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Greenie Oct 2016
look at me with
       unseeing eyes, fevered cheeks,
so I reach
down into my throat and pull out my stomach.
Here. Here! Touch! Taste!
This is me! Thus I am!

I clench it in my fists. I squeeze, nails subducting into pinkish jellies.
I lunge wildly for their mouths, I smear.
~Alas, they also lack tongues.
Oct 2016 · 907
And the hare said no`°~.
Greenie Oct 2016
Fridays are for drowning.
Tipsy, tipsy, let me ~shell out my kidneys.
-Says he works at the smoothie bar, looks at me, has a heroic jawline, I

stumble.

Waves lash ankles, steer comatose foams - my waist is grabbed at as i slog into waters.

Smiles, nods, propels with wide eyes.

I ate with a fork.
Oct 2016 · 833
If lost is contagious
Greenie Oct 2016
Numbed spines, turn-table minds of froth and iron, we shook-
Holding the flashlight while he wrenched at engine and rubber in the rain. Ward of the physical touch. When it wasn't too wet, we'd paint the windshield to match infinity then get in and drive. Drive, just go! As we
Implode.

Or lie in feilds. How many they are, numerous as stars, grassbeds sprinkled with violets and clover. -So similar. So same. The roads (we'd race, tires screeching, screaming, outrunning, false) and clouds that look like bedroom windows.

Anything's better than home when you don't know you're sick.
Oct 2016 · 297
Sir Sweets
Greenie Oct 2016
You painted me pink and gold, wrapped around me ribbons of it to become my skin, my hair, ribbon. Would let the loose ends fly, too. For windy days, i was a private ballet, swirls and leaps with me, standing there, watching you, enjoy.
Greenie Oct 2016
Tosses me with black eyes~ He,
flipping us onto our necks, whistles.

Devil, devil, look me in the face and LIE.
>.<>.<>.<>.<>.<>.<>.<>.<>.

Me again, (it's real, it's real) i can't help but tear out the zippers of my clothes for you, crunch on muscles, oil my teeth.

And the sun kisses the sky goodnight :my dear: with its evanescent arms trailing out over the waters, tickling the fish i'd bet. But,

Marbles. They're obsidian carved, best of the best. He puts them where his eyes were when we met and thinks i can't tell the difference. Well i know. Oh boy sure i do, do i know, do i.
Oct 2016 · 266
diagnosis
Greenie Oct 2016
There's a calendar on my ceiling that's not really there but I sit underneath and count the hours (which wouldn't be there either but (I count and while I count I hold my breath and I pray ~knowing no god~ I pray for and end, end, end,
Oct 2016 · 635
Futures
Greenie Oct 2016
This sea is non-believing, filaments unhearing. So, magic in hand, i become tremors in the waves, rust in the walls.

Doll snatcher, let me down.
Sep 2016 · 333
college kid
Greenie Sep 2016
curvature of the thigh, smokestack scars and frothy seas.   so crouch with ready ears, involuntary vertebrae. sirens in the city-
Knock on our ribs and PRAY for us! oh, medusa,
mother.
adjusting
May 2016 · 338
Untitled
Greenie May 2016
You pointed to where she'd thrown the glass against the wall and then
traced the veins of my neck with your
nails,
clammish things with a lust for
god knows what
May 2016 · 323
scar
Greenie May 2016
And if it's propriety keeping me from gobbling
                                                        ­              up your suns and
                                                             ­                        moons
*******, fool i am, yes. But,
then again,
                                            id be but a shadow
                                            across your horizon,
nightmare from which you'll never wake,
                                                           ­      witch.
And, i say again, my love,
I never wished this upon you.
Apr 2016 · 717
Naloxone
Greenie Apr 2016
'Kilt.'
'She's kilt for sure,' as the sparrows look down at us,
Bluegills pecking away toes, memories.
Apr 2016 · 406
Implications
Greenie Apr 2016
What.

He ate out my heart and threw it up.
Poison lungs, poison veins-
****.

Viscera numbed, spined eels wriggle,
I am ******.

****** as in : a shut-in, swain of Gehenna, rocked, rolled.
He needed more rope for his net and so cut out my tendons.

What skies to worship now? What skins?
#lost #heart
Mar 2016 · 492
Sardonyx
Greenie Mar 2016
i am:
fall off the bone, tenderized,
dry. Caked mud falling from the mass.
God forsake me. The way in which a love clouds my nostrils and my mind will mesh shut at each new instance of the molecules O and H forming the stuff of my body, makes me faint.
I am now. Heartbeats tick unwillingly. I am yes.
Kiss me and I'm yours, I'm -fall into his arms, princess, you who have the world at your beck and call- , casual, I am innoculation.
innoculation:  a historical method for the prevention of smallpox by deliberate introduction of its pustules into the skin
Feb 2016 · 538
Ken Wilber's Integral
Greenie Feb 2016
prairie girl, home for the summer
                    steals ceramic eyes to shade
         sunrises of gasoline kisses -
                    she lies underneath and counts
                             each, whilst marveling at snow-
                             globe winds and birds that can't
                             fly.
Feb 2016 · 455
discours
Greenie Feb 2016
yellow clouds
     kiss
          smokey skies  
          awake as I wait for you.
I swear
    there are lighter winds
    this time and that peach
    is not a suitable smell but
No matter,
You're gone and   ~
                                      I'm so tired. My lips have
                                      cracked in anticipation of
                                      your kiss.
                                      \
but ******* it, when you come back you will
love me, I've decided it. You'll be smitten,
You will ache.
Feb 2016 · 1.3k
a short
Greenie Feb 2016
We were crazy.
he and i.
We'd cut ourselves with rocks to see
whose blood would run the fastest,
It was hailing and we went for a swim.
Nuts.
He said he had a rope. He said
there's two Smith and Wessons in his ******* closet.
I kissed him.
No favorite colors,
We'd lie in the shade of synagogues and under the blaze
of search lights, a couple of lost springs. Picking me
up around the corner so they wouldn't see, he'd
tumble his bike so that we'd fly and i'd scream.
Beautiful.
He said for us to run away. Never sweat. He said let's
run, let's ******* run. He said shut the ******* door.

I run. Run away. He doesn't like me to. He had a rope
and there's two Smith and Wessons in his closet.
Jan 2016 · 1.4k
chrysanthemum love
Greenie Jan 2016
Leaves fell
          p
            er
              p
                e­
                  tu
                    al
                    ­  ly
                               as we
didn't,
BuT I (your ardent lo>er)
Choose to smite
                         the indigenous winds and
                         forests' unpledged palates with
: A Stony Subjection:
In some countries of Europe, chrysanthemums are symbolic of death and are used only for funerals or on graves.
Nov 2015 · 399
status update
Greenie Nov 2015
She is looking out the window

again. Wishing for there to be

no window. That she could feel the

tumbles of pittering rain droplets as they

run with the wind. On her face. She

thinks on how her autumn-harvest

hair would plaster against her pinked-out

cheeks and jaw and lips. She

watches, seemingly unable to forget her

evening plans. It's down to her mother's

black silk or the leopard-skin

gloves, but both are ripped and she

doesn't know how to sew. She

isn't tired. She's exhilarated. Ready to

feel the rain and wind and trees sail

across her face and down her neck. She

sits and watches through glass panes as skies

whip clouds like batter.
Nov 2015 · 324
in search of mitigations
Greenie Nov 2015
flesh and b
                 o
                 n
                 e
flesh and b  l  o  o  d
                                          traps me
                                          |           |
                                          traps me
Nov 2015 · 676
Self-Professed Martyr
Greenie Nov 2015
we were blistering alongside streetlights in someone's
c,  a,     r , the blackened sky woven
together with a net of stars, I guess but I
didn't see,
He

gazed back at me from the front-
seat, his eyes spiking the air with
ecstasy — I
indulged,
lacing my body with
fluctuations from the all-consuming bass and the blackness with its
w         b
e

killing me
but it was lovely.
Nov 2015 · 439
Sick
Greenie Nov 2015
i blame You for this
t r a s h e d feeling in my
heart,
oh sWeET
song of mine.
Nov 2015 · 400
mantis
Greenie Nov 2015
Under a younger sun
                                perhaps
                     ­                         You
might have saved my life.

                       xox
                       grim reaper
Nov 2015 · 285
Rumination
Greenie Nov 2015
Ran, i
{ r { a } n }
with my heart beating, beating, beating I
Think.
and in my running , a thought   !~<    Ripped    >~!   into my chest as I threw myself                                                           ­                                                                 ­                                                      Forwards:
t­hat I would perpetually toss myself out
                                                             ­        w i n d o W s
for Him.
the whole of my insignificant existence.
Oct 2015 · 348
to pass the time
Greenie Oct 2015
The doctor’s screen flashes with
boxes, bells, ribbons
all so enchanting, shimmering, shining;
She’s been forgiven;
God says ‘yes,
you are,’ and she claps ‘please, please,’
her lungs now underseas, with blue ***** and
barricudas in search of new colonies.
Greenie Oct 2015
This is the coldest room in the
house, they say as we pull
out the fan with its blades a-
swirling and fill the air with
Friday night conjectures.
Her fears come out in
rivulets: red and black striped
maunder with thorns and
petals maybe rosy but I can’t
see it’s dark.
Jun 2015 · 508
theory of coercion
Greenie Jun 2015
i
am not
emotionally
stable and  I  like
my tea with a smoke so
what  I  am  still human and
still   forced   to   trudge  through
this god-awful place the same as you.
Apr 2015 · 282
wish with care please
Greenie Apr 2015
i just wanted for you to run me
over with your sugary words and
bold gait and you did, by god, you
ran me straight into the ground so
that i linger along the walls and in
the cracks under the pavement and
how could i
do this
to
me
Apr 2015 · 789
clams for toes
Greenie Apr 2015
I prefer swimming
because I feel the water
and the sand and shells
carrying my weight, my emotions
Waves rock me to and fro like a lullaby
to sleep, sleep with lights,
snow, and no-promises on the
other side. O brethren, pick
me up with the unwanted jellies
on the beach. and wash me
out, swirl, away/Let us roar
upon far shores and
dance with the sharks and stars,
forever fleeing the drying-up sun
Mar 2015 · 385
tranquilized
Greenie Mar 2015
run-smooth leather
these passenger seats bare
never hides truly these
run-down ambitions
Mar 2015 · 692
Overdose on Epinephrine
Greenie Mar 2015
I prefer that the adrenaline race alongside my bones rather than swim at an unpretentious gait and
I know it's short-lived but ,oh god, I love the feeling of no-tomorrows.
Jan 2015 · 523
give me back my flavor
Greenie Jan 2015
Fiend he was and fed away my heart to the pack of nightscratchers in his wake - all the while looking me in the eyes, my superfluous pose, his wired,

wicked laugh echoing at me in my dreams, behind my nose and in every strand of

flitting, fleeting hair, like a mechanical fantasy of Mr. Poe, and It was Then, in that freakishly drawn-out moment of my life that I realized I am not a girl, this nonsense may have

ripped the veins from around that kaleidoscope dreamland of my interior but from now till on I will

live unreal realities outside the mind, bequeathing thoughts and sense but as a woman,

taking my fall with grace, gracing the light with a smile, smiling at the

dreams
                     I
                             once
                                         dreamt.
Jan 2015 · 480
dear self wake up
Greenie Jan 2015
and I know that at this moment I am like the flapping
/for sale/ signs in the wind but on the inside I feel so
safe,        not       hot        not       cold        but this soupy
mix that only reinvigorates when that biting wind
reminds me of future engagements.
Jan 2015 · 325
mulling over futures
Greenie Jan 2015
on days when this house is not a home i
pull my body out the doors and into the
earth's  chilly fragrance. and if the sky is
bold  i   light  my  heart  with  the  stars'
possibility  and  i  hope  and  i hope that
one day maybe i will be who i want and
i  will  look in the mirror in the morning
and say to myself yes, this  is  who i am,
who i lived for all those days  when  my
fingers    felt    sick  and people said my
smile didn't  match  my eyes. maybe i'll
find  someone to  explode  with,  maybe
i'll     share     my    freedom    with    my
ancestors    maybe    i   will  but  i  hope.
Jan 2015 · 337
short wish lists
Greenie Jan 2015
i used to want to be the hero

now I just wish to be saved

from myself, like some helpless

princess in a tower
Jan 2015 · 980
sleepy
Greenie Jan 2015
I
being that I am
alive  as  best  I  can
look forward to the days
full of humming thrall and the
nights in which I may rest in peace.
Jan 2015 · 398
paying rent for wisdom
Greenie Jan 2015
in          the
midst of all
this    numb
wandering
i   begin   to
see       with
clarity
the
sunrise
neighboring
the      duller
stars  i   may
have     once
prayed    on.
Greenie Jan 2015
im
warm
and its cold and
i don't even want to
think on the way your stealthily
soft breath felt near my ear i want you out
out, out, please get out of my head i cant seem to get
these hallucinations of you from behind my eyes and it makes
me feel so weak and i hate weakness, hate it, hate it, you make me
weak you
fiend.
Jan 2015 · 646
new years
Greenie Jan 2015
sometimes the
stars seem to clink
like glass and then fall
out of place and drop and drop
until maybe I guess they land in some
farmers field in Armenia or Laos and then
perhaps a young boy will go out to play and find
a feat that will take away his boyish charm
but oh those boyish fantasies will
soar
Dec 2014 · 384
addiction
Greenie Dec 2014
once I
asked why
he insisted on
becoming someone
else with his drugs and his
gangs and he told me that he was
one with water and that it flowed
in him because why not the
summers are only so
long what is
there to
lose
'me' I said
you maybe left
me a ways back when
we were crossing the desert
and you saw a lake shimmer with
golden glaciers you promised but its not
that I care about I want to ride in your car as
you race to the finish base of the sphinx so maybe
ill join you on your bet with the devil as long as we're
together right?
Dec 2014 · 364
beginnings
Greenie Dec 2014
and i think now id be happy to
stand behind you as you say 'yes' with
waves in your throat
and mountains in your eyes
Dec 2014 · 332
Made to last
Greenie Dec 2014
And in the mirror is an older girl from yesterday, for it was then that I wrote every fantasy for which i've yearned upon a golden sheaf and I tied it to a kite, black and red and orange, and I watched it sail up and up and up and forever away from here, for what will dreaming do me except milky teardrops and sagging doorframes. I'd like to live a life in peace away from falsities, and it is for that reason which I cringe at the lies and shallow untruths which are spoken around my core, too close, I push away. If I could fly I would go to the seas with whitecaps of pearl and ruby fishes jumping across my lazy, sundried belly, impregnated with ideals, puffy with a folly that gives the only true happiness. But if is but a word and I am but a girl and maybe with my grandmothers looking down upon me I will be that emerald eyed fox running for the moon.
Nov 2014 · 570
Best Friend
Greenie Nov 2014
I    wish     I could    write  her a
poem   to   do   justice,  but  how
does  one  write  a love  poem  to
the   sculpting   of   her    neck.  I
love  her,  not  dejectedly, flatly
nor  frantically,  but  full  of  that
perfect,    full   ­ pleasure    which
whips,   through   veins   and  all
Nov 2014 · 394
Hello Poets
Greenie Nov 2014
my favorite poems are
chapters in a story
I can watch as you
fall in love or
squash insecurity
I can almost say im
there with you.
Nov 2014 · 3.6k
oh boy.
Greenie Nov 2014
dealer looks at me
he makes time stand still
drilling through the barren sea I call my face
and I can tell he knows, just how much like jelly
my bones become with him standing there and how melty
the wasteland I call my heart gets: a phenomenon Id call unsafe and self betraying.
Oct 2014 · 1000
Untitled
Greenie Oct 2014
the man with whom I am in love
gets others high in his freetime
and deals.

i wish helplessly to be his only business interest.
Sep 2014 · 497
birthday jacket
Greenie Sep 2014
its always when we walk at night
on the right side away from the yellowed lights
we pick each other up in our arms and
we run
because that's what we were born to do

I do believe
we were made for each other. every last one of us
made to press against the dents to hold the blood in
and ill love them forever because
its only with them that
I live, truly
Sep 2014 · 294
why?
Greenie Sep 2014
because I haven't yet.
Sep 2014 · 307
fire in my kitchen
Greenie Sep 2014
i want to say i  love  you so bad
i   feel   the   words         catch         in        my         throat
every            time           you     say goodbye     .
feel my fingers start to reach out to pull you back again
but if I did I would    m    e     l     t

it would be easier
if       you     just       said       it               first
Sep 2014 · 263
Untitled
Greenie Sep 2014
i like to dance
by myself
but mostly
when i know
someone else is
watching
Aug 2014 · 660
shallow sundown
Greenie Aug 2014
lately ive been feeling a bit blue
moondance on my own  ===  just one shadow the light does skew
ive cracked my wrists, and I cant seem to figure,
stare dumbly down, aching to feel what once was vigor
but whats strange this time, is the space between
the humorly disgust for them who did once upon me === preen

guess im on my own now
love you Ari.
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