
Oct 2019 · 127
addicted
Samantha Oct 2019
addicted to the way you break my heart
Oct 2019 · 717
Sorry
Samantha Oct 2019
i'm not sorry
for offering you
my love
i'm sorry
that you don't recognize
it's value
i'm sorry
you don't
deserve me
i'm sorry
for every time
you cheat yourself
out of finding
true love
but i'm not sorry
for myself
because it's your loss
not mine
Oct 2019 · 149
love to hate
Samantha Oct 2019
i hate you for not letting me save you
Oct 2019 · 125
Personally
Samantha Oct 2019
I was there.
When it all went to ****.
Don't you remember?
I held your hand.
I stood by your side.
I took every bullet.
Just to keep you safe.
But it didn't last.
Because apparently I'm too complicated to be a doormat...
Oct 2019 · 341
Fatal Flaw
Samantha Oct 2019
You are this perfect image of everything I could ever want. But everybody has flaws. Your single flaw is a fatal one. Because your single flaw just happens to be the one that makes you want to destroy every single good thing that comes your way. Including me.
Oct 2019 · 92
Tempting
Samantha Oct 2019
u think that i dont notice
every time i look up
ur eyes look back at me
but i thought i knew u didnt want me
and i guess ur having second thoughts
because now im not there
and now u want me back
well i guess u missed ur chance
but every time i catch ur glance
its tempting me...
Oct 2019 · 669
someone
Samantha Oct 2019
every time i think someone might actually care...
Oct 2019 · 197
For Gabriel
Samantha Oct 2019
beautiful
and broken
they tell me he won't stay
but his eyes are scars inside my mind
and I know my will won't sway
they don't understand how good he is
he understands the words I twist
he knows my soul, and I won't go
beautiful
and broken
is my love's heart of gold
beautiful
and broken
they tell me he will fade
but his words are scars inside my heart
and I know my love won't stray
they don't understand the place he's in
he understands the life I live
we know we're broken, but my heart is sold
to a beautiful boy
with a heart of gold

I love you, Gabe
Jun 2019 · 167
Some Months Ago
Samantha Jun 2019
Some months ago I thought I'd never get used it-
Seeing you with her.
Some months ago I thought it'd always hurt-
Seeing you with her.
Now it's just just a fact that I'll be-
Seeing you with her.
Now I'm not so sad that I'll be-
Seeing you with her.
It doesn't feel half bad when I see you-
Seeing me with him.
Jun 2019 · 237
Bloom
Samantha Jun 2019
blooming buds and puddle suds

   rainy days and little fawn graze

                    dandelion seeds and petals in the breeze

           morning dew and skies so blue

               you think of me, I think of you
Apr 2019 · 163
Down Again
Samantha Apr 2019
Moments there are when I'm high,

A feeling I can't quite describe,

Nights are the most lonely times,

But when the sun comes up I'm down again.

Quickly swept into the day,

The wind picks up and makes me sway,

Both friends and strangers will me to stay,

But I go home and I'm down again.

The highs and lows of now and then's,

My moods seem to swing on a pendulum,

I'll visit places I've never been,

But when I return I'm down again.
Mar 2019 · 179
Amber Fly
Samantha Mar 2019
I want to keep each moment, trapped like an amber fly

But they pass right through my fingers, no matter how I try

Seconds turn to minutes, days and weeks go by

These moments I am losing, I want to keep them mine

I want to keep each moment, trapped like an amber fly
Feb 2019 · 249
Bittersweet
Samantha Feb 2019
I'm happy to see the happiness of others,
But I'm afraid my heart can't take it.
Even so, I can't help but wonder:
If we were still together, would you just fake it?
Can't help but know that it was never real for you.
And it makes me feel like a fool for thinking you ever actually cared.
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